Intimacy: Today, after returning home from a camping trip, I found a leech...

By jab43 - 23/07/2011 00:57 - United States

Today, after returning home from a camping trip, I found a leech on my love spuds. I ended up having to call my dad in to help me get it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 065

You deserved it 5 019

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By asdfBUTT - 06/03/2012 01:36 - United States

Today, I went swimming in a pond. I came out covered in leeches. Terrified, I screamed, flailed about and cried out for help until half a dozen people ran over. One of them was kind enough to point out that those leeches I was so afraid of were actually patches of mud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 487

You deserved it 32 195

By Anonymous - 19/02/2010 00:44 - United States

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 067

You deserved it 2 805

By slugitha - 16/03/2016 10:23 - United States

Today, I was awoken by a slug crawling down my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 432

You deserved it 1 857

I don't know why

By Anonymous - 05/11/2019 21:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today I went camping in the mountains with my girlfriend and her very outdoor loving mountain. I sprained my ankle falling out of the car and got bug bit on my penis while peeing. Her dad actually asked why she was dating me and she admitted that she had no idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 612

You deserved it 516

By maruskasommers - 09/01/2012 09:39 - Czech Republic

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 309

You deserved it 2 710

The spirit of John Lennon

By Becks - 07/09/2020 23:01

Today, I found a bug in my bra. Not a huge deal, so I flicked him out. Turns out he was a black blister beetle. I woke to at 3 a.m. to insane pain, as well as the water blisters all over my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 575

You deserved it 117

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 16:47 - United States - Suwanee

Today, I had so much skin peeling off my lips that it got caught in my fork as I was eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 253

You deserved it 5 505

Ticked off

By Sarah220 - 12/07/2010 04:31 - United States

Today, I woke up to a pain on my eyelid. I stumbled into the bathroom to find a huge tick attached to the edge of my eyelid. My dad used tweezers to pull it off, only the head stuck. I had to go to the doctor and sit there for 15 minutes so she could pull the rest out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 578

You deserved it 3 301

By Broderick - 26/03/2011 06:32 - United States

Today, I was hiking, and four miles away from my car and civilization, I tripped over a rock into a cactus. I used duct tape, which ripped all the hair off my arms and legs but ignored the spikes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 076

You deserved it 6 961

By StungAlot - 19/06/2012 10:32 - United States

Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I was writhing in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet and that I'm embarrassing him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 382

You deserved it 2 749

throwglitter1 0

Saturday 23 July 2011 5:49

love spuds? bahaha :)

Idonebeenhad 17

Saturday 23 July 2011 5:56

ydi for calling them love spuds

Comments

roarmiaa 0

Saturday 23 July 2011 6:52

salt removes the blood sucking creatures :) ouch , qood luck with that .

SteelCladAngel 0

Saturday 23 July 2011 6:54

always carry a lighter and a pocket knife when camping next time, heat up the blade of a knife and very carefully touch it to the leech or burn the end of a stick an use the hot stick to carefully poke the leech or simply hold the flame to the leech depending on the body part it's attached itself to lol no more pesky 'OMG dad! I gotta leech on my balls' 'well son, just slap the bitch and she'll stop sucking!'

bibit1990 2

Saturday 23 July 2011 9:24

I lol'ed at your father son conversation... ....priceless....

Kev_a_Sutra 10

Saturday 23 July 2011 6:55

umm this exact same fml was up for vote but with "love spuds" replaced by "ballsack".. so did the mods change it or did this guy submit it multiple times?