Effective

By Nublet - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Spicy
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 408
You deserved it 5 582

Same thing different taste

Top comments

ImmaB3AST 7

what the hell are you? a vacuum cleaner?

Comments

CatEyes66 0

Do you have braces? Which made him so nervous that he had a panic attack.

What did you do to him if I may ask? Or he is just not made for having ********, haha.

So now the question is: Can you suck-start a Harley? You haven't made it in the BJ world until you can do that.

Geez, I can't imagine what you could have done to cause that...? Maybe he was so nervous about it beforehand that anxiety got the best of him and he freaked? Sucks way more for him, he's probably mortified.

enonymous 8

Giving head with braces will give anyone a panic attack...

Georgieeporgiee 9

In the literal sense... An oh dear... I'm getting braces soon...

enonymous 8

Stop giving head Georgie... I know I know it's a hard thing to give up. Take up smoking it's like a smaller penis(not in my case however)

lolx7 5

in my opinion I think ******** are nasty. do u guys think us girls like it at all?!?

enonymous 8

108 - I find holding your purse in a store nasty, sat thru the twilight saga and bought packs of tampons for you when you needed them. One way or another someone's blowing me at some point.

Oh, I see what you did there. 86--At age 14, do you really need to be giving out BJs? Yeah, I didn't think so.

austinkiser 3

Anyone notice op is post #129 lol

paynee 0

sucks more for him? actually, he didn't get sucked at all..

legitimmeee 0

108-my girlfriend loves ********, and she begs me to let her give me one

ImmaB3AST 7

what the hell are you? a vacuum cleaner?

dudeitsdanny 9

....Were you chewing on it or something? Cause I'd be scared, if a girl acted like she's about to bit it off o.o Or maybe it was just an incredibly intense ******!

introducing, for your chewing pleasure - **** gum!

really? i dont believe it, give me a bj to second the motion...

Wow ... I had some slight anxiety & panic attacks growing up. However none of those were a direct result from giving and/or receiving oral sex. The more I hear about this generation the more I want to bash open the back of it's skull with a hammer.

ImmaB3AST 7

the more I read this, the more I wanted to bash you in the back of the skull with a hammer

dudeitsdanny 9

The more I read this, the more I wish I had a skull-shaped hammer

It's ok. Obviously, hearing the truth & facing reality can't be easy for you.

Maybe because you never gave and/or received oral??:)

"This generation?" I don't think I'm exactly part of the current generation.

Maybe you should practice your blowing skills. I've heard a harmonica can help with this.