Health: Today, I drew a face on a balloon and pretended to make out with... - FML

By jazthefish - 12/07/2010 19:42 - United States

Today, I drew a face on a balloon and pretended to make out with it. The balloon popped and shot to the back of my throat, where it got caught. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 804

You deserved it 71 734

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Same thing different taste

By ven980 - 01/06/2011 21:21 - United States

Today, I had to blow up an air mattress using only my lungs. After nearly passing out from lack of oxygen, I realized there was a hole in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 844

You deserved it 29 523

By Jared - 25/02/2012 19:09 - United States

Today, I got so bored that I drew a face on my index finger, and made a video of me garrotting it with a string. I ended up rupturing a blood vessel, and had to think up a cover story for my girlfriend to explain my screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 015

You deserved it 30 874

Classy

By pist off - 05/03/2018 19:00

Today, I felt rain on my face. I looked up and saw a man peeing out of a hot air balloon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 028

You deserved it 313

By E or - 13/07/2010 13:41 - United States

Today, I flew a toy airplane into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 894

You deserved it 40 219

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 092

You deserved it 40 037

By doggybag - 24/09/2009 05:17 - Canada

Today, I was walking my dogs. I had a doggy bag, and was holding it closed, then breathing in it, so it would blow up. My dogs 'went', so I picked it up and kept walking. As I was heading home, I absent-mindedly started blowing into the bag again. Everything ended up in my mouth and on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 776

You deserved it 80 943

No good deed, etc.

By Paul - 30/11/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I saw a little kid struggling with a balloon, so I tried to help tie it for her. It popped in my hands, and she started crying. Then her mom came running up, yelling, "What did you do to my daughter?" I had to run away while saying sorry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 315

You deserved it 122

Cool moves

By littlegirl - 07/05/2011 04:46 - Canada

Today, I was sitting with my crush at lunch. Trying to flirt, I tried to stare seductively into his eyes while sucking on my straw. I missed. The straw shot straight up my nose, causing me the worst nose bleed of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 585

You deserved it 45 364

By Anonymous - 13/03/2011 22:26 - United States

Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 763

You deserved it 73 904

Protein source

By Anonymous - 13/08/2021 17:01 - United States - Chicago

Today, a gnat hit my forehead, fell into the space between my glasses and my face, and bounced off my eye while trying desperately to escape. When I tried to get my glasses off, it fell into my mask instead, and I accidentally inhaled it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 157

Next

Top comments

barbarajean 0

Monday 12 July 2010 23:23

Thats what you get for makin out with balloon boy. Damn pedo.

Hannalea_fml 0

Monday 12 July 2010 23:23

Someone needs a life.

Comments

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 13 July 2010 3:56

Is deep-throating what they call "making out" these days? Unless you were doing some serious sucking or you had the (elongated balloon) firmly inserted, I'm apparently lacking the imagination to see how this happened.

danidee 0

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:01

that's actually awesome...lmfao...makes my life!!!!

johnfuknstamos 0

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:04

what's up with these idiots trying to make out with stupid shit

l3eto94 0

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:13

i suggest less tongue

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:49

Erm.... More tongue, less teeth?

newnew8 0

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:25

haha 36 up top made me laugh ;) but why would you make out wit a balloon ? most people do it with a pillow .,, but awhhe yea that's sad ;'(

celticmarine2005 2

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:35

You may be an idiot, but at least you're funny.

mexican_girl 0

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:41

Ok wtf, y is everyone trying to give tips like kissing their hand, pillow, or stuffed animal? I think I even saw grapefruit somewhere... Just wait till u get a bf/gf! Or drunk hookups ;)

FMLephant 2

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:48

if it was a real Guy something else would have shot in the back of your throat

soulofadancer 0

Friday 24 December 2010 14:47

lmaoo

imhowie 2

Tuesday 13 July 2010 5:19

YDI for being pathetic. Get a real person to make out with.

alexdear1029_fml_fml 0

Tuesday 13 July 2010 5:40

you'd die if it got stuck in your throat?You would choke it happend to my uncle with plastic

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