Food, Addiction and Health: Gotta have it

Gotta have it

By kp. - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I found ants all over my chocolate, but I'm so addicted that I just wiped them off and ate it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 990

You deserved it 59 174

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Same thing different taste

By Funyearahead - 08/08/2016 12:44 - United States - Red Bank

Today, I found out that my new roommate likes to put candy on the floor, let ants crawl all over it, and eats it. Ants and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 682

You deserved it 954

By YeahItsmecoolhuh - 17/02/2011 06:50 - United Arab Emirates

Today, I found a horde of ants in one of my socks when I put it on my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 558

You deserved it 4 987

By dannij08 - 14/01/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I stole one of my cousin's chocolates. I didn't tell her, after I ate it, I read the box and realized that it was a chocolate laxative. I'm posting this from the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 430

You deserved it 43 473

Another resolution bites the dust

By Anonymous - 30/09/2024 00:00 - Germany - Seevetal

Today, I was extremely tired, so when I decided I wanted a snack, I went to the corner of the kitchen where the chocolate is, opened the garbage bin, and reached inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 299

By mary - 21/02/2012 15:33 - Australia

Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 854

You deserved it 9 140

By ChocoMilkManG - 03/07/2009 01:37 - United States

Today, I found some Nesquick Chocolate Milk mix in my pantry which sounded good. While making a glass, I got angry because not all of the mix would disolve. Frustrated, I downed the drink. When I finished I looked in the glass and realized the mix that wouldn't disolve was actually tiny ants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 274

You deserved it 17 992

Sneaky

By Anonymous - 07/10/2019 14:00

Today, after losing a battle with ants in my apartment, I just pulled one off that was biting me in the vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 912

You deserved it 212

By foreveralone - 13/01/2014 01:00 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 241

You deserved it 7 147

Chip on your shoulder

By Anonymous - 28/08/2021 13:59 - United States

Today, I woke up at 2 a.m. and ate some chips that were on my nightstand, totally unaware that they were covered in ants. Now I have two swollen lips and my kid’s birthday party is tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 1 131

By Heyme - 09/12/2008 13:50 - France

Today, I was working and eating. I was so tired that I bit into my pen and smeared my chocolate-filled pastry on my exercise book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 380

You deserved it 6 726

Freeze_fml 16

Monday 17 October 2011 8:25

That's disgusting and you should feel disgusting.

captainfalcon7 0

Monday 17 October 2011 8:27

I'm sorry this is just sad

Comments

nerdsgetmehot 22

Monday 17 October 2011 17:24

That's a little disturbing.

sugarbaby9908 20

Monday 17 October 2011 17:27

Nothing wrong with that, people have ate stranger things b4 :)

mrwiggles5422 4

Monday 17 October 2011 17:46

eww you must me a fat ****... that's why America is well on its way to the the fattest country. you sicken me...

nikloveless 0

Monday 17 October 2011 17:54

fatty

ifeelya 5

Monday 17 October 2011 17:56

should've had ants chocolate covered instead.

Tahmer 0

Monday 17 October 2011 18:39

Ants are one of the most cleanest insects, so there is nothing wrong with that...

Alyta 0

Monday 17 October 2011 18:58

Hey I would do the same! I love chocolate and I know how you feel! Come on guys they werent cockroaches but aunts! Its not a big deal!

SmittyJA24 26

Monday 17 October 2011 19:05

Chocolate-covered-ants ... Ant-covered-chocolate... WTF is the difference???

Gamakichi 0

Monday 17 October 2011 19:38

Just some extra protein!

Amaxwell 0

Monday 17 October 2011 20:15

You are disgusting!

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The Top

Today, I was sleeping because I had been sick. The closest bathroom to mine is the one in my parents room. I wake up and feel like I have to throw up, I run into my parents room to go to the bathroom. I walk in on my parents having sex. Shocked, I gasp for air then throw up all over their bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122 467

You deserved it 13 416

Today, my wife quit her job, not wanting to go back to in person at her office, to be a stay-at-home mom. Tomorrow, for my birthday, I was going to tell her that I'm not in love with her, have found an apartment, and signed a 2-year lease. I can't afford the apartment, mortgage, and the kids' tuition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 611

You deserved it 2 771

The Top

Today, I was supposed to have sex with my ex after he’d been out of town for a week. After a lot of build up and sexting last night, I woke up sick and he hurt his leg. It’s like our bodies are telling us not to sleep together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 2 419

Today, I got fired. To make things worse, I had to sit in three-hour bumper to bumper traffic, waiting for a wreck to clear on my way home. In front of me was a fat man with a hairy butt crack on a motorcycle. I was forced to stare at a fat, underwear-less man's ass for 3 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 234

You deserved it 3 939

Today, after I broke up with my boyfriend about two weeks ago, I didn't think much of it since we haven't spoken, I went out on a date last night with an old friend, came back home and went to sleep… When I got up for work, I went out to my car to find someone had egged it. It still won't come off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 862

You deserved it 128

Today, after a particularly difficult late night workout at the gym, I decided to shower in the locker room. I must have passed out, because I later woke up naked, surrounded by police after someone called to report a dead body in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 629

You deserved it 3 273

Today, in an effort to look more professional at work, I wore high heels. My boss decided today would be a great day for me to walk around on the sidewalk holding a sign to advertise instead of doing the job I was hired for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 747

You deserved it 2 370

Today, my boyfriend of five years finally gave me a ring. Oh no, not an engagement ring. He gave me a ring "to apologize for sleeping with his married coworker." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 515

You deserved it 183