Money, Health and Intimacy: Testing testing, one two one two

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Testing testing, one two one two

By regretter - 01/03/2011 01:07

Today, I paid €100 to have a tube shoved down my genitals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 988

You deserved it 7 784

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By welp24 - 28/10/2018 03:00

Today, at the age of 25, for the first time in my life, I was lying mostly naked in front of a man while he was inserting something in my body. Too bad that man was a doctor and that thing was a colonoscopy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 210

You deserved it 371

Up it goes

By 0stvn0 - 16/03/2012 01:18 - Canada

Today, my doctor booked me in for an STI test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said, "Gonna be honest Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 768

You deserved it 5 694

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 00:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 360

You deserved it 4 408

By Bobby M - 16/05/2011 16:33 - Ireland

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 537

You deserved it 10 689

Medicare for all

By US_Healthcare_Sucks - 30/07/2021 14:01

Today, I went to a doctor's appointment, being concerned about some abnormal swelling and soreness in one of my testicles. They fondled my balls for 20 seconds before saying, "Yeah, that's abnormal. You should probably go get an ultrasound somewhere and maybe take some ibuprofen for the pain. That'll be $265." FML

I agree, your life sucks 996

You deserved it 102

Thanks for sharing

By uni life - 15/05/2012 08:08 - Australia - Perth

Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 230

You deserved it 2 854

By kaitlin - 19/02/2010 06:30 - Australia

Today, I lost my virginity to an ultrasound probe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 146

You deserved it 4 399

FML Uncensored

By Anonymous - 15/08/2017 06:00

Today, me and my boyfriend had sex but stopped when I felt pain downstairs. That evening he wanted me to go to the emergency room but I wanted to sleep it off. Turned out I needed surgery. One of my fallopian tubes had ripped. The sex was so rough, I got an intravenous hemorrhage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 633

You deserved it 891

Ouch

By Anonymous - 01/04/2018 05:00

Today, I went in for an STD test. The Q-tip broke off in my urethra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 552

You deserved it 439

By ERnightmare - 02/08/2018 21:00 - United States - Long Beach

Today, I was lucky to have an extremely attractive doctor operating on me. This would have been great had he not been removing a foreign object from my vagina after an ill-fated masturbation session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 120

You deserved it 4 278

ke59100 1

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:00

shoved down your genitals?? do you have a ****** on top of your head?

mintcar 9

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:05

What's the problem? Did you want two tubes shoved up your genitals?

Comments

Joshua3109 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 3:57

oh my god

EpiclyAvenged 0

Wednesday 11 May 2011 8:14

sounds like the perfect day

cait_danielle 0

Wednesday 22 June 2011 23:41

how you getting paid?

rachilio 26

Wednesday 20 July 2011 21:20

let me guess.... a stent for a kidney stone

rachilio 26

Wednesday 20 July 2011 21:20

let me guess.... a stent for a kidney stone

Java6Nerd 10

Sunday 24 July 2011 20:10

How this categorised as intimacy?

Kdawgg01 2

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:36

100?! Around here the pros charge at least 175 for the kinky stuff... Um so I hear that is.

Hawkeye21 1

Wednesday 14 December 2011 12:40

doesn't matter - had sex

horsegirl331 6

Thursday 29 December 2011 4:46

Down? What's tht supposed to mean?

horsegirl331 6

Thursday 29 December 2011 4:48

How about a face lift

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The Top

Today, while working as a veterinary assistant, an owner stood extremely close to me and kept accidentally petting me instead of her dog. After her dog was examined, she asked me if I'd ever had the chickenpox because she has shingles and it's contagious to those who haven't. I haven't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 712

You deserved it 324

Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 770

You deserved it 4 528

The Top

Today, I told the guy I liked about my crush on him. He said he would keep me in mind if he ever hits rock bottom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 349

You deserved it 3 880

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after 6 months because I told him I loved him. Not because he felt any different than I did, but because the term "love" should be reserved for God, and not be said to mortals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 243

You deserved it 262

Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 834

You deserved it 8 866

Today, I thought a pipe was going to burst in my shower because it was making such a loud rumbling so I called my boyfriend freaking out telling him I didnt know what to do. After taking a second to look a little harder, I realized it was my vibrating razor against the shower wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 589

You deserved it 27 818

Today, my grandpa moved into the apartment next door. The walls are wafer-thin. Goodbye sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 104

You deserved it 6 828

Today, I realized my boyfriend only asks me to come spend the night when he needs me to wake him up in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 422

You deserved it 3 999