Love: Today, I asked a guy out. He told me no. Well, his exact words...

By Anonymous - 02/11/2015 19:05 - United States - Rogers

Today, I asked a guy out. He told me no. Well, his exact words were, "I would never go out with a whale, sorry." Then he went on to make whale noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 049

You deserved it 4 214

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/04/2009 21:52 - United States

Today, I was at my senior dance dancing with this guy I really like. He was telling me how he likes a strong woman who's not afraid to make the first move. Empowered by what he said, I asked him out. He said no because he thinks girls shouldn't ask guys out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 065

You deserved it 5 094

By apparentlybutch - 05/09/2014 21:11 - United States - Fort Wayne

Today, I asked out the girl I really like. She turned me down, saying that she's a lesbian. That'd be fine, if I were a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 213

You deserved it 4 571

By Anonymous - 09/05/2013 07:01 - United States

Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 864

You deserved it 4 322

No thanks

By Anonymous - 26/02/2020 20:00

Today, I asked the guy I like if he wanted to go to lunch tomorrow at a local restaurant. He replied that he doesn't like their food. I think that's a no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 584

You deserved it 335

By Anonymous - 06/07/2013 11:26 - United States

Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 731

You deserved it 6 802

Jonah begs to differ

By JOTA - 07/10/2020 04:02 - New Zealand

Today, my girlfriend told me she was worried about being eaten by a whale while out kayaking on our holiday tour. I told her that she was way larger than whale food, and that it wouldn’t be interested in her. Now she is accusing me of trying to tell her "nicely" that she's fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 204

You deserved it 371

By moo... - 18/05/2013 02:59

Today, I was on a date with this guy I just met and we went to a fancy restaurant. Halfway through the meal, there was an awkward silence, and he decided to end it by saying "You know, you chew like a cow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 503

You deserved it 13 208

Charming dude

By Hurt as hell - 29/11/2023 07:30

Today, I saw the guy I have a crush on kissing a blonde chick. He'd turned me down because he “wasn’t into blondes”. I’m a blonde myself. When I confronted him about it, he told me, “Oh, I should have been more specific. I’m not into blondes who have a face like Sid the Sloth and a body like Shamu.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 308

You deserved it 782

This Charming Man

By Sheev - 18/10/2019 06:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was texting the guy I like. I asked him why our friend didn't want to come to the movies with us. He replied, "She didn't want to be the third wheel, but it's not like I'm going to put the moves on you. I'm out of your league, and you're socially awkward anyway." That's just what I wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 153

You deserved it 342

Rare and inventive insult

By fuck you - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 653

You deserved it 3 839

olpally 32

Monday 2 November 2015 22:31

Slap him for being rude. Geeze, that's cold.

okokalright 15

Monday 2 November 2015 22:32

You will find someone eventually. Unfortunately, people can be ******* assholes that are probably insecure themselves.

Comments

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 3 November 2015 1:28

Not mature enough for a date...plain and simple...

Grayness_ 26

Tuesday 3 November 2015 1:43

What did you even see in the guy ?

talking_toilet 19

Tuesday 3 November 2015 1:43

I'm going to say this: he shouldn't have called you a whale that was a complete douche canoe of a move but if you are over weight and he just would've said I don't date people who are over weight that would be okay

faifai_fml 21

Tuesday 3 November 2015 1:57

Actually instead of making a judgement call that 'he doesn't date people who are overweight', even if they're amazing and gorgeous and funny and smart and confident and fabulous, a simple "i'm not attracted to you" would have sufficed.

M3_Supr3m3 7

Tuesday 3 November 2015 2:03

if you ever talk to him again, let him know clearly it wasnt meant to be because you dont do fucktards

Mahcookiez 15

Tuesday 3 November 2015 2:17

He could've said no politely, but that's not how the world works.

healthcarechick 9

Tuesday 3 November 2015 2:32

That asshole is a prick and Karma will get his ass!!! And anyone else that says that you deserved it is a stupid ******* prick as well. Opinions are like assholes everybody has one. **** everybody!!!!!!!