i was searching for this comment! exactly what i thought.

OP didn't ask for permission because he thinks that his girlfriend is his father's property. He asked as a respectful gesture. He probably would have married her anyway if her father had said no and he knows damn well that it's ultimately up to her. While asking for permission does originate in a belief that women were property, it's evolved to become a gesture to show respect to the family

My thoughts exactly, 18. My husband asked me if I wanted to marry him and left my father out of it. After telling my parents, my father asked me if that was what I wanted. Both my father and my husband know I make my own decisions without "permission".

So, what is more important? Showing respect to the family or to the woman you're sharing a life with?

Um, who said you had to choose one or the other?

Understood, some family's are rooted in tradition. The original intent for it was for the betterment of the family. Those that still do it do it as a sign of respect. Though, a lot of old traditions fall out of places or lose the original intent. Also, I highly doubt the father was serious. It was, more than likely said in a off hand sarcastic manner knowing the boyfriend was going to ask anyway.

It's not always mutually exclusive. Some women like the idea of their father saying "yes" to her getting married, after all, he is the other important man in her life...