Kids: Today, as I walked out the door to head to class, my neighbour's...

By Anonymous - 31/03/2014 17:15 - Japan - Takarazuka

Today, as I walked out the door to head to class, my neighbour's kid threw a balloon at me, filled with some kind of foul-smelling liquid that he calls "liquid ass". I had a presentation 20 minutes later and couldn't get the smell off myself in time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 547

You deserved it 3 080

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Same thing different taste

Taking the piss

By kafreen - 30/08/2016 19:35 - United States - Tucson

Today, I arrived at work early. I noticed the plants on the side of my classroom could use some water so I went out to do so. On the way, I found a beer can. Not wanting the kids to see it, I picked it up but some spilled on my dress. I quickly noticed a familiar smell. No, not beer. Urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 698

You deserved it 1 267

By even axe would smell better - 04/02/2014 18:55 - United Kingdom - Aylesbury

Today, a kid in class kept chatting to his friend, and was made to swap seats. Every time the guy he swapped with moved, the stench from his armpits wafted over. It smelled like nacho cheese crossed with ball sweat. It got so bad that I eventually had to go dry heave in the toilets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 650

You deserved it 3 625

By Anonymous - 22/12/2015 09:26 - United States - Natick

Today, I was in class and I smelled what I thought was month-old trash coming from a student in front of me. I politely ignored the smell, only to realize a few hours later that the persistent smell wasn't coming from every student in my university, but was from my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 235

You deserved it 8 429

Oh shit

By das_shizzle - 30/09/2020 23:02 - United States - Montesano

Today, as I was getting ready to go to class, I accidentally stepped in dog poop. I was in a hurry, so I scraped it off as best as I could. When I go to class, I noticed it smelled. The girl behind me noticed and said, "Mmmmm, smells like food in here." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 122

Wet leg

By meep - 16/03/2017 00:00

Today, as I was walking to wash my hands after using the restroom, the guy walking away from the sink flicked water from his hands towards the floor. Water splashed all over my beige shorts. I had to walk back into class looking like I'd peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 838

You deserved it 442

By Anonymous - 09/04/2013 10:29 - France - Paris

Today, my halitosis was so bad that when I blew onto my solution in chemistry class, it reacted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 147

You deserved it 10 654

By dealtit - 30/07/2014 03:49 - United States - Toccoa

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 167

You deserved it 6 848

By owwthatfarts - 27/01/2017 11:53 - United States - Worcester

Today, one of my preschool students hit me in the nuts in front of my whole class. If that wasn't bad enough, the blow to my crotch instantly triggered a very audible fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 037

You deserved it 533

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 19:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 892

You deserved it 4 114

Drunk on the job

By Anonymous - 29/06/2024 03:00 - United States - Matawan

Today, I was in a rush to get my lunch for work. I quickly opened my fridge to grab it, and accidentally knocked over a beer, spilling a little on my pants. I told myself I'd spray them in the car. I forgot, and when I got into work, someone sat down and commented that they smelled beer. The person was a student. FML

I agree, your life sucks 295

You deserved it 226

ThomasBombadil 31

Tuesday 1 April 2014 1:23

Wow, that's a hell of a prank. Ruin someone's day/week for your jollys. Bummer OP.

mannatee 19

Tuesday 1 April 2014 1:59

How many friends do you have after that assholery

Comments

purebliss_fml 19

Tuesday 1 April 2014 1:48

And here's what you say to him next time you see him - "alright you little shit, game on" then go home and concoct your plan of revenge.

babygurll19 10

Tuesday 1 April 2014 6:02

Oh that'll show him!

drake1138 21

Tuesday 1 April 2014 8:48

Yeah, then make a balloon filled with lighter fluid and throw it at him and set off some bottle rockets in his direction. :/

EvilLittleMan 23

Tuesday 1 April 2014 1:55

Your reply should have been, "I have a solid that I will use to l get my revenge on you, it's called Foot Up Your Ass and Boot to your Face".

Yeshua_fml 19

Tuesday 1 April 2014 1:58

It's unfortunate that happened to you, but that name is hilarious and inventive!

kingdomgirl94 29

Tuesday 1 April 2014 2:17

The little shit got it offline.

babygurll19 10

Tuesday 1 April 2014 6:04

Online* why do people say offline when they mean off the online web? offline is quite the opposite

kingdomgirl94 29

Tuesday 1 April 2014 22:52

Its kind of a smear between "off the internet" and "online" xD I hadn't even noticed I said it until it was too late to fix it. Oh well, my point stands.

Taink3765 6

Tuesday 1 April 2014 2:02

I would have beat his ass till it turned to liquid

Beepbeep7 14

Tuesday 1 April 2014 5:01

You..I like you.That is the exact same thought I had.

skipper2009 18

Tuesday 1 April 2014 2:16

Kick that little bastards ass. Kids today have no respect for nothing.

TallMist 32

Thursday 10 April 2014 2:08

Yeah, I agree. To be honest, though, I did my fair share of disrespectful things. Didn't exactly help my generation's image, but at this rate, I doubt it can be helped. x_x Ah well, who knows? Maybe there's a light at the end of this extremely long tunnel.

Sadgirox 7

Tuesday 1 April 2014 2:25

but April fools is tomorrow........

OhWhoCares 42

Tuesday 1 April 2014 2:25

This made me gag. Liquid ass sounds like some form of diarrhea. I'm sorry OP and that sucks about your presentation. At least you're able to go home and shower off after. :/

CSUNMSU 5

Tuesday 1 April 2014 3:09

Catch him outside and beat his butt with a bag of onions. They don't leave bruises

alicat13 12

Tuesday 1 April 2014 5:02

Onions do leave bruises... telephone book curled up or,waterboarding :-)

KaylaTackett 18

Tuesday 1 April 2014 3:15

If this is something that happens often, I would press charges on the kids parents. If they're not going to punish their kid, punish them for having an asshole kid.