Love: The reviews are in

The reviews are in

By Anonymous - 30/08/2011 20:56 - United States

Today, I went to a movie and a dinner with a girl. During dinner, she excused herself to go to the bathroom, so I checked my social media feeds while waiting for her to return. She'd posted on her Twitter "Worst. Ever." I thought it was going well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 652

You deserved it 3 032

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Same thing different taste

I'm not the main character in this scene

By Anonymous - 21/12/2023 00:00 - Norway

Today, I went to the movies with a girl I like, then we went to grab a bite afterwards. She spent most of the time telling me how much she dislikes my best friend because he hooked up with a new girl. I then found out the two had been "talking" for a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 113

By Lo - 25/10/2008 16:56

Today, I went to see a movie with the girl I've liked for months. After the commercials, she told me she had to go to the ladies room. She never came back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 796

You deserved it 4 709

The betrayal

By jealous of my friend - 14/06/2022 02:00

Today, after I invited my friend to a movie and she cancelled on me because she had to study, I obviously agreed and cancelled our tickets, I was scrolling through Instagram stories and came across hers, and saw she was with one of her friends in that same movie theater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 310

You deserved it 114

By zed - 09/09/2012 17:21 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I took a girl out to dinner. Halfway through, she sighed and asked if it was all an episode of Disaster Date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 927

You deserved it 3 112

By BrokeAndPsst - 12/04/2011 04:27 - United States

Today, my girlfriend chose the most expensive restaurant in town, then spent the entire time facebooking, texting, and playing games on her phone while I dined in silence. This is the second time we've been out this week. She didn't even eat her food. I didn't even get a thank you. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 184

You deserved it 14 913

By Nico711 - 30/03/2019 02:00

Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 445

You deserved it 209

Paranoid

By Anonymous - 31/12/2014 18:12 - Australia

Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 554

You deserved it 2 947

By Anon - 28/01/2019 06:00 - United States - West Jefferson

Today, my girlfriend and I went on a date. I went to the bathroom. When I came back, she was sitting at a different table flirting with a guy that looked twice as old as her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 560

You deserved it 242

Family matters

By food critic - 22/12/2016 14:26 - Australia - Ryde

Today, I saw my girlfriend's mother tagged at a restaurant, the same one I had suggested we try earlier in the week. At the time, she quickly shut me down because "that place sounds terrible". I guess she forgot that she finally added me on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 796

You deserved it 602

By gotnogame - 31/01/2011 03:13 - United States

Today, I went out with a girl I like. After a movie, we went to McDonald's. There was this couple making out. The girl I was with remarked about how lame it would be to go to McDonald's on a date. I thought we were on a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 060

You deserved it 37 927

deviable 9

Wednesday 31 August 2011 8:46

Maybe it was the worst shit ever?

Mirorbo 26

Wednesday 31 August 2011 8:42

Either young ladies' standards are getting too high, or they themselves are becoming too shallow.

Comments

hoonyer 17

Thursday 1 September 2011 22:41

well, you should meet her expectations, excuse yourself to go to the bathroom, and just sneak away

jay1010 0

Thursday 1 September 2011 22:55

geez wat did u do

DoesUntoOthers 0

Friday 2 September 2011 1:41

If you didn't leave as soon as you read that you deserve it happening.

EmmaSkies 0

Friday 2 September 2011 4:09

If your the kind of date that checks your "social media feeds" at dinner it probably was the worst. Ever.

bellatrix4 0

Friday 2 September 2011 5:58

What I don't understand was, why wasn't he actually watching the movie instead of checking Twitter?

RubySlippers84 11

Friday 2 September 2011 6:39

maybe she meant the movie?

Hunts160 5

Friday 2 September 2011 6:53

do the same to her

bannedforlife 0

Friday 2 September 2011 7:05

If she's stupid enough or mean enough to post that knowing you'll see it she's too stupid or too mean to waste your time and money on.

fuxxx_fml 0

Friday 2 September 2011 10:59

Maybe she was saying she had the worst ever bowl movement.

DeadlikeaPixel 5

Friday 2 September 2011 23:23

To all of you saying: "Why didn't he watch the movie instead of looking at twitter?" If you notice, He says: "DURING DINNER"... You idiots.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, an elderly woman couldn't afford all of her groceries at the checkout so she started to take out a few things. I offered to pay for her groceries; she thanked me and walked out. An onlooker then came up to me and told me that she does it to someone every week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 894

You deserved it 6 228

Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say, "Hello, my name is…" I sneezed right in her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 891

You deserved it 6 444

The Top

Today, we were closing the restaurant early. I begin mopping as a couple walks in. The lady slips and falls, and to avoid a lawsuit, we offer them free food. After they left, I slipped on the freshly mopped kitchen floor with dishes in my hands. I didn't get free food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 979

You deserved it 8 735

Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 906

You deserved it 5 114

Today, I was in one of those lucid half sleeps with my boyfriend. Not fully awake to control myself, I ripped ass. I had no idea what to do. I pretended to still be sleeping. I'm pretty sure he noticed because he patted me on the back in a congratulatory sort of way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 905

You deserved it 6 601

Today, I was informed, after being broken up with, that my girlfriend's father only set her up with me so that she would have more motivation to shower on a regular basis. He actually yelled at me for being broken up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 425

You deserved it 1 983

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 195

You deserved it 7 620

Today, I had a violent sneezing attack while changing my phone's password and now I have no idea what it could be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 869

You deserved it 5 046