Intimacy: Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday....

By Anonymous - 26/09/2014 21:07 - United States - Pensacola

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 207

You deserved it 8 203

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Same thing different taste

By cahsecuel - 14/08/2014 20:44 - France - Grisolles

Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He smiled broadly and said "A porn star!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 655

You deserved it 7 137

Bad influence

By Anonymous - 22/01/2015 18:27 - United States - Katy

Today, my in-laws were visiting. My mother-in-law asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He said "A pimp!" I have no idea where he even heard the word, but the death glares my in-laws gave me made me want to shrivel up and die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 282

You deserved it 3 185

Denied

By Anonymous - 05/09/2020 02:02

Today, my wife asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I said sex. She told me to grow up and ask for something more realistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 946

You deserved it 378

By marie0908 - 17/12/2014 05:29 - France - Siros

Today, my 6-year-old son asked me what a "sex toy" was. Not really knowing what to tell him, I said it was a game. He's asked for one for Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 287

You deserved it 13 608

Issues

By Badkitty14 - 09/08/2012 20:16 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend asked me what he should get his mother for her birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 679

You deserved it 3 721

Good question

By Anonymous - 17/10/2024 05:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, my six year-old son asked me, "Dad, what's a glory hole?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 387

You deserved it 114

By Anonymous - 08/06/2013 10:34 - United States - Bessemer

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 540

You deserved it 15 220

By blegh - 27/12/2011 21:50 - United Kingdom

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 142

You deserved it 8 884

Oversharing

By Anonymous - 13/03/2020 12:30

Today, my 10-year-old son told me that sometimes he wishes that he could be a girl, so that he could masturbate more easily in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 879

You deserved it 270

By Anonymous - 25/11/2013 19:47 - United States - Olive Branch

Today, I was at the grocery store, when a little boy looked up at me and asked if I was a prostitute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 964

You deserved it 13 842

domking1315 20

Saturday 27 September 2014 5:11

Man knows what he wants

cyanidesandwich 21

Saturday 27 September 2014 5:12

All I want for my birthday are big booty hoes...

Comments

neena2 3

Saturday 27 September 2014 20:07

Omg, and he's only 12!

VittorioCarter 8

Saturday 27 September 2014 20:35

My mom would ground me for life if I ever said that word to her

ShadowStalkerLP 1

Saturday 27 September 2014 22:02

Parenting done right! :)

12VCumminsCowboy 5

Sunday 28 September 2014 1:58

Get him a poster of Lindsey Lohan.

Witchylady 17

Sunday 28 September 2014 4:31

Would he even know what to do with a *****?????

SuchaViking 6

Sunday 28 September 2014 7:06

what a little bitch

bootyful86 7

Sunday 28 September 2014 7:46

Terrible reflection of your parenting.

lina21 12

Sunday 28 September 2014 8:41

I hope that was the other parent's idea of a bad joke to teach him that

ciaramad 2

Sunday 28 September 2014 16:04

This Just Made My day?

MikeZander13 7

Sunday 28 September 2014 19:13

Straight to the point

Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Facebook AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Education Relatable Students Technology Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, my boyfriend of a year told me he is at the point in his life where he is ready to start a family, get married and have a baby. He also casually stated that he wished he could meet someone he could see himself settling down with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 335

You deserved it 4 257

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breathes on my neck. Just when I was about to finish, he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck and ear, and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 813

You deserved it 9 769

The Top

Today, working in retail, I noticed a customer looking for an item, so I walked up to them and asked, "Is there something I can help you find?" He replied, "Did I ask for your fucking help?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 880

You deserved it 200

Today, I picked up my Gardasil 9 HPV update shot that my doctor prescribed, only to discover that not only do I need three of them, they are $200 apiece. The guy I was dating who was the reason I needed the booster broke up with me on Friday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 117

You deserved it 290

Today, I got demonic gastric distress while taking my final college exam. I only got about 50% of it done, left the classroom 50% faster, and experienced both 50% dread and 50% relief. Now I have to repeat 50% of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 584

You deserved it 4 226

Today, it took me 2 hours to get my toddler to sleep. Just after I got him down, my mom woke him up by banging my pots and pans around in the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 680

You deserved it 125

Today, while making a grand show of his generosity, my boss gave me my own commissions as a wedding gift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 242

You deserved it 279

Today, I thought it would be funny to put some streamers on my bike handles, even though I knew they would probably be stolen fairly quickly. I went into a restaurant to eat, and when I came out both my wheels were gone, but at least the streamers were still there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 257

You deserved it 9 097