Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: It's sus to us

It's sus to us

By inder - 25/02/2011 16:03 - United Kingdom

Today, while having sex, I found out that I'm so flexible that when I bend over backwards, the backs of my knees can touch my shoulders. My boyfriend is now extremely jealous and is debating about breaking up with me. Even I don't get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 859

You deserved it 4 753

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Same thing different taste

Leaking

By noname - 22/09/2010 05:37 - Canada

Today, I discovered that if I put my ankles on my boyfriend's shoulders while we are having sex, I will pee myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 552

You deserved it 13 821

By Anonymous - 01/08/2012 09:02 - United States

Today, I discovered that the only reason my husband is taking yoga classes with me is because he wants to be flexible enough to suck his own rod. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 726

You deserved it 6 595

By sheyshey0413 - 13/06/2011 17:05 - United States

Today, I realized that my boyfriend will only have sex with me if I am on my stomach and not revealing my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 043

You deserved it 6 941

Better safe

By stretchy - 06/05/2013 19:58 - United States - Bethesda

Today, my boyfriend forced me to do stretching exercises with him before and after sex as a "safety precaution". FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 676

You deserved it 9 354

By dickofbrokendreams - 02/03/2015 05:14 - United States - Waynesville

Today, I discovered that my fiancé consistently thinks about his fear of breaking his penis while we have sex. He's afraid to have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 022

You deserved it 3 479

By geewhy - 26/12/2012 21:20 - United States - South Park

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 708

You deserved it 5 439

By Anonymous - 22/03/2013 23:21 - Canada - Oakville

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 410

You deserved it 19 275

By fungettingdressed - 12/10/2010 12:57 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 939

You deserved it 9 090

By Darcy - 26/10/2011 06:58 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 570

You deserved it 4 582

By Anonymous - 07/11/2010 22:00 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 960

You deserved it 6 539

jasonf00 1

Friday 25 February 2011 18:57

Um, she did say "backwards" so giving herself oral still isn't happening.

tcharbs 0

Friday 25 February 2011 19:03

what an idiot flexibility=tons of hot positions you should find a guy with an emotional age over 5

Comments

BringYourOwnBomb 0

Saturday 26 February 2011 5:24

You definitely have a gift! He doesn't know what he'll be missing if he dumps you! FYL.

thomkat 0

Saturday 26 February 2011 5:50

chicks don't need to use their own tongues to please themselves. unlike most guys we know where it's good

flammenhund 4

Saturday 26 February 2011 7:40

I did :$

sunnysurfchick 0

Saturday 26 February 2011 8:00

jealous? WTF for? that is so stupid

kurai88 4

Saturday 26 February 2011 8:34

so in your opinion, oh wisest of scholars, it should be "you're either more stupid than I", huh? wow, your parents (and indeed your English teacher) should be so proud. If you had just made that mistake, i wouldn't care, but since you tried to "correct" someone, i really do insist on laughing at your idiocy till i cry. #75 was right, it is "more stupid than me" (or "stupider than me") please, for the love of all that is good, don't try to school someone in grammar if you only have a very basic grasp of it yourself.

richmurrills 0

Saturday 26 February 2011 8:43

How you doin'? :)

drunkinstl 0

Saturday 26 February 2011 8:45

if you were mine, you wouldn't have to do shit for the rest of your life

xgetxbentx 13

Saturday 26 February 2011 9:13

eh, move on and find a man who can appreciate your flexability in the bedroom. or you could join the circus. either one would work.

Kehaulani1994 0

Saturday 26 February 2011 9:53

haha I can do that too ^.^ but to the back of my head... it hurts like a bitch after tho. hmmm it's weird that he's jealous... is it becAuse he wants am awesome and sexy talent too?