Kids, Babies and Party: Showered

Showered

By stew - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, it took me more than four hours to set up the back yard for my daughter's baby shower. It only took my husband one push of a button to turn on the sprinklers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 521

You deserved it 3 979

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Same thing different taste

By Rainman - 14/06/2009 20:39 - United States

Today, I had to water my entire garden. After an exhausting hour of watering hundreds of plants, I turned off the hose and started to feel good about the grueling job. That is, until it started pouring rain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 833

You deserved it 14 312

By how - 25/07/2013 04:10 - United States - Crozier

Today, my husband managed to set fire to half of our garden setting up mosquito repellents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 153

You deserved it 3 394

Kids will be kids

By Anonymous - 20/08/2011 14:08 - United States

Today, my 4 year-old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 834

You deserved it 8 678

By Deconstructed - 19/05/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping by our backyard pool. Ready for a shower, I stripped naked, opened the back door to let the dog out, and stepped out to ask him how it was going. Turns out he'd finally hired a landscaping crew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 101

You deserved it 27 999

One man and his lawn

By Anonymous - 14/09/2021 16:00 - United States - Little Rock

Today, my husband, who rarely helps with big projects around the house, offered to help me with our mess of a backyard. An hour and a half into the project, and an hour and a half after he disappeared from the backyard, I found him mowing and edging the front. Our front yard was immaculate and didn't need mowed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 130

By anon - 20/07/2011 07:55 - Canada

Today, my neighbor finally cut the grass on his front lawn. At 2 in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 973

You deserved it 3 346

Pesky kids

By Kyle - 03/12/2013 06:09 - United States - Seattle

Today, I set up a motion-activated sprinkler to drench the neighborhood kids who have been ding dong ditching me for years. Because they couldn't get close enough to ring the doorbell, they decided to start egging me instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 330

You deserved it 6 962

Full support

By Anonymous - 18/10/2023 15:00

Today, my wife invited 45+ people to her baby shower, but literally 4 people came. Now I get to deal with my pregnant wife and her fluctuating hormones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 745

You deserved it 198

By yrfavweapon - 02/07/2010 19:29 - United States

Today, after two hours, I finally got my very cranky, sick baby to fall asleep. Five minutes later, a neighbor started shooting off fireworks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 525

You deserved it 3 879

Noooooo!

By brrrr that's cold! - 27/01/2011 20:24 - United States

Today, I finally felt well enough to take an actual shower after having surgery on my back. It took five minutes to stand up, ten minutes to get to the shower, and another ten minutes to get in. The pilot light went out in less than five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 734

You deserved it 2 411

my_fml_account 2

Tuesday 23 June 2009 23:08

Guess he took 'baby SHOWER' literally.

PositiveChillout 0

Tuesday 23 June 2009 23:00

Ooo Could he not have forseen that water and decorations don't mix?!?!?

Comments

BBkid 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 3:24

What? That sucks thats y my dad always looks out there b4hand

RatIsKing 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 23:37

that's y it's called a baby SHOWER

MURPHYCHACHO 5

Thursday 15 October 2009 22:28

I hope you allowed the man to at least say goodbye to his genitals before you removed them.

HottAznChick 0

Sunday 3 January 2010 7:49

lame u leave it for guys to mess it up

Poepiepiesie 3

Wednesday 21 July 2010 1:27

Next time: think.

sexiilittlething 6

Sunday 5 December 2010 8:31

men are stupid

Chocolate_Chunk 2

Thursday 16 June 2011 9:00

says the sexist that can't even spell "sexy" in the username.

candycane101 0

Tuesday 14 June 2011 2:41

oufff..

Lillias_fml 19

Tuesday 14 August 2012 20:11

Maybe it was an accident... We can never know.

Eltobak 13

Friday 9 May 2014 20:07

Well atleast u love him until death do u apart

awesomeamandas 37

Tuesday 2 September 2014 2:54

this reminds me of the rugrats when they have a baby shower and the sprinklers go off or something.

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Gross Animals Cats Awkward Smells Love Miscellaneous Embarrassing Painful Health First Dates Work Christmas Grieving Social Media Music Boredom Anniversary Intimacy Abuse Ironic AITA Am I overreacting? Transportation Alcohol Drunk Gun control Kids Parents

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 789

You deserved it 3 968

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 084

You deserved it 410

The Top

Today, my boss showed me how he wants his office redecorating. We have employees on minimum wage and yet he wants a private bathroom, large screen TV, sofa and PlayStation, and a decorative suit of armour, all in an office that’s already bigger than my one bedroom flat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 94

Today, my teenage stepdaughter wrecked her third car texting and driving. I’ve pleaded with my husband to stop buying her new ones and to revoke her driving privileges. He’s so desperate for her to love him that he’ll give her literally anything. I’m scared she’s going to get someone killed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 918

You deserved it 174

Today, a colleague crashed a drone into my almost brand new car. I even asked him before if it was OK to park there or if I should better park somewhere else, and he said, "No problem" and bragged about being the best drone pilot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 903

You deserved it 128

Today, I had to go to the hospital because I broke my leg in a sex accident. The doctor is my boyfriend's mom. I had to explain everything to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 749

You deserved it 622

Today, I took part in a raffle that was being organised in the small countryside village where I'm vacationing. I live in big city. I won a duck. A real, live duck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 67

Today, I went to switch my phone number to a new carrier. During the credit check, I was told that I couldn't because I already had an active account. This came as a surprise, as I've never had an account with that carrier. Time to file a fraud claim. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 263

You deserved it 187