Painful, Bikes and Kids: Nature is harsh

Nature is harsh

By fallsdownplenty45 - 02/06/2009 11:08 - Taiwan

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 933

You deserved it 6 759

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Same thing different taste

I want to ride my bicycle

By Anonymous - 27/06/2021 14:02

Today, I decided to ride my bike for the first time in over a year. It was seemingly going well, until I got to the first hill. As I began to ascend, I was trying a bit to hard and shit my pants, 8 kilometers away from my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 880

You deserved it 301

By cathugger - 13/07/2019 16:30

Today, while hurrying by bike to an appointment, my chain broke. I quickly got off the road and managed to fix it on the sidewalk, covering my hands in black smear. Dirty but confident about my repair skills, I got up. A second later, felt something warm running down my neck. Bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 928

You deserved it 130

By SmellyLeg - 20/11/2017 15:00

Today, my bike slipped on ice and I slid spectacularly for several meters. While my helmet saved me from a cracked skull, nothing could protect me from landing leg-first in the dog poop somebody hadn't bothered to pick up. I had to go to school like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 325

You deserved it 323

Biking

By OMGWTF - 13/08/2009 02:01 - United States

Today, while biking home from work, a 12 mile trip, I was speeding down a long hill and my jean pant leg got caught in the chain. It ripped, and then the rest of my pant leg ripped off. I had to bike 10 more miles half naked along the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 144

You deserved it 6 148

By me - 11/11/2010 18:11 - United States

Today, my friend and I were racing on our bicycles when my chain snapped. I went over the handlebars and slid, on my back, for about ten feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 281

You deserved it 4 902

By Lawrence - 06/08/2009 04:55 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike to the local grocery store to pick up some supplies for dinner. On the way down, traveling down a hill, I hit a drain with no lid. I went to grab hold of the nearest object to soften my fall. That nearest object was a barbed wire fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 686

You deserved it 3 740

Don't mind me

By Moon-chan - 30/06/2019 00:30 - Netherlands

Today, I was cycling home. On the way, my laces got stuck in the bicycle pedals and I couldn't move the foot that got stuck. The bicycle fell over, with me attached to it. Everyone was looking at me like, "What are you doing?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 536

You deserved it 355

**** the environment

By Anonymous - 02/12/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I was trying to be environmentally friendly by riding my BMX to work. My 'rad skills' are out of whack because I hit a pothole, fell off, and landed in a pile of trash bags that were dumped by the side of the road. The irony wasn’t lost on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 137

By maybenot - 06/08/2012 23:25 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 828

You deserved it 29 952

Like an animal

By limeychefboy - 23/02/2018 01:30

Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home, in the middle of nowhere, when I needed to poop, so I found a wooded area and did my thing. As I was climbing back up, I knocked my helmet from its perch and watched it roll right into what I’d just left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 731

You deserved it 2 269

poolshark 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:17

You might want to look into a tetanus shot and some antibiotics... feces and open wounds do not mix.

padlarf 14

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:09

Holy shit man!

Comments

Noobpwner 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:27

#22 No one gives a shit about you either. To the OP, that sucks hard. Hopefully you're alright and you really should go to the doctors...

FYourSEXLYFE 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:31

#23 "To the OP, that sucks hard" LOL FAG FTL

ohhhhshizzz 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:31

#22: Then you go ******* moderate this, jackass. OP: Rofl, lmaoo. :] I hope you are okay, and go to the doctor.

Random_lurker12 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:32

Yeek, that is once bad bike riding experience. ._. Wait, so did your bike fall into the sewage or did you just fall?

Katzilla_dances 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:33

#19 WIN

BILMAN 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:33

oh really? your sock got caught in the chain and your bike flipped over?! yaaa thats really believable! PHAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ledz3pp3lin78 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:33

Penis

MrJentipede 2

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:35

If this is true, you are gonna have some serious health issues if that sewage got into your system through abrasions or cuts.

GMSD213 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:37

you should definitely visit the hospital. Poop+open wounds=DEATH! :0

gsx 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:37

Thats a crappy day, haha couldn't help it

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Argument Ironic Friends Awkward Haircut Cute Holidays Lonely Relatable Capitalism Work Bosses You're fired Cars Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, I was working a concert ticket booth. A lady gave me her ticket, I punched it, and told her to enjoy the show. She asked for the “hotel.” Apparently, she thought that the concert ticket cost included a hotel stay, since she traveled from out of state. She cussed me out and had to be escorted out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 333

You deserved it 76

Today, I put my sexiest lingerie on, lit candles, put some sensual music on, and got my bed ready to surprise my boyfriend when he came home. I positioned myself in the sexiest pose possible. He came home and didn't come in my room for twenty minutes because of a football game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 148

You deserved it 6 979

The Top

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but in fact, it wasn’t her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 297

You deserved it 270

Today, my boyfriend forgot to pick our son up from daycare. His excuse? Fighting in a battle in World of Warcraft was far more important and he had to stay absolutely focused. Our son had to wait for two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 096

You deserved it 5 146

Today, I realized that my husband has a video games addiction. I am currently pregnant; he brought us to the same country he's in so we can finally live together, only for me to witness him being glued to his laptop all day and all night playing WoW. He's forgotten I even existed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 629

You deserved it 5 919

Today, while watching a family movie, my mother made every effort to make sure I covered my eyes during a kissing scene. I guess it shouldn't be a surprise, since she still forces me to put my phone in her room every night as she makes me go to bed at 8:30 PM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 715

You deserved it 3 639

Today, my fiancée and I were selecting our wedding cake. The wedding is now off since I refused to buy her the "dream" wedding cake she wanted because it was chocolate. She called me childish and cheap. I'm highly allergic to chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 305

You deserved it 3 616

Today, I learned that a innie belly button does not clean itself. I can't begin to describe the horrors I found, after using tweezers to get thirty years worth of "contents" out from inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 256

You deserved it 1 489

Nature is harsh

Same thing different taste

I want to ride my bicycle

Biking

Don't mind me

**** the environment

Like an animal

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