Sex, Argument and Intimacy: Don't scratch every itch

Don't scratch every itch

By Anonymous - 27/05/2012 14:19 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my boyfriend and I were acting out a kinky scenario at home, where we'd met in a club and were having a one night stand. We ended up getting into a real argument about an imaginary girl in the club. I didn't have sex and we haven't spoken since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 047

You deserved it 36 064

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Same thing different taste

By too good - 24/10/2014 10:54 - United Kingdom - Dartford

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 052

You deserved it 14 579

The best laid plans…

By A drunk walks into a bar and says NO SEX TONIGHT - 22/07/2022 16:00

Today, while trying to spice up our marriage, we decided to get a hotel room and roleplay as strangers who meet in a bar and have a one night stand. By the time I got there, he was engrossed in the football and on the beer. He didn't notice me arrive and when he did, he was too drunk to get the roleplay right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 525

You deserved it 299

By Anonymous - 16/06/2009 17:39 - United States

Today, I let my on-again, off-again boyfriend spend the night. For months we had been fighting about his new flame. After he convinced me that they are no longer an item, we had the most mind-blowing sex then we fell asleep. I awoke to him moaning her name. Followed by pelvic thrusts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 040

You deserved it 54 359

Cut it out

By uhhggggg - 02/01/2010 17:16 - France

Today, I was trying to be dirty with my fiancé. He got really into the roleplaying and wouldn't stop pretending to be a cop for hours. Mood officially killed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 621

You deserved it 4 352

Disappointed

By WhatALetdown - 25/11/2015 00:26 - United States - Danbury

Today, I had sex with the guy who had been the main subject of my bean-flicking fantasies since I met him. It was the absolute worst sex of my life. I guess some things are just better left to the imagination. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 647

You deserved it 5 537

By Anonymous - 14/04/2014 03:17 - United States

Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 986

You deserved it 7 876

Life imitating art, or…?

By Bik - 27/06/2023 22:00

Today, some filthy creep grabbed my girlfriend's ass in front of me. I smashed his face in, as would be expected. Afterwards, we had wild sex, then she cried, told me how frightened my "unprovoked violent response" made her, and kicked me out. I'm now in a seedy motel, wondering what the hell happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 088

You deserved it 417

Back and forth and back again

By Anonymous - 07/01/2015 19:37 - Guam - Barrigada

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 065

You deserved it 3 935

Make believe

By somebodyelse - 17/08/2009 05:13 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 888

You deserved it 5 516

Caught

By Anonanon - 12/07/2011 17:10 - United Kingdom

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after, he gave me the "let's just be friends" speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex-girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 930

You deserved it 13 845

missamerica95 0

Sunday 27 May 2012 19:47

People these days. Seriously? If you're old enough to have sex then you should be old enough to work through petty arguments. Grow up.

Crazynopantsman 11

Sunday 27 May 2012 19:48

What the hell.

Comments

ALesserIvy 2

Tuesday 29 May 2012 15:29

Your boyfriend us cheating on you Your welcome

superfire 3

Tuesday 29 May 2012 22:10

Well that's a good excuse to have make up sex and maybe throw in some angry sex In there while your at it

bubo_fml 10

Wednesday 30 May 2012 0:22

I bet he found the imaginary girl quite... "Handy!"

hollabackbitch13 3

Wednesday 30 May 2012 6:38

Sounds pretty kinky :p

totallyoriginal 4

Tuesday 14 August 2012 18:39

Immature.

haleystar16 7

Friday 8 March 2013 15:57

How about y'all just try something easier instead of something so complex

jmw24 8

Thursday 3 October 2013 15:48

I swear people just make shit up to fight about! how stupid are you both?!

6demon6spawn6 12

Tuesday 27 May 2014 21:30

wow my roleplays with my fiancee never get THAT realistic ...

fantasyworld 37

Monday 1 December 2014 4:16

How does that even happen?

MozillaHostile 21

Friday 9 October 2015 8:06

I don't even get role-playing. I mean, normal sex is good enough for me, without it being really awkward.

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I agree, your life sucks 45 040

You deserved it 4 329

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I agree, your life sucks 5 526

You deserved it 352

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I agree, your life sucks 2 973

You deserved it 158

Today, while laying in bed with my girlfriend, I felt her grab my manhood through a layer of blankets. I got a bit stiff, just in time for her to clench tight, and pull violently. She didn't know "it" was in her hand, as she was trying to cover herself with the blanket. My manhood is now red and swollen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 982

You deserved it 1 173

Today, my sister got her car insurance quote in the mail. You would think it would go way up after being charged with reckless driving. It went up $1 per month. My insurance went up $100 per month after I tapped someone's bumper a year ago. I wasn't even charged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 558

You deserved it 1 682

Today, I caught myself staring at my grandmother's cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 959

You deserved it 50 259

Same thing different taste

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