Love, Sex and Intimacy: Let's get it on

Let's get it on

By Frank - 17/08/2011 06:50 - United States

Today, I came home from work tired and horny, and asked my girlfriend if she wanted to go make love. While all she had done all day is lay on the couch and watch television, she said, "I'm too tired, why don't you just go into the bathroom and grab a quick wank." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 057

You deserved it 6 456

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Same thing different taste

Can't win

By Anonymous - 24/09/2019 22:00

Today, I was in the mood for morning sex, but my wife told me to go wank it off in the bathroom. Three minutes later I was mid-wank when she started banging on the door because I was taking too long, and she needed to pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 161

You deserved it 363

By Username - 18/03/2010 08:21 - France

Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 585

You deserved it 49 799

Don't you want me baby?

By Ugh - 05/12/2024 21:00 - Romania

Today, I was dead tired and just wanted sleep, so I jumped into bed the second the day's chores were done. Of fucking course, this was the day my fiancée decided to end our eight-week dry spell and came in wearing sexy lingerie. I couldn't stay hard due to exhaustion, and now she's been crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 287

You deserved it 84

Bad timing

By Anonymous - 23/06/2022 14:00

Today, I got home and I was feeling horny so I leapt on my boyfriend, except he had just got home from a 16-hour day and was too tired. After his nap, he was horny but by that time I was way too tired and no longer horny. This is ridiculous, we can’t even get laid even though we live together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 389

You deserved it 373

By BlueBallMcGee - 11/05/2009 12:08 - United States

Today, I came home from working twelve hours straight. Feeling rather frisky, I attempted to seduce my wife upon arriving home. She said that sleep was better than sex and went directly to bed. It was only 6:30 PM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 766

You deserved it 7 039

Wait

By Anonymous - 20/07/2022 22:00

Today my wife told me she really wanted to have sex, and to wait in bed while she got ready. Turns out get ready means do the dishes, feed the dogs, clean the cat's litter tray, phone her sister, make coffee, shower, and wait for the dryer to dry her pyjamas. By the time she got in bed, I'd fallen asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 467

You deserved it 1 087

By Velian - 09/12/2008 08:59 - France

Today, I began to undress my wife, who was watching TV, and gave her a massage to relax her while she watched her soap. 20 minutes later, when the programme came to an end, she said "I wish you'd let me watch TV in peace!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 651

You deserved it 4 734

By hannieannie - 09/02/2016 21:51 - United Kingdom - Oxford

Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 379

You deserved it 3 124

Romance is dead

By Anonymous - 10/10/2022 18:30 - Turkey

Today, my girlfriend and I haven't had sex for a long time, so when she got out of the shower I was ready on our bed to finally do it. Her response? "Really? Now? I just got out of the shower." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 504

You deserved it 492

Waste of time

By I'mmessedup - 29/09/2021 22:59

Today, after weeks of every excuse not to, my wife wanted sex. It was amazing, and she had at least 3 orgasms. Instead of cuddling afterwards, she got up like someone kicked her and started bitching about all the things she could have been doing, as she got dressed and stormed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 152

You deserved it 538

abes22 0

Wednesday 17 August 2011 11:51

should have asked her to come help you..

jasminea 0

Wednesday 17 August 2011 11:54

show her how tired she really is (;

Comments

kruschev33 0

Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:31

Dump her she is clearly just using her for money like many women do

thew_fml 14

Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:46

have a wank. on the couch next to her. if she doesn't enjoy watching it, and maybe join in, think about finding someone who will

tiggyt 2

Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:50

Ew,asking for sex is such a turn off. Who the f wants to have sex as a favour? Seriously, what grown-up ASKS for sex? Fellas, NEVER do this. If you want it, signal it by flirting outrageously and subtly petting your OH to pique her interest- way sexier, so sex will frequently follow. Duh YDI. Loser.

tiggyt 2

Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:51

tiggyt 2

Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:54

Oops sorry bout the double post, silly mobile site

MoutainDrewski 0

Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:54

dude.. she's probably cheating on you, set up a spy cam before confronting her

ForestFire0 1

Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:55

"Make love"? Are you a woman, or a character from a romantic comedy? Because I really don't see any other options

mikejunior88 4

Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:57

You're not supposed to ask a woman if she wants to have sex. Using the term "make love" doesn't make it better either. You're supposed to get her into the mood, or at least try to. Also understand that no means no, and she doesn't have to have a valid reason either. You act like she doesn't have the right to say no, man. I'm a guy and I'm taking her side. I never treat women the way you treated yours, bro. YDI.