Miscellaneous: Today, I found out my friends call me 'Shamu the whale' behind... - FML

By Shamu - 27/02/2011 19:28 - United States

Today, I found out my friends call me 'Shamu the whale' behind my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 011

You deserved it 7 088

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Wasted

By Anonymous - 05/08/2013 15:33 - United States

Today, my parents held a big family dinner at our house. Being the only underage person there, I had to sit there while everyone got progressively drunker and started commenting on how eerily similar I look to Shamu the whale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 952

You deserved it 4 765

By Username - 19/05/2011 22:46 - United States

Today, my family went to Seaworld. When we got there, my dad sarcastically told me not to get lost, because I might get mistaken for Shamu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 194

You deserved it 7 952

That one friend

By meesa in big doo do dis time! - 13/06/2017 12:00

Today, I learned that all of my "friends" refer to me as the, "Jar Jar Binks" of our circle of friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 527

You deserved it 474

By Anonymous - 12/08/2012 17:25 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, I found out that ever since I got my blonde highlights, I've been mocked behind my back at work, and nicknamed "The Skunk". FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 884

You deserved it 13 420

Thanks guys

By ConfidenceShattered - 07/05/2022 14:00

Today, I walked past a group of men on my way to work. Instead of catcalling me, they made pig and whale noises at me, and yelled fat shaming comments. By the time I'd reached my building, I had been reduced to tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 196

You deserved it 334

By Anonymous - 06/04/2015 03:31 - United States - New Britain

Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 928

You deserved it 5 130

By Shrimpy - 16/03/2019 20:00

Today my girlfriend and her 3 friends walked in on me doing a solo performance on myself. They stood their quietly and videoed it unknown to me. And then afterwards laughed and made fun of how small I am. And to make it worse forwarded the video to everyone. Now everyone calls me shrimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 144

You deserved it 520

By brutality - 15/06/2009 05:38 - Canada

Today, I saw a few old co-workers at the bar. They recognized me and started calling me by the nickname they had for me that I was unaware of. It appears I was known as "butch megan" by the entire office for 2 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 957

You deserved it 4 122

By fakelaugher - 20/12/2010 03:41 - United States

Today, I found out that my friends have been "fake laughing" whenever I make a joke just so that the situation doesn't get awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 296

You deserved it 24 296

Where d'you all go?

By Notwanted - 20/04/2021 17:00

Today, I found out why the group chat I was in with my friends has been dead. Apparently, they made a group chat without me in it, so that they could make fun of me behind my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 238

You deserved it 92

Next

Top comments

SaltedSeaSlug 0

Monday 28 February 2011 0:51

I guess they really aren't your friends, are they?

nerdsgetmehot 22

Monday 28 February 2011 1:02

Whether or not you're heavy doesn't matter-- your friends shouldn't be rude to you! Get some new friends.

Comments

massagenist 0

Monday 28 February 2011 10:43

do you have vitiligo ?

Premiersupporter 0

Monday 28 February 2011 11:07

that can be fixed YDI you can lose weight, you can make better friends! suck it up and make your life better

figmo 0

Monday 28 February 2011 11:31

sounds like you've got no friends, shamu. start hanging out with people where you're the skinny one.

bigredmonkeybutt 28

Monday 28 February 2011 11:56

You've burned off .06 calories typing this FML with your fins. Great start!

acirenie 0

Monday 28 February 2011 12:36

they're not very nice friends! let alone a true friend.!

DakotaCat 4

Monday 28 February 2011 15:00

Has anyone noticed that Moby DICK is a SPERM Whale? Thar she BLOWS! He is also hunted by SEAMEN!

10_4Franky 0

Monday 28 February 2011 16:27

It's fine 50, anyone could've made that mistake online. It's almost darn near impossible to read emotion with the way people type.

Acousticpixie14 6

Monday 28 February 2011 16:44

#86 has a point though...although they should have just kept it to themselves.

letsgetouttahere 3

Monday 28 February 2011 18:42

Sucks. My friends have loads of nicknames for me :3 They'd never call me something behind my back though. Your 'friends', they're not good friends OP. Not at all..

NINJAPROTOTYPE10 0

Monday 28 February 2011 22:03

maybe its just because she has a really good body.... think about that

3
4
5
6
7
8
9

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Miscellaneous Poopoo peepee Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Relatable You're fired Work Cars Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Roommate Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, my mom kicked me out of the house because I missed my curfew and overslept at my boyfriend’s house. She said she’d let me back in on one condition: that I was still a virgin. My boyfriend’s parents won’t let me live with him. I’m currently staying in the Walmart restroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 315

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 024

You deserved it 3 406

The Top

Today, I moved in with my new roommate. She's a vegetarian, and won't let me put my meat in the fridge because it will "contaminate her food". FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 737

You deserved it 6 053

Today, I’ve been working 4 months to cover people isolating, so I was finally looking forward to a Saturday of fishing, a date night then a lazy Sunday watching TV. Only my wife who, as soon as she heard I had a whole weekend free, handed me a list of vital house jobs that need doing, “NOW NOW NOW.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 407

You deserved it 225

Today, I watched a grizzled old gas station attendant, with a stain on her blouse, use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 238

You deserved it 2 919

Today, I offered "Girls Gone Wild" as an example of bad TV in my lecture thinking it was a reality TV show. It's porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 849

You deserved it 29 091

Today, I went on a coffee date with a guy I'm interested in. He picked up his phone mid-date to finalize dinner plans with another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 850

You deserved it 3 055

Today, I posted on my Facebook wall that I'd gotten into a huge bar fight and had the shit kicked out of me, all to avoid having to tell the truth, namely that I'd stayed home all night because nobody invited me out to party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 046

You deserved it 34 522