Farts, Cute and Love: Love is…

Love is…

By gassygirlfriend - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Nampa

Today, I was spooning with my girlfriend. She fell asleep and spent the next 15 minutes farting on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 371

You deserved it 5 275

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Same thing different taste

By hotboxed - 13/07/2019 18:30

Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 611

You deserved it 393

By pikachu - 20/01/2009 20:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 580

You deserved it 4 540

By Big Baby - 28/01/2017 00:00

Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 455

You deserved it 809

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 112

You deserved it 41 514

By steve-o - 14/02/2019 15:46 - United States

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 915

You deserved it 4 195

The language of love

By disgusted - 24/09/2012 19:16 - United Kingdom - Harpenden

Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 928

You deserved it 6 526

Ouch!

By P0wned - 29/09/2009 21:21 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 981

You deserved it 5 274

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 315

You deserved it 5 073

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 15:23 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 882

You deserved it 11 310

By Wow - 11/04/2013 12:52 - United States

Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while watching TV. I thought it would be cute to try to kiss him awake like they do in the movies. He farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 253

You deserved it 19 307

StickyPickles 33

Sunday 10 May 2015 19:03

Now that's love.

Cassandra2015 21

Sunday 10 May 2015 19:13

your a dedicated spooner .

Comments

cari_cat 19

Monday 11 May 2015 1:12

To be fair to her she probably holds in so much when she's awake around you!

YFOS_fml 17

Monday 11 May 2015 1:28

well you didn't move!

missclm 1

Monday 11 May 2015 2:18

YDI cause you make her feel like she has to hold them in around you.

clairesucks 37

Monday 11 May 2015 3:01

Oh well, a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do

YourAdopted69 2

Monday 11 May 2015 3:12

love is in the air, oh wait never mind it's just farts

themeraiser 0

Monday 11 May 2015 4:34

Le lol

coolkidmcgoo 14

Monday 11 May 2015 4:50

I had to jump on and comment and say hey to someone else from Idaho

AssassinD3 19

Monday 11 May 2015 5:08

And people say romance is dead.

Freelman 7

Monday 11 May 2015 5:39

Ahh the feel of love and the smell of methane. Both inseparable

zenrael 21

Monday 11 May 2015 6:08

Many presents for when she forgets she is in your presence.

Keywords

Love Party Lonely Awkward ADHD Transportation Cars Ironic Vacation Work Mental health Miscellaneous Grandparents Accident Covid Health Kids Annoying Cute Shopping Coworkers Dogs Animals Photography Art Videos Exhausted Sex Intimacy Money

The Top

Today, I had a consultation for an upcoming surgery I need done. The doctor (who is very handsome and in his late twenties) asked me to flex my stomach and act like I was trying to use the bathroom. As I was enjoying him touching my stomach, I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 998

You deserved it 8 644

Today, I went looking for a childhood doll - I remembered that my mum kept her in her bedside cabinet. I could see the doll at the back, but there was stuff in the way, so I reached in and took some of it out, only to find I was holding one of my mum's toys… a big black rubber cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 242

You deserved it 6 977

The Top

Today, I saw a car on the side on the highway with a popped tire. The driver didn't have a spare, so I nicely gave them mine. One hour later my tire popped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 839

You deserved it 8 064

Today, I was going through different social media sites, laughing at the people from high school who’d either gotten fat or divorced or anything of the sort. Then I realized how sad it was to search out and still laugh at people from high school. I need to move on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 1 733

Today, I got home from work, took a shower, got ready for bed, and laid down right in cat piss. Now I'm shampooing the mattress and taking another shower just to sleep on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 892

You deserved it 419

Today, I saw a girl wearing a Nirvana shirt. Since Nirvana has been my favorite band for a long time, I tried striking up a conversation with her. Turns out she doesn't even listen to them, and only bought the shirt because she "liked the smiley face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 945

You deserved it 5 613

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 162

You deserved it 10 940

Today, my 81-year-old mother threw out the packaging for a 3-day-old $1,700 monitor I was going to return due to a defect. I live in my own home, but she randomly visits to "clean up" without asking me. Now I'm stuck with an expensive, defective monitor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 617

You deserved it 692

Love is…

Same thing different taste

The language of love

Ouch!

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