Kids: Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told... - FML

By Pumpkin - 18/07/2009 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 205

You deserved it 102 949

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Same thing different taste

By parent - 08/03/2018 01:30

Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 224

You deserved it 2 829

By anonymous - 19/08/2013 05:41 - United States - Lamar

Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 385

You deserved it 3 058

By Mom - 25/07/2009 21:14 - United States

Today, my son decided to come out of the closet by wearing a shirt that said "Mom, I'm gay" to the family reunion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 888

You deserved it 26 223

Get with the times

By Anonymous - 01/11/2009 17:51 - United States

Today, I found out that my daughter is dating my boss's daughter. I found this out because my extremely homophobic boss told me and wants me to 'heal' them or get fired. I didn't even know my daughter was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 222

You deserved it 3 378

Bad thought

By Anonymous - 24/12/2019 03:00 - United States - Longmont

Today, I found out that my parents have thought I'm lesbian for at least a year. I now understand why my dad has been trying to get me to "hang out" with his co-worker's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 847

You deserved it 202

Misunderstood

By not a phobe - 16/07/2020 08:02

Today, my son told our whole family and all our friends that I kicked him out for being gay. I kicked him out because on more than one occasion he got drunk and sneaked random men in the house while he was supposed to be watching his younger siblings while I worked nights. They believed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 364

You deserved it 271

Mixed messages

By mook - 15/07/2009 19:33 - United States

Today, my neighbor confessed to me that he was homophobic and regrets that his family doesn't know it. He spent fifteen minutes explaining how much he would hate to have a gay child. I spent two hours last night convincing his son that it was the right thing to tell his family he was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 263

You deserved it 5 694

By Jason - 05/02/2018 15:30 - United States - Kenai

Today, I found out that my girlfriend is actually a man. Not a transgender person, I'm okay with that, but an actual gay man who gets a kick out of pranking other guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 547

You deserved it 1 019

Denial

By TedX - 19/08/2020 20:07

Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 658

You deserved it 247

Trans women are women

By whoops - 03/10/2020 05:06

Today, my son brought his new girlfriend home. I took him aside and hugged him, reassuring him that I loved and accepted him no matter his sexual preference. He looked at me confused and asked what I meant. His girl was obviously trans, but he had no idea. I didn’t know he didn’t know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 896

You deserved it 366

Next

Top comments

imamonster1 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:08

yeah this kid is a champ.

Sirrush 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 12:08

haha, that's a great idea, very original. But seriously, if you were a bit open minded with him you could have avoided this... I'm also kinda wondering just how you found out.

Comments

fmah_life 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 0:06

Wow, your son is THE MAN!

Sapphy 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 0:35

HA! :D

Jake_Bright 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 1:07

lol what a smart kid

princeton16 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 1:26

ok i think that this is like the best thing ever. tell your son i love him. ok and i don't at all understand this "close minded" thing everyone is saying. you could maybe, maybe say strict but close minded is not at all what she is being! the kid is probably like 15, and she doesn't want him to knock someone up at this age! oh, and im a teenager, not some obnoxious 45-year-old checking fmls at work.

g739 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 1:27

225 calm down its a joke u tool

jackiexbby 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 1:29

that is brilliant!

jr21soccer 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 1:31

that kid is a ****** genius!!! that is the smartest thing i've ever read i wud b proud of ur son for being that minplitive and im rele good at trickin my parents but i nvr thought of that 1 sooooooo smart

wrestling49 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 1:52

i think this is the smartest thing i've ever heard of!! God bless ur son!!

c3ns0r3dn4m3 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 2:04

freakin' genius

AMelodyofJuly 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 2:05

Your son is brilliant. What a way to commit to a goal. That deserves a standing ovation.

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The Top

Today, my son invited me to his first standup comedy gig. I accepted, only to later suffer through an hour of the worst jokes I've heard in my entire life. It was so bad, he made Dane Cook look like a comic genius, and I had to resist heckling him. Hours later, I still feel vaguely suicidal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 937

You deserved it 6 045

Today, I went to the airport to pick up my long-distance boyfriend. Having waited six months for this, I was stoked. After waiting for three hours and sending numerous messages, I was eventually informed I was a week early. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 823

You deserved it 14 278

The Top

Today, my brother and his girlfriend got married. I got a pretty bad pimple on my nose not long before, and I'd tried to pop it. It turned into a really bad scab instead, so I put makeup on it. I didn't notice until after the wedding that the makeup made the scab look badly infected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 193

Today, we are having work done and our chimney breast has a hole where a brick is missing. Well, my husband thought it would be funny to rig up some realistic spider leg things that would poke out of the hole next to my face. I had to wash the sofa cushion because I pissed myself from fright. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 101

Today, I received a call from a potential employer. I was excited, until my roommate starts loudly moaning sexually in the background. The interviewer got offended and hung up. My roommate did it because I "made her" pay my half of the rent this month. FYI, I’m unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 212

You deserved it 202

Today, after my idiot son joined the army, flew out on deployment, he then flew straight back home again after accidentally shooting himself. His squad leader said it was the most bizarre accident he’d ever seen while still being considered an accident. As I said, my son's an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 117

You deserved it 232

Today, just like every other day, my mom has prioritized doing chores and chatting with her neighbors above even talking to me. This would be fine, if it wasn't in Animal Crossing. Apparently, a lifestyle video game is more important than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 134

Today, I received a very expensive bottle of wine for Christmas. My alcoholic mother snuck into my house while I was out and drank the whole bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 791

You deserved it 2 657