Love: Self report

Self report

By SmoothTalker - 16/03/2009 17:40 - United States

Today, I had a meeting with my super-hot TA. When I got to her office, she complimented me for being early, to which I thoughtfully replied, "Oh, I usually come early." She laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 328

You deserved it 33 942

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Same thing different taste

By babbling idiot - 14/08/2015 09:35 - Canada

Today, I approached a hot female security guard and attempted to compliment her new tattoos. Instead of saying, "Nice tats", I ended up saying, "Nice tits". My HR meeting is tomorrow morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 475

You deserved it 9 674

Mean Girls

By 1nfected - 26/08/2009 17:07 - Canada

Today, when I arrived at work, I was greeted by my gorgeous coworker telling me my red shirt looked awesome on me. Before I could compliment her, she added that the color was fitting perfectly with my acne. I heard a couple of giggles around me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 415

You deserved it 3 637

By EmployeeOfTheMonth - 27/06/2009 07:03 - United States

Today, my attractive boss sat me down in the break room to say how much she appreciated how much work I've been doing despite being a temp. She was wearing a skirt, and I couldn't take my eyes off her legs. She then patted me on the leg and said "Good Talk". It wasn't my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 820

You deserved it 19 224

By fatty - 14/08/2014 03:46 - United States - Madison

Today, I was chatting with the cute new receptionist at the gym. I told her that I would be going there more if she was there. She looked me up and down and said that I should go regardless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 369

You deserved it 15 870

Hopeless

By Dumbdumb - 15/02/2010 14:29 - United States

Today, at work, a really hot guy came up to me and asked, "What are your hours?" Excited, I told him I get off at 4, but might be able to get out sooner. He started laughing and then said, "I meant your store hours." He turned around and walked away, shaking his head and laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 722

You deserved it 33 243

By Anonymous - 01/10/2010 11:48 - United States

Today, as I was leaving the office, I heard my very cute coworker behind me say "Hey gorgeous, where are you off to?" I turned around with a smile and said "About to hit up happy hour." He was on the phone with his wife. I'm calling in sick tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 479

You deserved it 12 217

Wrong target

By footinmouth - 21/01/2009 23:15 - United States

Today, I was hitting on a girl who was getting ready to walk into the same class as me. We were waiting outside the room, so I told her that I'd heard the professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down at a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 917

You deserved it 38 835

Thanks Susan

By Noname - 24/02/2009 23:00 - United States

Today, I got up early and really put some extra effort into my appearance to catch the eye of a cute guy at work. I walked in and the woman who sits at the desk beside me looks over and says, "Wow, are you sick? You're not looking too good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 293

You deserved it 4 929

Suck up

By Anonymous - 22/08/2015 06:58 - United States - Cadillac

Today, I showed up to my new job early, hoping to impress my new boss. When he arrived, he walked by me and muttered, "Fucking tryhard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 795

You deserved it 3 418

By Anonymous - 17/10/2013 13:43 - United States - Romulus

Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 841

You deserved it 4 736

vonstrangle 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 0:15

"Today someone had a sense of humor and I didn't. FML"

vietiscool 2

Tuesday 17 March 2009 0:05

it's ok. funny joke.

Comments

krazinluvv 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 0:18

that's what she said!!!

musicfanboy33 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 0:18

that's hecka funny but that sucks for you. May i direct you to the link of a music video that describes that perfectly?

Gabriel_fml 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 0:21

I don't get it :(

IamSpartacus 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 9:03

Lol.

alexnoyle 12

Monday 16 July 2012 5:05

Hahahahaha

LaLaLaurenn 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 0:21

wait, so you mean the teacher assistant right? so like, youre the teacher? or youre a student? im confused. at my highschool the seniors get to be TAs...?

mf_fml 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 0:22

not really a fml, just some self-deprecating flirting. haha, or is that just me? ****.

Eternity_fml 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 0:24

Yeah, how is this a FML? It would be if you were like, "I got Skittles in my mouth. Wanna taste the rainbow?" And she says, "Uhh... no? Please get out of my room and we'll discuss this matter tomorrow."