Gagging for it

By comeuntome - 29/11/2012 19:42 - United States

Spicy
Today, it's the first day of my two-week stay at my in-laws' house. They forbid drinking, smoking, cursing, and anything even remotely sexual. I smuggled in my quietest toy to keep me sane in this holy house. If only I hadn't forgotten to bring the battery pack too. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 966
You deserved it 29 846
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Same thing different taste

It's all downhill from here

By Anonymous - 06/10/2022 10:00 - United Kingdom - Farnborough

Today, my parents searched my room because yesterday they found one of my friends vapes in my bag, which they made me return. Sadly, they found a box vape with 2 e-juices and gave me a talking to. So now, I'm never allowed out of the house until I'm 18 (I'm 14 right now) and I'm never allowed friends over. Also, they're really mean. FML
I agree, your life sucks 336
You deserved it 2 469
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Top comments

TopBanana20 11

It's two weeks -_-. Get a grip. I think you can survive two weeks without any of that stuff.

471 43

Comments

dryersheet 11

If I were you, I'd be a LOT more concerned about how your in-laws are keeping track of your sexual activities.

1 1
xcountrygirlx 8

their house, their rules. op, I really feel you need to learn some self control. two weeks isn't that long. I'm sure you can drive somewhere if you are that desperate.

6 7
haze10baby 3

I really don't think it'll be that bad... Suck it up maybe? But if you can't resist, why not go buy them??

2 1
johnny_derp 3

the amount of YDI's on this is disgusting. yeah, how dare a woman have sexual needs! those are for us menfolk!

7 10
captain__jj 5

The YDIs are probably due to the fact that OP is too stupid to remember her battery pack than the fact that she's horny.

4 2
johnny_derp 3

that's still pretty stupid. she probably assumed they were already in the vibrator. you and I both know that this would have less than half the YDI's if it were a man. don't even try to deny it. not only that, but there are hardly any comments about the batteries... only comments criticizing the OP for not wanting to go 2 weeks without sexual activity. if the gender said "male" everyone would be coddling him and telling him what a bitch the mother in law was.

1 0
SpLo0gIeR 9

What are the in-laws gonna do catch them? Even if they did what are they gonna do ground them?

1 1
rebelliousshroom 12

I think the real FML here is that OP doesn't know how to ********** with her fingers, at least not very well. For a woman with such insisting sexual urges, that's really surprising. She probably got a vibrator way too early. Learn to walk before your run! As for the husband issue: The only way this FML makes sense, is that the in-laws make them sleep in different bedrooms. I have actually heard of that in cases where the couple isn't married. In this case it's just strange, though.

7 1
FlyingPie 17

It sounds like you're going to be at your in-laws' house without your husband, so I'm confused about why they bothered to mention sexual stuff? I guess if I were them, I wouldn't really want to know if a guest masturbated in my house, but if you do so quietly so they won't know, what they don't know wouldn't hurt them, right? That said, I do agree that it shouldn't be that difficult to go 2 weeks without masturbating.

1 1
alishous 8

I think you'll be fine, plus it's their house, be respectful and follow their rules

1 2
ilovefall10 21

Boo hoo hoo. I do neither of that stuff and I'm perfectly sane.

6 4