Kids: Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD....

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By MLGreco - 14/10/2011 16:11 - United States

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 478

You deserved it 5 782

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Same thing different taste

Sore loser, even sorer winner

By Silent Fan 2022 - 24/11/2023 22:00

Today, I beat my old college friend at CoD and mocked him vigorously, to which he replied, “Don’t feel bad for me, I have a hot wife, a baby on the way, and a house I paid off by selling my business. How are you?” I… won a video game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 147

You deserved it 761

By Anonymous - 26/10/2014 03:28 - United States - Salem

Today, my brother got upset at his video game and flung his DS at the wall, just as I was walking by. I got knocked out to the sound of someone crossing the finish line in MarioKart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 211

You deserved it 2 881

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 03:16 - United States

Today, my little brother was playing with my cat, getting it to chase a laser pointer. He thought it would be funny to shine the laser pointer over my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 215

You deserved it 3 629

By BlazefireSaber - 07/07/2015 03:59 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I'm sitting in the ER with a broken finger, all because I beat my little brother in a Wii game. He ran over and twisted my finger, saying, "Now how are you going to beat me, cunt?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 537

You deserved it 2 996

By smellsofeggs - 26/11/2009 21:13 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 073

You deserved it 8 508

Dude, gross!

By Mojo0608 - 02/11/2014 21:28 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my 16-year-old brother once again scored well at a local archery competition. He got home and, once again, unleashed his "spectacular aim" at the toilet - or rather the toilet seat and surrounding floor. He refuses to clean the bathroom we share every single time he does this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 295

You deserved it 2 541

By NaomiMadison - 30/07/2011 05:15 - United States

Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 137

You deserved it 3 147

By Christine - 09/05/2009 06:08 - United States

Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" In a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 006

You deserved it 51 215

By john r.t. - 10/11/2012 00:30 - United States - Eagle Pass

Today, I walked in on my son teabagging his sister over a video game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 732

You deserved it 3 511

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/06/2022 14:00

Today, my friend beat me at a video game. He got smug, so I made an "I fucked your mom" style joke. Yeah, kina forgot for a minute that his mom died last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 203

You deserved it 1 284

DrDilllonReese 12

Friday 14 October 2011 21:26

Cats are slowly replacing dogs as the new killstreak

davymac718 4

Friday 14 October 2011 21:27

Payback is a bitch... Well in this case a pussy!

Comments

UNICORNmonster 0

Friday 14 October 2011 23:21

Your brother is awesome.

allstar5464 0

Friday 14 October 2011 23:25

Ha sux big

amberskyz 4

Friday 14 October 2011 23:31

Throw a big bucket of ice water over the shower curtain when he's having a shower, and then the cat when he's screaming in shock.

BellaBelle_fml 23

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:23

Leave the poor cat alone. It's already had enough trauma.

Anglwrfish 17

Friday 14 October 2011 23:32

Well, he certainly knows how to handle defeat, huh. FYL

thethatoneguy_21 4

Friday 14 October 2011 23:32

Hahahahahahaha, best counter strike ever! Your bro may be a tool, but props for the creative attack

lakers2thetop 3

Friday 14 October 2011 23:37

this fml is the best I've ever seen if cats are grenades then dogs are bombs from the carpet bomber killstreak btw haha

zombiekitten87 12

Friday 14 October 2011 23:37

Your brother is a sore loser and an asshole.

eff5 0

Friday 14 October 2011 23:43

Is anyone else wondering why the door wasn't locked?

Rach227 8

Saturday 15 October 2011 0:17

Lots of people don't have locks on their bathroom, especially when there's kids, you don't one of them going in a huff and locking the door and not coming outdo you? :P

BellaBelle_fml 23

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:30

Why would you feel the need to lock your bathroom door every time you use it? You must be pretty paranoid to do that. Plus, what if you were to fall and hit your head or something? Then what? How would people be able to get in fast enough to help you?

murphy22 6

Saturday 15 October 2011 11:38

Most bathroom doors that I've seen that actually do have locks have those little push button locks that are easy to stick a nail file in and pop the lock in case of emergency.