Birthday and Drugs: Far out, man

Far out, man

By shroomda - 29/06/2009 07:29 - United States

Today, I called my dad to wish him happy birthday. The phone was disconnected, so I called my sister to see what his cell phone number was. She then informed me that our dad was in jail for selling shrooms to teenagers at a music festival out of state. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 245

You deserved it 3 407

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

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By Furnando - 06/01/2023 00:00

Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 1 155

By Kellye - 16/09/2009 00:24 - United States

Today, my father called me for the first time in two weeks since I moved away. Excited, I answered the phone. It was a mistake. He thought he'd called my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 339

You deserved it 2 527

By CaptainByron - 28/04/2017 00:00

Today, my father contacted me for the first time in close to 2 months. The first thing he did was ask if I wanted to buy some weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 383

You deserved it 313

By No one special. - 12/12/2010 05:28 - United States

Today, my dad called for the first time in six months. He needs someone to bail him out of jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 497

You deserved it 2 433

By seb21 - 09/02/2009 02:32 - United States

Today, I called my dad to inform him I was coming home from college for the weekend. Expecting him to be excited, he responded with "why?" This weekend was my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 521

You deserved it 2 324

By thanks - 02/05/2014 18:20 - United States - San Francisco

Today, it's my 21st birthday. I got a call from my deadbeat dad, who I thought had finally mellowed and had something nice to say. Nope; he just told me I'm 21 years a disappointment, then hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 000

You deserved it 3 524

By Anonymous - 09/12/2012 06:43 - United States

Today, I called my dad, because I haven't spoken to him in a while, and I wanted to invite him to my graduation in May. When he picked up, I said, "Hey, how have you been, dad?" He scoffed, "Wrong number" and hung up the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 857

You deserved it 3 088

Understanding

By Anonymous - 02/09/2020 05:56 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, it was my dad's 60th. I was planning on calling him early, but due to a client (I'm a social worker) ending up in hospital because her husband beat her up, I couldn't call him until 2:30. My mum phoned me in tears, yelling that I was a bad daughter and obviously didn't care about my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 950

You deserved it 746

Arrested

By shikushiku - 03/08/2016 03:12 - United States - Plano

Today, my father went missing. Naturally worried, we searched his workplace, hospitals, and other locations. Turns out he got arrested for driving around town drunk out of his mind. Oh, and it's my birthday. Thanks for throwing me a great (search) party, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 382

You deserved it 989

By Anonymous - 09/04/2009 18:48 - United States

Today, I got a missed call from my dad, who hasn't talked to me in months and has vowed not to have anything to do with me. I called him back excitedly and apologized for missing his call, and we had a 20-second conversation about how his phone accidentally dialed my number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 165

You deserved it 3 550

tipsypiink 0

Monday 29 June 2009 19:07

HOLY ****, I BOUGHT SHROOMS FROM YOUR DAD AT BONNAROO.

owlcansing 0

Monday 29 June 2009 19:40

Well look at the bright side - he'll still have a "cell".

Comments

SeventhFonons 0

Tuesday 30 June 2009 22:41

Illegal drugs scare me ._.

giantsolstice87 0

Tuesday 30 June 2009 23:31

**** the war on drugs.

SoFaded80 0

Friday 28 August 2009 19:13

yah well, ur a pussy

Hootieknows 0

Wednesday 1 July 2009 1:47

Yeah your dad rocks and that sucks!

kaleb0121 0

Wednesday 1 July 2009 3:43

wow

HAHAHSUCKS4YOU 0

Wednesday 1 July 2009 5:54

..drugs = bad

ledzeplover 0

Wednesday 1 July 2009 8:05

all of you are really annoying to be completely honest. get over yourself. step outta your box. and open up your mind! dont knock it before you try it first.. your dad sounds awesome.. go visit him in the slammmer :)

ohhhh_Ashley 0

Wednesday 1 July 2009 13:24

55 we're not lazy, because that's what they are actually called. real mushrooms aren't drugs.

SoFaded80 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 11:48

damn isnt the offence for selling boomers manslaughter or something? and 103 has it totally right, open your mind. seriously they are life-changing. that totally sucks that ur dads in jail thoo

boobroken 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 10:20

thats terribleee. i feel so bad for youuu. my uncle went to jail for giving 13 yearolds heroine and then daring them to do dumb shit. lmfao. i hate that man... never met him.