Sex and Love: Today, I discovered after 11 months, my girlfriend is finally...

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By finallyready - 08/01/2013 19:56 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, I discovered after 11 months, my girlfriend is finally ready to have sex. I discovered this by walking in on her and one of my friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 153

You deserved it 4 677

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Same thing different taste

By rawdoglyfe69 - 17/04/2013 06:14 - United States - Helena

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 514

You deserved it 6 083

It's a trap!

By Ahook1 - 23/08/2010 23:31 - Australia

Today, I discovered that my infertile girlfriend, who I have been having unprotected sex with for the past two months, is apparently very fertile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 404

You deserved it 54 321

By Geez - 19/10/2009 17:02 - Netherlands

Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 217

You deserved it 3 771

By Anonymous - 25/10/2013 23:55 - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been sleeping around. After telling my best friend, I also found out that he and a few others have known for the past month. He asked, shocked, "Dude, I thought you knew?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 671

You deserved it 3 973

By Anonymous - 13/07/2011 05:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 760

You deserved it 8 519

By herve - 22/05/2009 19:50 - Lebanon

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 041

You deserved it 11 621

By baron - 01/06/2009 17:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131 693

You deserved it 7 577

By Anonymous - 13/12/2009 08:39 - United States

Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 965

You deserved it 25 365

By drew - 07/09/2010 17:06 - United States

Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend changing. She responded by screaming, throwing herself on the ground to avoid me seeing her, and crawling into the bathroom. We've been living together for two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 656

You deserved it 5 331

Sorry

By Anonymous - 23/09/2013 18:06 - United States - Olympia

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with another man. Her main reaction was to get mad at me for not knocking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 908

You deserved it 5 081

HappyPanda2016 14

Wednesday 9 January 2013 0:01

I hope you mean ex-girlfriend.. And ex-friend. -_-

Sinamoi 18

Wednesday 9 January 2013 0:02

Saved you the trouble of having to discover who she really was before you did take that big step in your relationship. Send her ass a packin' and find someone worthy of a healthy relationship.

Comments

lowshadows 21

Wednesday 9 January 2013 4:24

acid to the face!

Brooks2011 5

Wednesday 9 January 2013 4:26

Hoes gone be hoes!

KaiCer0 8

Wednesday 9 January 2013 4:26

That shameful ****

genex_skulls 6

Wednesday 9 January 2013 4:33

If its a blonde he must have read her the nursery rhyme hump me dump me

Xotoolyxo 16

Wednesday 9 January 2013 4:47

Go be ready with one of her friends

U_GotitDude 18

Wednesday 9 January 2013 5:26

I've been through this before and it truly sucks. Sorry OP FYL

AlexxIV 3

Wednesday 9 January 2013 5:28

I'm pretty sure this won't have been the first time. Sorry OP :(

fmlforreal92 8

Wednesday 9 January 2013 6:08

As in multiple friends or just one friend?

Rancor 5

Wednesday 9 January 2013 6:14

That is one of the worst possible things to see happening.

cappellaaa 23

Wednesday 9 January 2013 6:25

what a scumbag. you're seriously better off in the long run

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The Top

Today, I was at a friend's birthday party in a packed karaoke bar/restaurant and I drunkenly agreed to sing. I picked a song I thought I knew by heart, only to realize halfway through that the lyrics on the screen were not at all what I thought they were. My brain went for a smoke break or something, and I turned into a rambling mess. The crowd actually booed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 145

You deserved it 370

Today, on the advice of a girl from sales, I sent a company-wide email with the subject line, "FOR SALE - 2010 Toyota Camry." I realized the social faux pas a minute later when my department head replied-to-all, "FOR SALE - half eaten sandwich." Now everyone thinks I’m a dumbass for confusing company emails for Craigslist, and for believing anyone who works in sales. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 490

The Top

Today, despite trying to lose weight for months and making progress, I went out to lunch with coworkers and ended up eating a huge burger and fries. When I got back to the office, I noticed that I'd spilled ketchup all over my shirt. Now I not only feel guilty about the food I ate but I also look like a slob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 607

You deserved it 351

Today, the guy I’ve been seeing said he wanted us to get serious, but first we had to get his wife’s approval. Already taken aback by this, he further explained that his wife died years ago and he wanted me to go to her gravesite with a psychic so we could get her blessing via seance. Check please! FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 379

You deserved it 173

Today, my husband showed up late to my mother's funeral. He swaggered in, happily finishing off a half-eaten taco. His excuse for why he was so cheerful: "She was an in-law, honey." Good to know I married a piece of shit in disguise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 167

You deserved it 5 506

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 625

You deserved it 5 766

Today, in the middle of sex my boyfriend asked if he could use the bathroom. It would've been fine, if he didn't fall asleep on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 613

You deserved it 3 105

Today, I got my pendulum board and I was asking it questions when my mum asked me to ask it if her and 'Jose' will be together. The same person/catfish who scammed 7 thousand dollars from her. She didn't believe me when the board said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 135

Same thing different taste

It's a trap!

Sorry

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