Love: Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake,...

By jesushelpme - 22/10/2012 19:08 - United States - Nixa

Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 148

You deserved it 5 589

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Eventful day

By Anonymous - 30/07/2021 23:01 - Bahrain - Manama

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight after the gym. Then, a cheesecake I'd baked for a client cracked all the way through. Then, my oven broke as I was trying to make a new one, so I left to bake it at a friend's house, at which point I locked my keys and all of my supplies inside my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 140

By wtf - 30/01/2015 09:00 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 594

You deserved it 2 657

Some fun was had

By Anonymous - 24/09/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom - Barnsley

Today, I got home from a holiday to find out that my flatmate had thrown a party. Everything seemed fine at first, then I noticed that someone had taken a dump in my running shoes that were in my bedroom closet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 74

By Kyokushin - 03/06/2009 14:15 - United States

Today, I came home from work when I heard people in my apartment. My apartment was supposed to be empty, so I entered ready to fight some thieves. I rushed in and hit the closest person to me before the lights switched on. It was a surprise party. I broke my girlfriend's cheek-bone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 946

You deserved it 20 204

By chaos2007 - 13/05/2009 05:11 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. After a day out partying, I came home to find all my stuff smashed in the yard, even my 42" plasma TV. After asking my girlfriend what her problem was, she said a "slut" left a message on the machine stating how fun last night was. It turned out to be my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91 280

You deserved it 5 121

By Nick - 22/05/2018 01:30

Today, my girlfriend and I went to see a horror movie. It ended up scaring her so badly that she refused to leave our bed all night long, even to pee. I have to clean the mattress now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 876

You deserved it 758

By jack - 28/05/2019 12:00

Today, I asked my new girlfriend if she was feeling alright, since she is on her period for the first time since we started dating. I got an empty cereal bowl thrown at my head. Question asked and answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 943

You deserved it 386

It was an accident!

By innocent - 06/01/2014 21:32 - Australia

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 016

You deserved it 7 503

Get out

By Anonymous - 15/07/2022 00:00

Today, I caught my girlfriend cheating, so she smashed me in the head with her handbag so hard my eyeball is red from a burst blood vessel. I followed her home, where she tried to pretend she knew nothing, it wasn’t her I'd seen, she’d been home all day. I had to get the cops to drag her out my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 275

You deserved it 160

By syn1734 - 16/10/2009 17:33 - United States

Today, my girlfriend called me and told me "she has a surprise for me when I got home" in a sexy voice. So, I hurried home only to find a note saying she left me and took my dog. Deeply depressed, I went into the living room. She took my TV also. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 156

You deserved it 3 445

mikepzz 27

Tuesday 23 October 2012 0:49

I wish you luck good sir.

have_a_moment 0

Tuesday 23 October 2012 0:50

Buy chocolate. Tons of chocolate.

Comments

mowmowlife 21

Tuesday 23 October 2012 2:56

well now

mowmowlife 21

Tuesday 23 October 2012 2:58

okay this is nuts. I can't delete comments

chveya 6

Tuesday 23 October 2012 3:10

So let me get this straight. You, a man, want pity because you have to occasionally be in the company of a woman undergoing the agonizing, endless pain that is a menstrual period? You have nothing to whine about. Nothing.

CorruptAngel920 18

Tuesday 23 October 2012 6:43

Would it be better if OP was hit with a shoe? Or how about something else? I don't see how it's "agonizing, endless pain" when it's only a week. Besides, it could be hormones, it could be that OP's girlfriend was having a bad day besides the period. Not everyone's period is the same and just because it might be endlessly agonizing for some, it might last a day or two (of cramping pain) for others.

DanielT1994 19

Tuesday 23 October 2012 10:01

He has a domestic dispute to complain about if he'd like. His girlfriend should be glad he didn't decide to notify authorities. Being in pain is no excuse for attempting to harm your partner. I don't care who you are or what pain your in. It's unacceptable and immature.