Family, Weird, Relatable and Geek: It's a conspiracy! - FML

It's a conspiracy!

By Help - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my family dragged me to an Alien-themed museum. They're convinced they were once abducted and felt up by creatures from outer space. They talk, and spend all their money, on nothing else. I'm hungry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 751

You deserved it 2 982

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Top comments

allinicolesmh 0

Sunday 14 August 2011 8:50

Ask your leader to make you a sandwich then..

jumpshot23 0

Sunday 14 August 2011 8:49

Time for someone to go beyond the final frontier and get a job!

Comments

Marquelle53 0

Monday 15 August 2011 3:10

Better find some alien food

smileydancer92 2

Monday 15 August 2011 3:39

wrong fml lol

Felivi 9

Monday 15 August 2011 17:50

I kind of wish I was, aliens probably know how to have a good time. Listen to #71 though and best of luck.

Imgonnahaveabf 9

Tuesday 16 August 2011 4:06

NBD.

crashley21 10

Tuesday 16 August 2011 22:21

It sucks that they think that and you have to put up with it, but maybe you should get a job? Quit complaining you're hungry when you buy your own food. And it'll get you time away from them.

Devyn333 16

Friday 19 August 2011 6:59

Ugh bad grammar

ChelseaGrin112 14

Sunday 22 April 2012 16:24

I bet you Katy Perry's jealous of them.

SkoomaKi 27

Sunday 13 May 2012 18:07

Dress up as an alien and scare them!

Fmlano 16

Sunday 18 November 2012 1:11

Is your last name by any chance 'Tyler'?

MzZombicidal 36

Tuesday 2 July 2013 2:40

I have a feeling your parents met at a ScyFi convention.

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Keywords

AITA Awkward First Dates Love Dogs Animals Cute Am I overreacting? Alcohol Food Health Relatable Thanksgiving Politics Family Holidays Miscellaneous Transportation Cars Sex Intimacy Contraception Cheating Suspicious Poopoo peepee Kids Gross Accident Gifts Birthday

The Top

Today, at 6 a.m. I rolled over in bed causing my smartwatch to vibrate with an alert that it had detected a hard fall. Ten seconds after I dismissed the alert, I heard a voice from my watch with the dreaded words, "911, what's your emergency?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 127

Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 14 098

The Top

Today, I went with my friends to see a movie. I handed my student card over to the cashier as proof I was old enough to see it, and he started laughing hysterically at my picture. Then he called over a colleague, who also started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 075

You deserved it 3 016

Today was just like any other normal day. Spent the day cleaning the house from top to bottom. I felt great until I went into just about every room I’d cleaned and saw that it was messed up again with zero attempts from my stepdaughter to clean it back up. I really hate preteens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 021

You deserved it 315

Today, I made salmon patties and boiled cabbage. I smelled smoke from my stove burner, but thought I spilled something in the burner. No big deal. Later, this horrible smell started coming from the stove. My husband took the stove apart, only to find that I had fried a mouse as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 498

You deserved it 4 079

Today, sun was shining and I felt confident enough to go sunbathing at the beach. In only my bikini and towel, I laid out to get some sun. A while later, a little girl came up to me and said, "Aren't you embarrassed that you're so huge?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 522

You deserved it 11 262

Today, I want on a date with a man I met on the internet. While talking over drinks, I asked him what he did for a living. He said he was a salesman, and that he's really good at it. Interested, I asked him what it was he sold. "Cannabis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 926

You deserved it 1 735

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he tried to put his hand inside my pants. I didn't want it to be that easy so I denied, but he insisted a lot and I finally let him. He started to sing "We Are The Champions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 950

You deserved it 24 363