Why? So he can watch her sleep, refuse to touch her, and use his antiquated morality to manipulate her into his total emotional control?

X2 to what irishjanedoe said.

yeah she could make him tea

that is not a good idea kiddo. Think about it like this: sex is one of the more important parts of an adult relationship or marriage, because ideally, you are saying this is the only person I'm going to do that sort of thing with for the rest of my life. So just as you wouldn't want to marry someone if you couldn't see what they looked like, or how they treated you, why would you want to marry someone without knowing how well you got along sexually? What you're saying I know has good intentions, but just date a guy for months and months before you let him get it, then you know he had to work at it and by then you should know him and be able to trust him. Waiting til marriage I think is a good way to end up in an unhealthy marriage. As far as I see it, you should test drive all aspects of your marriage before making it a legally binding contract. Have sex, live together, be around each other's families, etc.

and, by the way, the only thing that stupid guys are said to be better at is the one thing you are missing.

Still not changing my mind.

very clever of you. good luck.

Elle, with all my respect, but you are 15 years old and obviously not in a relationship. Once you find out that not all guys are stupid, once you get in a stable, decent relationship with a non-stupid guy, well, maybe than you'll change your mind. Now it's a little bit too early to declare your abstinence.

Why? So you can be married to the guy before you know he doesn't dig menstruation? Am I missing the point here?

I think your making a good decision. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and yeah I've wanted to have sex but I believe it's better to wait. I guess my religion has a lot to do with it but at the same time sex wasn't created for everyone's pleasure it is for reproduction, hints why women get pregnant when they have sex.

thank you for understanding me :)

'but at the same time sex wasn't created for everyone's pleasure it is for reproduction' Ah. You're that kind of person. How curieus that they still exist. Well, good luck with your abstinence and your ten children later on, I continue to take contraception, avoid the reproduction and have a very pleasurable love life.

agreed, if sex was only purely meant for reproduction, then why would it feel so good? You might say so that we would inherently know to do it and reproduce and create our gigantic species, but many things are innate and don't feel as good as sex

Unfortunately, a lot of people that feel that way don't ever end up enjoying it particularly much. Since they've internalized the idea that sex is either dirty or exists for one purpose only, they tend to feel like they SHOULDN'T enjoy it, and end up feeling guilty if they do. Doesn't make for a very happy sex life. If you ARE planning on waiting until you're married to have sex...please at least consider not waiting until then to do EVERYTHING. Think about this. No matter how well you know the person, especially if you have sex built up in your mind as something significant (which, if you didn't, you probably wouldn't wait), it's going to be a very big deal and you're going to be somewhat nervous the first time. If you've never seen each other naked, touched, gotten each other off, etc., and you wait until your wedding night expecting to have great sex...you won't. There's a very good chance that that will be far too much all at once, and you won't enjoy it. Most people who don't wait don't do everything all in one night, they make out first, and progress toward sex. You shouldn't expect to do it all at once either, at least not comfortably.