Intimacy: Smooth

Smooth

By sopathetic - 26/02/2009 04:09 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around. I was sitting up on my bed when he reached down near my privates and said, "Wow babe, did you shave today? It's so soft…" He was actually touching my bottom roll above my vagina, which delightfully formed a crease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 035

You deserved it 22 064

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By megaladon - 28/06/2010 08:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 891

You deserved it 37 458

A little higher, dude

By Anonymous - 04/04/2022 14:00

Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 523

By Sugao - 10/12/2008 07:48 - France

Today, during foreplay with my boyfriend, I put my legs around his neck. He pushed them away violently, shouting, "Bloody hell, it's prickling me!" I'd shaved the day before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 077

You deserved it 7 636

Baby Got Back

By backfat - 18/05/2018 01:44

Today, while in bed, my fiancé rolled over in the dark and complimented me on my nice buttocks. He had actually grabbed a roll of back fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 691

You deserved it 1 099

Beauty standards

By Anonymous - 08/05/2023 03:00

Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 684

You deserved it 524

So hot

By bonesniffer - 16/09/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 827

You deserved it 6 059

By Anonymous - 27/10/2010 06:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 692

You deserved it 6 404

By marsbar - 15/03/2009 05:07 - United States

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was moving his hand from his thigh to my chest but on the way he sort of squeezed my stomach. When I asked him why he did that, he told me that "his fingers got stuck under my roll." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 735

You deserved it 20 103

Mr Clean

By Anonymous - 18/01/2013 10:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 269

You deserved it 7 595

By BarbieKen - 14/06/2009 04:14 - United States

Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me I spread my legs to help out then he looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 139

You deserved it 63 337

vitamin_f 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 13:25

Why does it crease vertically in the middle like a vulva does? That's what I don't understand, lol.

itsfuntobesexy 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 12:33

That's disgusting.

Comments

rachelforgot2 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 21:31

#42 smoking has nothing to do with her roll fat! dont you think that is just fucken obvious, those facts you told us? wow laugh a lil at her F**** life! isnt that why we read these things! btw very funny, not sorry to hear! hope he found the jack pot though!!!

soccrbeast93 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 23:27

FCKINGGGG HILARIOUS i was laughin for at least 5 minutes

Fox01v 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 4:37

i think i have to agree w/ #10 i still can't figure that one out and i think you may want to do something about that, i have been laughing about your post for awhile now

fmylife13 0

Friday 6 March 2009 3:27

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew

Megbo 0

Friday 6 March 2009 17:57

#43? Really? Sorry skinny people are in shape and work out aka don't act gluttonous 24/7. You yourself must be fat.

savesam 0

Sunday 8 March 2009 18:48

some guys thinks it's cute lol.

Sgt_Schadenfreud 0

Monday 9 March 2009 0:28

http://walking.about.com/cs/treadmilling/bb/bybtreadmill.htm

Clemfail 0

Monday 9 March 2009 2:05

That's f'ed up. Your fat roll creases upward?

vimana 0

Monday 9 March 2009 9:18

Lose weight, you fat ******* pig.

podrummer9209 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 2:38

Ugh. No offense but... uhm... okay. I used to be fat, and when I saw my 'rolls', i nearly slit my wrists. Took me like five years to realize how disgusting I was. I may respectfully recommend Hydroxycut... Just don't overdose.