Intimacy: Double-edged sword

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Double-edged sword

By Janitoro - 23/11/2012 01:19 - United States

Today, I was blessed with a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs. And cursed with a girlfriend who is also somehow really bad at them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 437

You deserved it 9 218

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Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

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Same thing different taste

In training

By Anonymous - 13/12/2023 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend loves giving blowjobs; the problem is she is very bad at them, refuses to admit she is bad at them, and cries and stops talking to me every time I try and tell her how to do it better. My knob is red and sore where she keeps catching it with her teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 633

You deserved it 200

Miscommunication

By Anonymous - 25/10/2012 05:45 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 736

You deserved it 18 588

By PlayTag - 05/02/2009 00:58 - United States

Today, my girlfriend gave me a blow-up doll and told me to practice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 863

You deserved it 18 705

By hitintheeye - 26/11/2011 15:09 - Canada

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 618

You deserved it 17 167

Hidden

By bootyislife - 16/06/2015 20:01 - United States - Lynnwood

Today, my girlfriend made me put a blanket over my head while giving me a blowjob because she didn't like the faces I was making. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 696

You deserved it 7 408

By noname - 04/12/2008 05:55 - France

Today, after having waited three long months, my shy girlfriend finally gave me a blowjob. Everything was going really well until I said, "Wow, you're really talented. Anyone would think you've been practicing your whole life." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 660

You deserved it 61 904

Repetitive

By justgreat - 24/03/2012 02:30 - United States - Opa Locka

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 624

You deserved it 6 232

By Ohai - 16/01/2009 20:46 - United States

Today, my mom asked me for advice on how to give a good blow job. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 588

You deserved it 3 078

The pleasure, the pain

By BadBribe - 24/06/2009 19:15 - United States

Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me a blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 211

You deserved it 30 242

By katie - 25/05/2011 08:23

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 005

You deserved it 19 186

LiyIa_fml 8

Friday 23 November 2012 8:22

Practice makes perfect?

RoboCunnilingus 23

Friday 23 November 2012 8:23

On the bright side, at least she isn't giving them to someone else.

Comments

ChaoSKinG86 7

Tuesday 27 November 2012 0:45

Pratice pratice pratice. Be honest with her and tell her how you like it

pancakes_O_O 3

Tuesday 27 November 2012 3:21

******** are like pizza. Even when they're bad, they're still pretty damn good. So appreciate them.

leadwithlove 1

Thursday 29 November 2012 5:34

How can you be bad at that. So simple.

HitchHiker42 18

Thursday 29 November 2012 12:08

Who cares if she's not great at them? She enjoys sucking your dick, so why complain? Besides, she'll get better.

slendamon 0

Sunday 2 December 2012 7:48

Iknow how you feel bro :/

bobbigirl71 2

Tuesday 4 December 2012 12:34

Omg Dude,You MUST have done something really bad in a past life for that one!!

ryan1268 18

Thursday 6 December 2012 4:52

She will end up getting it right. Just tell her what she needs to work on I know how you feel.

Le_Tsu 1

Thursday 6 December 2012 22:32

Practice makes perfect. No one starts out good.

SamCrow 1

Monday 10 December 2012 21:52

Teach her what u like

Chrisrulez66 9

Tuesday 2 February 2016 22:35

Many do not learn. I tried to teach my ex.. 7 years. That bitch would still use her teeth almost every time

Playnwitu 0

Wednesday 12 December 2012 14:46

She'll get better bro I think its a good thing you can kinda guide her to what you like. Be happy you have a ball of clay waiting to be molded!

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Health Medication Mental health Weird Miscellaneous Alcohol Healthy Lifestyle Intimacy Gross Sex Housework Work Public freakouts Parents Ironic Anxiety Weddings Love Romantic Friends Birthday Awkward Embarrassing Transportation AITA Dogs Shopping My ex Lonely Family

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