Work: Today, I finally figured out why I've been getting diarrhea so...

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By screwed - 10/02/2013 10:41 - United States

Today, I finally figured out why I've been getting diarrhea so often over the past six months. It only happens whenever I do something "sneaky". My body reacts strongly to how I stress over potentially getting caught. I'm a private investigator, and I apparently need a new career. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 570

You deserved it 4 296

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Same thing different taste

By deuceaddict - 03/11/2017 21:00

Today, I was confronted by my superiors for spending a "suspicious" amount of time in the bathroom every day. Not only did I have to take the test, but I also had to send in a doctor's note proving that I have a bowel condition I'd hoped to keep secret. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 764

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By Anonymous - 18/10/2009 13:36 - Sweden

Today, I got diagnosed with a condition that expresses itself in the form of violent diarrhea whenever I get nervous. Now I am constantly nervous about getting nervous about anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 502

You deserved it 2 895

By monkers - 06/10/2012 07:12 - Canada - Westlock

Today, I have such bad diarrhea that every time I sneeze I poop. I've discovered it's very hard to run to the bathroom every time I feel the urge to sneeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 270

You deserved it 1 781

By Anonymous - 20/08/2013 17:18 - United States

Today, my ass decided that it was the perfect day to exhibit the diarrhea side-effect of medicine I'm taking. I definitely made a lasting impression on my interviewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 230

You deserved it 2 978

By Wow - 23/12/2018 16:00

Today, I have a job interview after months of struggling to find work. I also woke up with explosive diarrhea and can’t be away from the toilet for more than 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 641

You deserved it 151

By it's sharty time :/ - 02/07/2016 18:45 - United States - Bismarck

Today, during an 8 hour shift at a very busy bowling alley, I found out I can't trust a fart anymore. I'm only 25. Now I have to finish my shift commando, and also get rid of the evidence without anyone noticing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 522

You deserved it 1 777

Nervous Nelly

By insaneindamembrane - 16/05/2022 16:00

Today, I finally realized that I have so much anxiety and stress, I would fail a polygraph test asking me my own name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 153

By Anonymous - 01/06/2016 11:05 - Canada - Saint-laurent

Today, I've been chronically constipated so long that I was actually grateful for the sudden blast of diarrhea that ruined my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 522

You deserved it 869

By TheHeirofTime - 15/08/2016 15:11 - United States - Marlborough

Today, I had to cancel an appointment due to diarrhea. I was so nervous that when the receptionist asked why, I told her, "I can't stop shitting." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 261

You deserved it 1 737

Walk, don't run

By Anonymous - 19/07/2022 03:00 - Finland

Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 023

You deserved it 113

Crazynopantsman 11

Sunday 10 February 2013 16:49

It's smelly in here my dear Watson

FMLJFL 5

Sunday 10 February 2013 16:48

Damn, that is some bad luck. But can't you train yourself to pass obstacles like this?

Comments

WelcomeToAndale 13

Sunday 10 February 2013 23:19

I've actually had this happen to me for the exact same reasons.

Jenn50 19

Sunday 10 February 2013 23:54

Because your work as a private investigator made you feel guilty about being sneaky? That's a strange coincidence.

glki 7

Sunday 10 February 2013 23:29

Don't worry, just go to the doctor or therapy and they will sort you out.

CdnTestmonkey 3

Sunday 10 February 2013 23:46

Might not be that, figure out what you are eating those days, could be you actually have some type of IBD and you are inflaming it with junk food.

kawaiisakura 12

Monday 11 February 2013 0:46

Doesn't have to be junk food. My IBS-D acts us with ANYTHING I eat. Whether its healthy or not, doesn't really matter. I don't know about most, but my IBS acts up whenever it feels like it

suri23 11

Monday 11 February 2013 0:05

Take some antidepressants and you won't care so much.

kawaiisakura 12

Monday 11 February 2013 0:41

Taking Imodium a lot makes things worse. I have IBS and that's the only thing that helps. It's good for a once in a while things, big no-no with taking them as often as his job would need

buckdharma 37

Monday 11 February 2013 0:49

No shit Sherlock.

kait11 16

Monday 11 February 2013 0:54

It sounds like irritable bowel syndrome :/ and if it is then you can go see a therapist that will help with your anxiety and stress levels. Maybe even getting a medication prescribed for the stress itself. Hopefully if it worked you wouldn't have to change you're career.