Take the hints

By Unwanted - 03/11/2015 19:10 - Austria

Today, my boyfriend declared he doesn't feel ready to move in with me for at least "some more years". We have already been together for five years. When he bought an apartment one year ago, he kept it a secret for three months. Maybe I should learn to take a hint. Or several hints. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 912
You deserved it 4 688
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Top comments

lexiieeex3 32

He doesn't seem to be the commitment type or even the honesty type. Looks like it's time to move on OP.

216 8

Comments

fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

My sister in law was with her ex for 10 years. After 3 years, she mentioned moving in together and he dumped her. They got back together fairly quickly and 2 years later he bought an apartment on his own. He let her moved in and she was paying a good portion of his mortgage since she made more money than him and the apartment was incredibly expensive. They got married after 8 years together and he dumped her barely 2 years after their marriage under the excuse that he had changed his mind on having children. Now it's pretty obvious that he was never fully committed to her but was enjoying the extra cash and free cooking / cleaning. So, OP, in my humble opinion, your boyfriend keeping secret for 3 months that he bought an apartment and not wanting to live together is already a huge red flag, especially after 5 years together. Take the hint and move on. You can do better.

9 2
PDSot 21

it looks more like he's cheating than he has commitment issues either he has a side ho or ur the side ho idk which is worse either way, he's not committed to both of you

9 3
Alexandria79 22

time to move on, he doesn't want the same future you do AND he is secretive. *hugs*

5 2
Richard6036 13

I'm sorry to say but it sounds like you were one of many have you ever heard that old adage having your cake and eat it too well it sounds like it applies to him or should I say applied to you

1 4
PinkGlitterBunny 8

I have an 8 month with mine and he still refusing to move in sooooo...

3 8
nyf137 20

I'm not sure 8 months is the same thing as five years...

5 1
itscomplicated15 6

8 months and you are already complaining that the guys didnt move in? Thats a little psycho, you know that, right?

8 2
xx000o 27

Have you already decided how many kids you will have once he moves in?

2 1
entangledVines 1

Pretty sure she means "8 month year old kid" not that they've been together for only 8 months.

4 2
Queen_of_Night 20

Good luck with that 37! If you two haven't made a major committment of sorts after 17 months of being parents, then you have about as much future with him as OP has with her's.

3 1
bapbap_fml 15

If I were you I'd be reevaluating the relationship. I'd have left long ago if he wasn't wanting to commit. Think about what you want out of life and your relationship. If he doesn't fit into that, move on.

1 3
nyf137 20

When two people aren't on the same page about their future together, then it's time to rethink the relationship... looks like it's time for you to move on

2 2
eighthling 10

You deserved this OP. If you are looking for commitment, don't date someone who isn't. And don't blame your choosing someone incompatible on them. Everyone doesn't have to be just like you.

2 2
jlaw2000 6

So comment section looks exactly how I thought it would, women thinking that a relationship isn't worth it if it doesn't come with a house and marriage. Just because he doesn't want to move in with you or get married doesn't mean he doesn't value you or the relationship. Wake up women, men don't owe you a house and ring. Proceed to thumbs down this comment to oblivion so it doesn't challenge your entitlement. :)

0 1
Setareh23 34

Actually, I think this IS a good reason for her to dump him. First of all, he LIED to her about where he lived for several months. That is a big red flag to me. Secondly, it's fine if he never wants to be married, but it's also fine if marriage or at least living together is something that OP values. If he doesn't want that and she does, that seems like a pretty reasonable reason for them to break up. Besides, if he truly never wants to live together with her or never wants to get married to her and he's just stringing her along by saying vague things like "soon," then that seems just plain douchy.

2 1
brando1983 9

Sounds like someone is still casually dating on the side.

1 2