Intimacy: Today, I caught my dad spanking my mom with a spatula. The same... - FML

By suckstobeme - 24/03/2010 15:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I caught my dad spanking my mom with a spatula. The same spatula I use to cook my eggs every morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 321

You deserved it 4 706

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By maruskasommers - 09/01/2012 09:39 - Czech Republic

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 309

You deserved it 2 710

Cooked

By Anonymous - 08/03/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my mother cooked breakfast for everyone at my house. Then I later found one of my sex toys in the sink. I “casually” asked her what she used it for, and turns out she used it to make everyone’s scrambled eggs. She thought it was an electric egg whisk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 567

Breakfast time!

By shit flavored eggs - 09/03/2021 00:30

Today, I decided to make an almighty breakfast of fried eggs and bacon. I couldn't find anything to flip the eggs with so I used a red spatula that my sister handed me. As I was finishing a delicious fry up, my mom came downstairs and asked me why the cat litter scoop was resting in the frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 064

You deserved it 459

By Anonymous - 20/09/2010 14:58 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my dad touching his knob, in the kitchen, while cooking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 332

You deserved it 4 005

Fight ****

By Anonymous - 11/07/2022 10:00

Spicy

Today, I heard my step-dad hitting my mom, and her begging him to stop, so I grabbed my cricket bat, ran in, and almost brained him. Luckily I stopped in time, because they were both naked having sex. Apparently my mom likes extreme spanking. Eww. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 519

You deserved it 299

By pasquale - 20/09/2014 06:54 - Australia - Parramatta

Today, my mother threw an egg at my face with force because I returned home 5 minutes late to dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 045

You deserved it 5 631

I love that for you

By NeedHeadPhone - 30/11/2009 16:51 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I overhead my mother's request to be spanked harder by my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 004

You deserved it 2 993

By Laura - 11/03/2011 05:20 - United States

Today, I was waiting for the pan to heat up so I could make myself scrambled eggs. Just then, my mom runs up to me, cracks an egg open on my head, and runs away laughing. I only had one other egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 567

You deserved it 4 607

By ZeroApostle4Ever - 23/02/2012 08:00 - United States

Today, my dad threw a waffle at my face for his own amusement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 078

You deserved it 6 604

By Anonymous - 13/02/2016 05:14 - Canada - North Battleford

Today, my mother accused me of "cooking cocaine", after she found a slightly discoloured spoon in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 263

You deserved it 1 726

Next

Top comments

coffeefiend 0

Wednesday 24 March 2010 19:04

Haha. So your dad likes mom over easy?

thikimo 0

Wednesday 24 March 2010 19:05

mmm yummy

Comments

getsthegirls 4

Wednesday 24 March 2010 22:36

i would love to see what they taste like

mp73 0

Wednesday 24 March 2010 22:38

I hope they're cage free eggs

taylorx3 0

Wednesday 24 March 2010 22:43

lmfaoo thts odee nasty

DallasBeaner 0

Wednesday 24 March 2010 22:44

Nasty

pilnorm 0

Wednesday 24 March 2010 23:00

Can I spank your mom?

pauli_fml 0

Wednesday 24 March 2010 23:09

Niiice!

painkillers 0

Thursday 25 March 2010 0:05

nasty!!

one2skate 2

Thursday 25 March 2010 0:17

sorry, this isn't that funny... now if you'd walked in on them having sex in the kitchen whilst he was spanking her with the spatula, that would have been funny.

BrookeTrueblood 0

Thursday 25 March 2010 0:36

Haha. 20 and 7 win

mistershing 0

Thursday 25 March 2010 0:40

you must be crapping 24/7 having eggs every morning :3

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Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!" FML

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You deserved it 8 438

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You deserved it 91

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I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 264

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I agree, your life sucks 1 256

You deserved it 166

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I agree, your life sucks 5 191

You deserved it 605

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I agree, your life sucks 22 186

You deserved it 4 205

Today, I met one of my favorite fitness models. She told me I need to get in shape. I weigh 150lbs. FML

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You deserved it 448