Transportation, Cars and Cops: Drive on - FML

Drive on

By uncool - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, the only person to wish me a "Happy birthday" was the cop who'd pulled me over, as he handed me my ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 041

You deserved it 5 136

Back to school: Courses and confusion
When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

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Same thing different taste

By bdayloser - 07/11/2009 05:24 - Canada

Today, I celebrated my 18th birthday. Alone. My only birthday wish came from the police officer who gave me a ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 666

You deserved it 3 847

By Jims - 29/04/2011 14:00 - Singapore

Today, the only person who wished me a happy birthday is the policeman who checked my identity card for being "suspiciously gangster-like". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 460

You deserved it 5 763

By annoyed - 10/02/2009 03:59 - United States

Today, I got a ticket. From my dad the cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 710

You deserved it 18 355

By Sarah-D - 29/07/2016 05:31

Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 265

You deserved it 2 261

Backwards world

By Anonymous - 03/10/2020 03:02 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, my life is so messed up that when I got pulled over, the officer asked about my life and not only did I not receive a ticket, he made me write down his personal number, patrol number and to call if I ever needed a favor or to talk, telling me that I had a friend in him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 472

You deserved it 279

By FML - 05/01/2012 15:56 - United States

Today, I received a ticket for not having my headlights on. The cop who pulled me over had a broken headlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 830

You deserved it 4 958

By Anonymous - 04/02/2017 19:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, at an MA meeting, I ran into the cop who'd pulled me over and given me a ticket for marijuana possession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 508

You deserved it 1 316

By randinosaur - 13/03/2011 12:48 - United States

Today, a cop rear-ended me. Then I received a ticket from him for driving too far under the speed limit. We were in a school zone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 160

You deserved it 4 256

By ironic driver - 04/09/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 567

You deserved it 4 613

Baited

By Anonymous - 11/09/2010 01:44 - United States

Today, while I was driving, a police officer jumped out from the sidewalk and into my lane. I slammed on the brakes so I wouldn't hit him. He then gave me a ticket for "obstructing traffic." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 341

You deserved it 2 578

Next

Top comments

Nimmrodel 11

Saturday 16 April 2011 12:16

He was doing his job and being nice at the same time. :)

ElGranOrgo 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 12:17

happy birthday...

Comments

Stupidpeopleanno 5

Saturday 16 April 2011 15:46

Happy belated birthday! Or whatever the expression is.

xx_Sarah_xxxxx 6

Saturday 16 April 2011 15:52

well happy birthday :) hope your day gets better....surprise party maybe??

lmaoatall 6

Saturday 16 April 2011 15:56

should have shown him your birthday suit. 9 out of 10 times it will get you AND the officer off.

TraceCase_ 19

Saturday 16 April 2011 16:05

In a sarcastic prick kinda way, or a genuine "Sorry I have to give you a ticket on your birthday, but what you did to get pulled over was really dumb" kinda way??? Either way, Happy Birthday, from another complete stranger!!!!

sweetangelgal 3

Saturday 16 April 2011 16:06

aw happy birthday sweety mwahz, many more years to come, XD

Devin91 20

Saturday 16 April 2011 16:24

happy birthday then(:

khaya 9

Saturday 16 April 2011 16:40

Just like OP name that is uncool.

EMT1020 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 16:40

haha this happened to me to in VA cops can be assholes

hockeyrocks39 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 0:44

Yeah because I'm sure you didn't do it and you've never broke a traffic law before... poor thing, getting a ticket after the million other times you've probably got away with it or some other traffic infraction. I know I've broke my fair share so I think it's only fair when I get caught.

Cowgurl_94 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 17:34

Man that really sucks. :( well HAPPY B-DAY!!! :)

borntoperform 14

Saturday 16 April 2011 17:45

HAPPY BIRTHDAY:))))))))))

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Keywords

Surprise Love Cute My ex Texting Awkward Wanker Intimacy Sex Mental health Health Insomnia Sleep Food Cooking Kids Parents Weekend Pranks Annoying Miscellaneous Work Embarrassing Technology Zoom Coworkers Argument Roommate Pizza Animals

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 412

You deserved it 23 269

Today, my new neighbor asked if I could keep my dog from yapping during the evenings, because it kept him awake last night. I don't have a dog, but I apologized anyway. I didn't have the heart to admit that those are the sounds my girlfriend makes during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 020

You deserved it 8 493

The Top

Today, my son was on Facebook while he was supposed to be studying. He called me a liar and accused me of making up excuses to chew him out. How do I know he was online? He liked and commented on a video I posted. My son is a dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 094

You deserved it 8 744

Today, I found out the can of spray paint I got at Walmart yesterday has no spray nozzle, rendering it useless. I'm working on a project that needs to be done by the weekend, so I get to go wait in a huge line and risk being trampled to death tonight just to exchange one damn spray paint can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 787

You deserved it 3 270

Today, our company hit our sales goals, an all-time high since before the pandemic. Our reward after working so hard all year long? A goodie bag with a keychain with the company logo on them. When I suggested a bonus, my boss said, “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 917

You deserved it 110

TToday, my daughter was hungover, so to teach her a lesson I started banging a pot next to her ear. An hour later, we’re in hospital. She wasn’t hungover; she hadn’t even been drinking. Her migraine was a huge aneurism one sneeze away from bursting and killing her instantly. I’m a terrible dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 339

You deserved it 2 476

Today, on my 18th birthday, my mom told me the man I thought was my father for 18 years was actually not my father, and my real father was in prison for murder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 103

You deserved it 2 129

Today, after the two week winter break, I went back to school to find that the bookbag that I'd left in my car was covered in some creepy, pink gooey stuff. Under the freezing conditions, my lotion had exploded all over my notes and bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 354

You deserved it 22 694