Underwear and Health: **** McGee

**** McGee

By BoobiePain - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Canada - Saint John

Today, I got stitches in my breast. I never knew how much they jiggled until every bump on the road made my breast feel like it was on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 235

You deserved it 3 080

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Same thing different taste

By Janice - 07/11/2011 05:12 - Canada

Today, while jogging, I realized my face jiggles more than my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 468

You deserved it 7 940

By J.O.S - 21/03/2012 21:06 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I was stabbed in the chest. Not with a knife though, the under-wire from my bra escaped and stabbed me in the boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 597

You deserved it 3 339

By Lara - 08/01/2016 11:28 - Germany - Bremen

Today, I went to the doctor's because I could feel something solid in my breasts, and I wanted to get it checked, just to be safe. Turns out it was my ribs. Oops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 414

You deserved it 8 357

By Anonymous - 08/05/2013 06:42 - United States

Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 039

You deserved it 5 543

By Anonymous - 18/01/2014 06:29 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 096

You deserved it 10 268

By Anonymous - 14/09/2011 16:34 - United States

Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 420

You deserved it 2 846

By Ouch - 17/03/2010 16:16 - United States

Today, I was walking down the hallway when someone opened a door, smashing it into me. The bump makes it look like I have a third boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 283

You deserved it 3 948

Ethics in medecine

By Savannah - 07/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Spring Hill

Today, I went to the doctor for a suspicious lump under my armpit, so he suggested a breast examination. While pressing all over them he said, "We're gonna have to send you for an X-ray because you have the most lumpy breasts I've ever felt in my life." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 863

You deserved it 595

The joys of motherhood

By Walaa Hamdan - 31/08/2021 04:01

Today, after a 3-day induced delivery for my twins, and after getting stitches down there, I woke up to boobs that are the size of footballs, and still no milk coming out. The pain of chopping them off at this point would be more bearable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 152

You deserved it 137

What a tit

By Anonymous - 17/01/2021 10:59 - United States - Farmingdale

Today, I stabbed myself in the nipple with scissors trying to cut an opening in the supposedly hands-free pumping bra I just bought. I breastfeed my 5-day-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 345

noobienick 19

Thursday 16 October 2014 9:47

I guess they aren't your breast friends

lex1459 38

Thursday 16 October 2014 9:50

How did you end up needing those...? Sorry about the pain, OP :(

Comments

albertozeta_fml 9

Thursday 16 October 2014 16:56

May we have a picture? :D

rats_in_hats 1

Thursday 16 October 2014 17:37

Plot twist: OP is a guy .

truecommenter 7

Thursday 16 October 2014 17:44

I'll come stabilize them, with my hands...

kpopforeverr 11

Thursday 16 October 2014 19:07

How does that even happen?!?!

LucianDracul 8

Thursday 16 October 2014 19:27

can you tell who all are the thirsty men? that sucks. get well soon OP.

RudderV 10

Thursday 16 October 2014 20:40

This girl is on fire!!!

redneckmama 6

Thursday 16 October 2014 20:53

ouch. hope you get better soon. and as for the 824 people who clicked on you deserve it....well...they must be men!!!

retslick 7

Thursday 16 October 2014 20:58

Oh no , why don't you post a photo so we can feel your pain

Mauskau 35

Thursday 16 October 2014 20:58

Invest in a Shock Absorber, speedbumps are absolute killer on my chest but I can hardly feel them when wearing my shock absorber.

LostInTheZone11 29

Thursday 16 October 2014 21:18

Maybe use gauze to help support them, as well as a cushion for the stitches.

Keywords

Holidays Miscellaneous Family Thanksgiving Politics Transportation AITA Am I overreacting? Cars Contraception Love Suspicious Cheating Pregnancy Christmas Scary Sex Awkward Weddings Embarrassing Singing My ex Friends Jealousy Health Poopoo peepee Relatable Mental health Therapy Covid

The Top

Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 203

You deserved it 17 042

Today, there was a long queue at the store, and behind me were two senior citizens. I wanted to do a good deed, so I said, "Cut before me in line, I have all the time in the world." My reward? The old man scolded me because I supposedly insinuated that they were old, and only had a short time left to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 424

You deserved it 13 444

The Top

Today, my roommate’s 17 year-old daughter got broken up with. She locked herself in her room and won’t stop playing "Driver’s License" by Olivia Rodrigo on a continuous loop. Not to mention sounding like an agonizing cat while screaming its lyrics. It’s been 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 306

You deserved it 154

Today, I got a stern talking-to from the police about threatening and harassing people. Who had called them? None other than my stalker, whom I'd just informed about the restraining order I was filing against him after finding him in my house. For the second time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 390

You deserved it 249

Today, due to recent changes in my local transit system, the bus that I take to work and back is a unidirectional loop instead of bi-directional. So my morning commute is the same, but the commute back is now an hour-and-half instead of 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 803

You deserved it 128

Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 887

You deserved it 6 127

Today, I wrote my phone number on a Post-it note and gave it to a cute girl at work. She immediately threw it away. In front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 468

You deserved it 1 022

Today, after taking my clothes out of the washer, I noticed at the very bottom of the washer my boyfriend's USB stick I found a couple of days ago. The USB stick contains his English essay, and his novel he has been working on for almost six months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 248

You deserved it 32 329