Agreed, #1. That flippant and ultimately harmless username was completely unprovoked! It would be one thing if it was posted on an anecdote in which the OP's mom said something hurtful, but this came from nowhere! Wait…

I think the "only child" part is to clarify that OP's mother could not have been talking about a sibling.

You think so?

never give my mom massages and she doesn't say that about me or my siblings

And I don't think bribing your mom with all that to change her mind is the right way to go about things.

It's nice to do things for toe mother, but you're not her servant. You shouldn't have to wait on her hand and foot just to have motherly love.

#3, that's flipping hilarious!!! I literally laughed out loud when I read your post; it was genius! I love how you started off with a typical response from our fellow FMLers then BLA-BLAM!!! insert the I'm-so-creepy factor!!! What totally surprises me is that more people didn't take you seriously and post more comments publicly shaming you with righteous indignation. I salute you, sir.

#4, if you are going to correct someone's spelling, you may want to verify that the word you are correcting is indeed actually wrong. Nowhere is absolutely a word & yes ma'am, it is spelled correctly. May I point you to another website & give you unsolicited advice, which flows so freely on FML? m-w.com (as in Merriam-Webster) is a great resource. Perhaps you will want to reference it prior to your next attempt at public shaming based on the use of the English language.

It is considered more proper to use the word 'and' instead of an ampersand in the English language, my dear sir.

I'm not sure who you think I'm correcting, but I can assure you it's no one. You just wasted your time typing up a smartass comment. Maybe next time use your critical thinking skills to recognize that nowhere in the FML or any of the comments prior to me is this word used.

k

You are absolutely correct. However, would you agree that, in certain circumstances, the symbol might be considered appropriate? For instance, when used during informal exchange on an app or website whose acronym is FML or if there are space/character limitations, the ampersand might not only be appropriate, but perhaps even preferred. Great. Now my head hurts. I was told that there would be no math today. Patrón, anyone?

You did it! The word is indeed "nowhere" and you spelled it correctly...in a sentence! See? I DIDN'T waste my time because somebody learned something tonight and I get to take ALL THE CREDIT! I can go to bed feeling like I accomplished something today, all because of you. I am so awesome. I should've been an English Professor. Don't you agree? You did a great job using YOUR critical thinking skills to deduce the fact that I am indeed a smart ass. Unfortunately, you do need to do a little more work on your reading retention skills. I have to point out that #9 (Tripartita, I'm a fan) did use the word nowhere.

I'm sorry but y'all are grammar nazi's. It's some times best to keep your mouth or in this case text bar closed.

I am comment #4 and the person you are pointing out is comment #9. Great deductions, but again, wasted time. Stumped yet?

Oh yeah .. You're really doing your mom the favour by staying away from all those things aren't you. Jeez

"Well at least I don't **** bitches" = "I'm a virgin"

Haha I've used this before!

Great advice!!! The conversation can start off with something like, "Mom, I was eavesdropping on your private conversation..."

Interesting tactic