Miscellaneous: Today, I decided to make a place in my house for my friends to...

By rbates - 25/07/2009 18:32 - United States

Today, I decided to make a place in my house for my friends to sign called “The Friend Wall." By sign I meant sign, not draw body parts. This afternoon I ate lunch next to a basketball-sized vagina and a monumentally large blue and purple penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 790

You deserved it 60 433

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Same thing different taste

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 06:24 - France

Today, I signed my own plaster-cast to make people believe that I actually have friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 866

You deserved it 7 700

Together forever

By Will - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my roommate drew a giant red penis and scrotum on our refrigerator, using what he thought was a dry erase marker. It was a permanent marker. I just renewed my lease. I get to look at a red penis every day for the next year and a half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 262

You deserved it 5 164

Subconscious

By doodler - 27/02/2014 11:59 - United States - Hurst

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 098

You deserved it 13 509

By Hoggiebear - 05/10/2011 16:08 - United States

Today, my friends learned that if you play "connect the dots" with the pimples on my back the resulting picture is a large penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 392

You deserved it 5 369

By stopinthenameoflove - 19/06/2014 14:37 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 092

You deserved it 15 455

By WayTooMuchFacebook - 04/02/2012 05:07 - United States

Today, I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 131

You deserved it 33 529

By Anonymous - 15/11/2009 23:26 - United States

Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 851

You deserved it 37 756

By fucker43 - 02/06/2013 06:11 - United States - Atlanta

Today, my friend made an effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 794

You deserved it 4 731

By WasteOfTime - 01/11/2009 14:36 - United Kingdom

Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 360

You deserved it 3 449

By FlyingFist - 04/12/2012 00:38 - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 140

You deserved it 3 453

aback 4

Saturday 25 July 2009 22:33

Genitals are your friends. I don't see the problem, here.

sydneyinspiratio 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 22:32

Yikes. Nice friends.

Comments

kk8293 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:37

YDI because you made a freaking "friend wall."

awuh_man 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:39

please put your penis in my ****** under your friend wall

cheertigers 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:43

hahahah that's funny, but I'm sorry

deaditegirl 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:45

YDI for making a "friend wall." You sound like you're 13.

remedy_1991 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:46

Sounds like something my friends would do...and Honestly, sounds like something i would do too. :D

Rawrrr14 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:47

YDI haha of course you would have friends who would enjoy drawing "body parts" couldn't you see that one coming? lol

ziqi92 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:51

hey i appauld ur innocence and all, but try to not have friends who always have perverted stuff on their minds.

Rixxieee 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:52

the OP didn't say that they where the only two things drawn, it's not like it's an FML saying 'I ate lunch next to my mate Jane's name' is it?

yeahitstella 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:52

Stick to Facebook, dude

cr1sis 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 23:54

lmfao i have friends like that

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Today, my girlfriend got into a huge fight with her mom over the phone. After the fight, she looked ready to cry so I went over to comfort her. She went straight past me, and started confiding in her creepy, extremely expensive dolls instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 874

You deserved it 3 148

Today, my boss is going nuts after some coworkers quit, as they were some of the lucky few with enough cash to move away ahead of whatever dumbass plan the next administration has for their immigrant families and friends. My boss is complaining he can't afford to pay "normal people wages" and wants me to work overtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 166

The Top

Today, I tore my ass crack. No, not my asshole, my ass crack. I don't know why, I don't know how, I just know it hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 882

You deserved it 124

Today, I was sitting on the couch when my cat decided that the top of my head was the perfect height to use as a springboard to get up to the cat climbing tree. She had her claws out for traction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 844

You deserved it 886

Today, my lamp wouldn’t turn on. I spent a good 10 minutes looking for a replacement bulb before I thought to check if it was plugged in. It wasn’t. FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 1 110

Today, I had to log in to my computer on a projector in front of business associates at my dad's architecture firm. I typed in my username and apparently didn't hit the tab key hard enough, so I typed my password in the username box. The entire firm now knows my password is "tits123". FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 972

You deserved it 77 173

Today, I found out that my phone fits perfectly through the slot between the elevator and the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 736

You deserved it 4 864

Today, I asked a co-worker why he was wearing sandals, as they are not allowed under our strict dress code. He got extremely angry with me and stormed off. Ten minutes later, I got called into our boss' office. Apparently, he told her that I walked up to him and asked to suck his toes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 470

You deserved it 4 076

Same thing different taste

Together forever

Subconscious

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