Intimacy: Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently,...

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By OhGeez - 08/06/2009 19:41 - Canada

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 049

You deserved it 22 738

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Same thing different taste

By auto boogie man - 19/11/2015 16:44 - United States - New York

Today, at school, I was asked to play a complex piano piece in front of my class, teachers and guests. I nailed it, but what stood out most for everyone was how I apparently looked like I was being possessed while performing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 026

You deserved it 2 157

By skyhawk13 - 30/10/2009 05:11 - United States

Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 129

You deserved it 53 918

Mesmerized

By Embarrassing - 26/06/2021 13:59 - Canada

Today, I was hypnotized and talked into telling everyone truths about myself at a show my family and I went to. I don't know what I said. All I know is that my family laughs whenever I'm near them. They won't tell me what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 208

Glee

By musicmaniac13 - 18/03/2011 19:08 - France

Today, I performed in my school's choir concert. The girl next to me started to pass out, and I grabbed her so she wouldn't hit her head. After we were done performing and the curtains closed, my choir teacher dragged me off stage and said I was getting an F for "creating a distraction". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 717

You deserved it 3 366

By Anonymous - 04/04/2014 17:26 - Dominican Republic - Santo Domingo

Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 105

You deserved it 20 381

By lifesucks - 24/02/2009 19:21 - United States

Today, I walked into work after being completly wasted last night. I was sitting in a meeting when all of a sudden the presenter had gotten an e-mail saying "crazy girl dances on tables at local bar". So obviously everyone wanted to watch it. That crazy girl was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 963

You deserved it 50 292

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 03:10 - United States

Today, I got hypnotized in front of my entire school. Once I was hypnotized the guy told me that the hottest celebrity in the world was in the audience and then he told me to point out who I saw. I said I saw Mick Jagger. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 796

You deserved it 10 416

Dozing off

By Math_Rocker - 02/09/2009 22:17 - United States

Today, I fell asleep in class. Usually, people just sit still when asleep. Nope, not me. Not only had I been violently rocking and nodding my head, the teacher stopped class for everyone to see for 5 minutes as she made jokes. What woke me? The intense laughter, followed by embarrassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 339

You deserved it 35 157

This is the future Big Tech wants

By Anonymous - 28/08/2023 22:00

Today, I was playing a virtual reality game at a gaming convention. I got so into it that I didn't realize I was screaming and flailing around in. A crowd had gathered to watch my dumbass embarrass myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202

You deserved it 723

By xsnqw - 19/01/2016 22:28 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 582

You deserved it 6 963

4bbaf9d3caaa8f84 20

Tuesday 9 June 2009 1:59

wow, that sucks. At least you didn't call out someone's name like your mom's, dog's, sister's etc...

FrootLoops_ 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:00

that must have been awkward afterwards :)

Comments

JessieRaye 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:15

Oh look, i got edited. So I will say it again. *SNEEZE* Oh sorry, I am allergic to bull excrement.

coopcas 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:16

30, it was Mick Jagger, dipshit.

Button_x 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:17

#31 LMAO. XD

FrootLoops_ 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:17

whoever edited # 23's amazing master piece of a comment should just go die :)

xleanne_aLly 23

Tuesday 12 July 2011 16:55

what'd 23 say?

ziqi92 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:17

dont volunteer for hypnotics next time!!

your_mother 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:18

OMFG THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER READ IN MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!

beebeeL 1

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:18

this is SO fuccing funny XD

Shizden 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:19

30 it was Mick Jagger not michael jackson

annaattack 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:19

Hahahhahah this is HILARIOUS. 23 & 30 FTW.

itsgen 16

Tuesday 9 June 2009 2:20

if i were you i would move schools why the freak would you let urself get hypnotized you never know the stupid things you could do

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You deserved it 5 321

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I agree, your life sucks 14 676

You deserved it 910

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I agree, your life sucks 1 055

You deserved it 111

Today, I had a bath in the bathroom we are currently renovating. There's a big hole in the middle of the floor. When I got out of the bath, I swung one leg across the gap to get a towel from the rack. I drew back my leg and looked down to see my brother's hot friend staring up at me in horror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 809

You deserved it 21 104

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I agree, your life sucks 1 951

You deserved it 206

Today, my cat has decided she can't eat unless I'm right there with her, so when she gets hungry she finds me and howls until I follow her to her food dish. She likes to eat pretty frequently, and I'm already getting a headache. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 248

You deserved it 3 925

Today, our little family business was asked to do a presentation at my daughter's school. When we got there and I saw her, I waved to her happily but she totally blanked me, plus my super strict mom smacked me on the back of the head for embarrassing her by not acting professionally while I was technically working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 804

You deserved it 181

Same thing different taste

Mesmerized

Glee

Dozing off

This is the future Big Tech wants

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