Intimacy: Smooth

Smooth

By sopathetic - 26/02/2009 04:09 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around. I was sitting up on my bed when he reached down near my privates and said, "Wow babe, did you shave today? It's so soft…" He was actually touching my bottom roll above my vagina, which delightfully formed a crease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 035

You deserved it 22 064

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

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Same thing different taste

By megaladon - 28/06/2010 08:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 891

You deserved it 37 458

A little higher, dude

By Anonymous - 04/04/2022 14:00

Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 523

By Sugao - 10/12/2008 07:48 - France

Today, during foreplay with my boyfriend, I put my legs around his neck. He pushed them away violently, shouting, "Bloody hell, it's prickling me!" I'd shaved the day before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 077

You deserved it 7 636

Baby Got Back

By backfat - 18/05/2018 01:44

Today, while in bed, my fiancé rolled over in the dark and complimented me on my nice buttocks. He had actually grabbed a roll of back fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 691

You deserved it 1 099

Beauty standards

By Anonymous - 08/05/2023 03:00

Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 684

You deserved it 524

So hot

By bonesniffer - 16/09/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 827

You deserved it 6 059

By Anonymous - 27/10/2010 06:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 692

You deserved it 6 404

By marsbar - 15/03/2009 05:07 - United States

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was moving his hand from his thigh to my chest but on the way he sort of squeezed my stomach. When I asked him why he did that, he told me that "his fingers got stuck under my roll." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 735

You deserved it 20 103

Mr Clean

By Anonymous - 18/01/2013 10:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 269

You deserved it 7 595

By BarbieKen - 14/06/2009 04:14 - United States

Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me I spread my legs to help out then he looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 139

You deserved it 63 337

vitamin_f 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 13:25

Why does it crease vertically in the middle like a vulva does? That's what I don't understand, lol.

itsfuntobesexy 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 12:33

That's disgusting.

Comments

hoch449 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 4:02

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!

simplydevine 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 21:37

ouch!

chaotic_irony 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 21:03

i would lose some weight..a lot if your fat is doing that. your life is ****** up and im sorry

liinkinparkfan97 34

Monday 5 December 2016 4:50

Grow the hell up. Telling someone their life is f'ed up because they're over weight is messed up. I feel sorry for you if that's your way of thinking.

jsmith1199 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 19:41

ew.. lose some weight

Booyah666 0

Monday 30 March 2009 22:12

WHO CARES IF A CHICK IS FAT!!! GROW UP PPL! I mean seriously, if it was you ppl who were overweight (NOT FAT) then you would be a little more sensitive to ppl who are in fact a little overweight. Some ppl don't understand the humiliation of being called fat until they've experienced it. So please, try to be a little nicer to people who have a little more junk in the trunk then you. It is very hard to lose weight if your genetically predisposed to gain weight, Some of you people are mean and should go die in a dirty hole. Hun....don't lose any weight. Your fine the way you are. P.s: I hope everyone learns something from this.

jsmith1199 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 4:45

#76.. someone's sensitive about their weight.. now, by "dirty hole," do you mean your ****** or your mom's? because they're both big enough that my entire body can fit into. but then again, so is your belly button grow up, fatty (notice i said FATTY.. not overweighty) BOOYAH

rednals 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 23:54

to #76 STFU if you seriously have a proublem with peoples coments write a FML. any way lawl i laughed so hard.haha.

kathira120 3

Friday 24 April 2009 21:27

So wait....basically, you're telling us your overweight, and your fat belly DROOPS to your...privates...? Ugh...i'm still laughing though, even though that is DISGUSTING hahaha

kittylitter159 3

Wednesday 6 May 2009 23:43

Okay. First off, you don't have to be "fat" to have a roll. Being overweight makes you have the same thing. Yea, I'm overweight. I'm no where near fat, but I'm not tiny either. Having a metabolism is very important to stay skinny. I agree with some people about saying that this was indeed a nasty FML. I really didn't expect that. But that doesn't change the fact that some of you people are horrible. You can diet and exercise for years and still not be able to get rid of that pudge. It's a known fact. If you have a problem with people like that, then turn the other way.