Health: Today, I got my colonoscopy results back. I had hoped they'd...

By billiams15 - 06/05/2012 21:57 - United States - Katy

Today, I got my colonoscopy results back. I had hoped they'd show what's been causing my stomach pains for the last few weeks, but instead it turns out that my colon is healthy and normal. I basically got cornholed for no goddamn reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 426

You deserved it 4 331

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Same thing different taste

Full of it

By romoangel - 21/04/2020 05:00

Today, I felt a very sharp pain, like my appendix was going to burst. After going to the doctor, I was rushed to the hospital to get tests done. The doctors later told me there's nothing wrong, I was just constipated. I went to the hospital for them to basically tell me I'm full of shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 516

You deserved it 563

Rip it up and start again

By Anonymous - 24/12/2022 15:00

Today, after fasting for 24 hours and drinking 2 buckets of laxatives, my doctor's office notified me that my colonoscopy had been cancelled. I'd just finished the prep by taking the fart pills, and now have the cleanest colon ever. A lot of time spent on the toilet that I’ll never get back though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 059

You deserved it 122

By fulloshit - 28/11/2010 02:17 - United States

Today, I woke up with extreme stomach pains. After being rushed to the hospital and having numerous tests performed, I was told my intestines were over-stretched with stool. I'm essentially so full of shit it hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 070

You deserved it 4 597

By Anonymous - 11/09/2016 05:52 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my colon got perforated during a routine colonoscopy. Apparently, it's a rare complication and I have no legal recourse. So now I'll need to use a colostomy bag for the next 6 months until I can get surgery to fix their mistake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 229

You deserved it 1 087

Take deep breath…

By paininthe*ss - 13/02/2023 00:00

Today, because of my life situation, I was told I'll have to have a colonoscopy without anesthesia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 851

You deserved it 127

By blehh - 14/04/2009 20:40 - United States

Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 293

You deserved it 54 669

By stoolgal - 23/09/2016 06:19 - United States - Yukon

Today, I found out after a lot of panic and a visit to the gynecologist that the lump in my vagina isn't cancer. I was just constipated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 505

You deserved it 1 447

By Anonymous - 28/01/2014 19:43 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, after months of random vomiting with no apparent cause, I finally got some tests done. The doctor says there's nothing wrong with me and that it's all just in my head. Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 715

You deserved it 4 322

By John - 24/06/2011 07:17 - United States

Today, I had my anus probed twice by two different doctors. I was diagnosed with hemorrhoids. I'm a 22 year old guy and have to schedule a colonoscopy for next week. I guess there's a first time for everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 125

You deserved it 3 430

What a way to spend the day

By theark - 22/08/2022 10:00

Today, I was informed by my proctologist that my colonoscopy has been rescheduled for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 935

You deserved it 86

mubaki 18

Monday 7 May 2012 0:57

My colonoscopy results showed that I had crohn's disease. If you're unhappy with yours, let's trade

yrkamurka 4

Monday 7 May 2012 0:55

What what in the butt.

Comments

jknice 0

Tuesday 8 May 2012 0:52

My new chemotherapy makes me fart nasty farts. I went to a bar with my dad and some people bought us shots. I farted and everyone started freaking out about how bad it smelled and they all moved away from us. I was mortified.

jamis666 1

Tuesday 8 May 2012 3:58

That happened to me too!!!!! Worst thing ever!

poohappens26 0

Tuesday 8 May 2012 4:23

Get your prostate ? Mmm yummy bahahahahaha

poohappens26 0

Tuesday 8 May 2012 4:27

Douche

rcgirl2 11

Tuesday 8 May 2012 5:16

Better to be safe than sorry!

disney_blonde 16

Tuesday 8 May 2012 5:19

You're upset you don't have colon cancer?

roskoe89 5

Tuesday 8 May 2012 14:29

Would you rather have read that you had cancer? That would really have been FML

pyrozach911 2

Tuesday 8 May 2012 16:33

Same happend here... Clean as a whistle

BloodFaerie 21

Wednesday 9 May 2012 7:45

I feel ya... I have been X-rayed from here to kingdom come and had to get an CT scan that was a bad experience and constant blood tests.... and nothing to show for them except bills.... the doctor suggested an MRI next and I just glared at her before finally saying "I'd rather not..."

ShyAnn29 14

Wednesday 9 May 2012 19:20

I was 13 when my colon shut down, due to colonic inertia and had to be removed, then at 16 my rectum shut down, due to rectal inertia and I had that removed, then at 18, I had to have an ileostomy that I still have, I also have inertia throughout my entire digestive tract, and I have chronic abdominal pain because of it. So be glad that you don't have what I have