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By kfoehslfns - 01/08/2010 08:45 - United States

Today, I was woken up at 3:00 am to the sound of a tape recording of a baby crying, loudly. This has been going on for 3 nights, non stop. Why? because I brought up the subject of having a baby with my wife. Clearly, you can see where she stands. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 470
You deserved it 12 784
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Top comments

Xquisite1 28

For all of you saying "it's her choice" you're right but also realize thats this is a a major issue in a marriage and can lead to divorce. It's unfair for him to force her to become a mother and it's also unfair for her to expect him to spend the rest of his life without ever knowing what it's like to become a father (if he stays with her). Children don't suck, it's all in how you raise and discipline them.

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okieraider71 4

Very smart woman. Very intellegent way to make her point. I hope you think about the point she is making. Babies are "No Refunds-No Returns".

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Comments

cheerchick4life 0

haha wow I think ur wife is trying to show u that u aren't ready for a baby yet.

1 0
spartan_girl 0

-to everyone saying "you should talk about this before you get married". Absolutely, yes, you should. But do you honestly think people can't change their minds about it? Also, if neither of them had strong feelings about the topic, maybe they thought it would work itself out. I want kids someday. I'm not set on it, and I don't want any yet. My husband doesn't really like kids. When we did pre-marital counseling, we talked about it for quite a while, and we had talked about it before. Basically, we decided that I'm not so set on having kids that it will ruin my life if we don't, and my husband isn't so set against it (and realizes that it's different when it's your own child) that he will up and leave if I get pregnant. When we occasionally talk about it now, we seem to have decided that once we are more financially stable and more career-stable, we want to try. But either of us could have changed our minds. We're human. -As much as I think this sounds like a funny pay-back that would make me laugh in a movie or TV show, I don't really think it's fair. Yes, if you have a kid, it will wake you up in the middle of the night many times, but it would be for a reason. Although paternity leave is not yet common in the US, new fathers can take days off of work, and in many cases, it will be understood that they are tired shortly after having a child, and co-workers/bosses can try to help out. He's just being woken up because his wife is angry. Even if it's the weekend, he has every right to be annoyed about being woken up for no reason whatsoever.

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xMaNNiNGx119 0

it's funny because you keep waking up at 3:00 am to the sound a crying baby.

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siouxzeee 0

you realize how intense the expectations of motherhood are, right? in most families, there is not an equal distribution of child-rearing labor, so i can definitely see why your wife isn't really keen on having a kid when she knows it will ultimately be HER full-time responsibility. that's not to say, of course, that there aren't amazing single dads or situations where the father is the go-to person for bathing, clothing, diaper changing, and monitoring the baby, but our society is just set up in a way that makes women the default nurturers. also, maybe she just doesn't want kids for completely different reasons. turns out they are a lottttt of work and there's no way MORE people who don't want children should be talked into doing so. You should have talked about it before getting married, but even if she expressed an interest then (which it sounds like she didn't), she shouldn't then be obligated to never change her mind on the topic. The same would apply to you were the roles reversed. Still, it is unfortunate that you two disagree :(

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The_good_times 0

Having no kids isn't as fun as some of you seem to think. Yes when the baby f*cks up your good night sleep and puts you through hell most couples will probably be jealous of others that don't have kids, but once they start to grow up and you'll get older, trust me, the couples with no kids will be the ones jealous of you. This is what I've seen from personal experience, it might not be true for all couples and some might really be happy until the end of their lives and never regret not having kids, but a lot of couples start regretting it once they pass a certain age. So think about that, think about how it'll be when you're 50-60-70 and there will be nobody to carry on your name, nobody to make you the proudest you've ever been in your entire live, nobody to leave everything you've worked for to(yeah you can leave it to someone else but it's not the same as leaving it to your offspring) etc.

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marcranger 28

you have had a completely different personal experience. the childless retirees I know have no regrets about never having children and have led richer, more fulfilling lives than anyone I know with children, including my parents. I'm sure there are satisfied people out there who feel their lives would have been incomplete without kids, but a lot of people I know don't regret having kids bit wouldn't do it if given a second chance, either.

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aback 4

@151 "think about how it'll be when you're 50-60-70 and there will be nobody to carry on your name, nobody to make you the proudest you've ever been in your entire live, nobody to leave everything you've worked for to(yeah you can leave it to someone else but it's not the same as leaving it to your offspring) etc." That's called "living vicariously". I'd rather do my living, myself. Besides, it's better to end up wishing you'd had kids, than wishing you hadn't.

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LilaBear 1

#168 - that's not living vicariously. Living vicariously is like, living *through* someone else. There is a difference between getting your child to do all the things you wish you'd done, and being proud of THEM as their own person. And there's a major difference between living vicariously through them, and making them your legacy (ie. something you leave behind when you die) and leaving things to them. It is also really insensitive to say "Besides, it's better to end up wishing you'd had kids, than wishing you hadn't". There are thousands of would-be parents out there who are devastated over the fact they can't have kids and would say it's better to end up wishing you'd not had kids, rather than wishing you had. At least if you have a kid you don't want you can give it up for adoption. It's not quite as easy the other way round.

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adorkable_spazz 0

i know right? my baby sis used to wake the entire house up with her crying. if he can't take a recording, how's he going to deal with the real thing?

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yougotitgood 4

she coulda just got her tubes tied

2 0
dynky 3

you ever tried convincing a doctor to do that when you're a young childless woman? I wish it were that easy.

3 0
bugmenotmofo 34

Hey OP? Whaaaaaaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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lindsaylikeomg 0

it doesn't necessarily mean she doesn't want kids, she's probably using the tapes to prove to you that you're not ready to have kids yet, because clearly you're not. she's just showing you what it's going to be like once you do have kids, and if it bothers you so much after 3 nights, obviously you're not ready for years of constant crying/screaming.

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LilaBear 1

what is wrong with you people who think the OP is not ready to have kids just because he's sick of his immature wife playing a tape recording?? My impression was that he's FML-ing the fact his wife doesn't want kids and he does, plus the fact she's too immature to talk about it and would resort to childish behaviour. Nothing suggests he's FML-ing the idea of waking up to a crying baby.

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