Food, Addiction and Health: Gotta have it - FML

Gotta have it

By kp. - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I found ants all over my chocolate, but I'm so addicted that I just wiped them off and ate it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 990

You deserved it 59 174

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Same thing different taste

By Funyearahead - 08/08/2016 12:44 - United States - Red Bank

Today, I found out that my new roommate likes to put candy on the floor, let ants crawl all over it, and eats it. Ants and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 682

You deserved it 954

By YeahItsmecoolhuh - 17/02/2011 06:50 - United Arab Emirates

Today, I found a horde of ants in one of my socks when I put it on my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 558

You deserved it 4 987

By dannij08 - 14/01/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I stole one of my cousin's chocolates. I didn't tell her, after I ate it, I read the box and realized that it was a chocolate laxative. I'm posting this from the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 430

You deserved it 43 473

Another resolution bites the dust

By Anonymous - 30/09/2024 00:00 - Germany - Seevetal

Today, I was extremely tired, so when I decided I wanted a snack, I went to the corner of the kitchen where the chocolate is, opened the garbage bin, and reached inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 299

By mary - 21/02/2012 15:33 - Australia

Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 854

You deserved it 9 140

By ChocoMilkManG - 03/07/2009 01:37 - United States

Today, I found some Nesquick Chocolate Milk mix in my pantry which sounded good. While making a glass, I got angry because not all of the mix would disolve. Frustrated, I downed the drink. When I finished I looked in the glass and realized the mix that wouldn't disolve was actually tiny ants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 274

You deserved it 17 992

Sneaky

By Anonymous - 07/10/2019 14:00

Today, after losing a battle with ants in my apartment, I just pulled one off that was biting me in the vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 912

You deserved it 212

By foreveralone - 13/01/2014 01:00 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 241

You deserved it 7 147

Chip on your shoulder

By Anonymous - 28/08/2021 13:59 - United States

Today, I woke up at 2 a.m. and ate some chips that were on my nightstand, totally unaware that they were covered in ants. Now I have two swollen lips and my kid’s birthday party is tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 1 131

By Heyme - 09/12/2008 13:50 - France

Today, I was working and eating. I was so tired that I bit into my pen and smeared my chocolate-filled pastry on my exercise book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 380

You deserved it 6 726

Next

Top comments

Freeze_fml 16

Monday 17 October 2011 8:25

That's disgusting and you should feel disgusting.

captainfalcon7 0

Monday 17 October 2011 8:27

I'm sorry this is just sad

Comments

Okayitwasme 0

Tuesday 18 October 2011 3:51

Fail

Bently24 6

Tuesday 18 October 2011 4:00

So spending less than a dollar on another one wasn't a choice. I guess the ants gave it a nice crunch. That's gross man

Jaws1240 0

Tuesday 18 October 2011 4:23

Was it Hersheys chocolate? Cause i would too! Shit I never waste a good candy bar!

whippymcdumb4zs 0

Tuesday 18 October 2011 4:35

I had that happen with my drugs; but I just wiped them off and smoked them anyways. God I'm so addicted. FML

hateevryone 14

Tuesday 18 October 2011 4:39

seriously, was it that damn great?

Snowbat4u 10

Tuesday 18 October 2011 4:46

It is called: High Protein Chocolate!

anjtrg_1112 23

Tuesday 18 October 2011 4:56

That's why they make candy bugs, OP, and I'm sure they have some in chocolate (:

poprox4life 3

Tuesday 18 October 2011 5:01

It's your own fault...

megan_lovee 0

Tuesday 18 October 2011 5:05

yu have serious problems thts gross nd honestly if yu did tht whhy tell people tht?? lmao well whatever I hope yu atleastt brushed yur teeth after:

MerrikBarbarian 9

Tuesday 18 October 2011 5:11

yummy, extra flavor! well if you ignore the fact that extra zing it actually ant pee. survival 101, when stuck in the woods craving salt and vinegar chips, let ants crawl over some grass then lick it. sounds gross but urine is technically sterile. :p

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 747

You deserved it 3 900

USA, USA, USA, and more precisely Philadelphia. That's where we're landing today. When I first discovered Justin, on 9gag or an awesome website like that, I knew exactly this little guy was perfect to fit in the FML illustrated section. His crazy, c...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

The Top

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed and took the pain medicine that the oral surgeon prescribed for me before bed. The pain actually did go away for the most part, until my stomach decided to betray me and make me throw up, forcing my jaw to open more than it could after surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 699

You deserved it 282

Today, I decided to give my dog a bath. Instead, my dog gave me a bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 992

You deserved it 3 878

Today, I walked past a man handing out miniature Bibles on my way to class. He handed me one, commenting "here, you look like you need this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 742

You deserved it 4 874

Today, I was on my way to work when my ex-wife drove past me in the car she got from me. She fucked me over so hard in the divorce that I have to ride my bike to work while wearing a full suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 161

You deserved it 3 953

Today, I got talking to a really hot guy at a party. He told me that he was only here because he heard the host would sleep with anyone, and he and his buddies had a bet going. It was my party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 738

You deserved it 20 418

Today, I decided I would eat healthy in order to lose weight. Feeling powerful, I threw away all of the icecream in my freezer. An hour later, I picked the icecream carton out of the garbage and ate the entire half-melted carton. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 423

You deserved it 119 173