Miscellaneous: Today, I got to explain to someone that "enjoying the warm, rich...

By Aether - 03/06/2014 22:51 - United States - Lake Jackson

Today, I got to explain to someone that "enjoying the warm, rich aromas of fecal matter" is not a good subject to use as an ice breaker for making friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 570

You deserved it 4 774

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Same thing different taste

By poopboy - 16/01/2017 10:49

Today, I sat next to this really hot guy in my writing class. We struck up a conversation, and it was going well, until he began describing, in excruciating detail, his IBS and fiber problems, and how he always has to poop. Good to know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 364

You deserved it 859

By nature - 25/09/2017 23:15

Today, I had to explain to my 7-year-old son that it's not okay to smell others' "wieners". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 377

You deserved it 338

By me - 20/12/2011 03:53 - United States

Today, another employee scolded me for being "socially awkward". The same employee who just before had a 10 minute discussion with a client about her poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 196

You deserved it 2 455

By Sabre777 - 17/08/2019 22:00

Today, while as a therapist, a client made an audible fart and pointed out that she had done so. Shortly after, she wrinkled her nose as she savored the odor. She began to discuss her significant trauma issues. Before I could respond, her fart wafted over to me, making any mature response pointless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 593

You deserved it 162

By Anonymous - 09/01/2011 18:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to explain to my friend why it's inappropriate to conduct a phone conversation while simultaneously eating a bagel, listening to music, and taking a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 942

You deserved it 3 934

By ninalian - 22/05/2011 06:30 - United States

Today, I was talking to this boy I really like and we were laughing together, until I got this disgusting putrid smell. I started to say how awful the smell was and he stopped laughing to take a sniff too. As soon as he closed his mouth the smell was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 181

You deserved it 4 505

Noise machine

By achtung - 01/02/2009 23:57 - United States

Today, I had to use my friend's toilet. His pretty cute sister was in the kitchen adjoining the bathroom, so I smiled and said hi on my way through. I then had the loudest and most vile-sounding shit of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 139

You deserved it 5 834

Too real

By ann - 05/06/2021 14:00

Today, my daughter complained that she no longer wanted to talk about poop, as it grosses her out. This is a girl who can eat a rare steak while watching a guy’s arms get hacked off on TV, but poop is where she draws the line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 852

TMI, dude

By Anonymous - 23/11/2018 16:00 - United States - Cranford

Today, my brother met my girlfriend for the first time. Instead of making a good first impression, the first thing he did was talk about how he just took a massive dump and didn't wipe very well, and that's why his hand smelled bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 293

You deserved it 249

By Ammile - 25/12/2018 04:00

Today I had a customer come into my office smelling like feces, urine and body odor. I tried not to get sick to my stomach but failed miserably. I threw up in my trash can in front of him. It now smells like feces, urine, body odor and vomit in here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 908

You deserved it 197

paigexox0 37

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:39

Thats...concerning. Also..really guys, first AND second comment?

poopsi 19

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:45

I don't know.. Seems like a good conversation starter to me.. :c

Comments

poopsi 19

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:45

I don't know.. Seems like a good conversation starter to me.. :c

Blake77_fml 19

Wednesday 4 June 2014 9:20

You're one of those special people where the picture goes with the text

IllestRated 17

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:48

Or anything involving fecal matter

Cass_x 22

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:48

Some people.. I just.. Ugh. Smfh.

Pstraka6 20

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:48

My question is why would you have to explain to someone that that isn't isn't an icebreaker? im sure most people arent receptive to that or the smell when meeting them

kasmol 16

Wednesday 4 June 2014 9:12

It could be they are just a big fan of Two Girls - One Cup.

joea21 21

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:51

How old was said person? Is there even an age limit to where this is ok? Like 2?

onlychildFTW 33

Wednesday 4 June 2014 10:43

Well farts are hilarious I think. But I've been told I act more like a 2 year old so that might be me...

ihavenolifehaha 16

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:51

Lol that's nasty

weveallbeenthere 30

Wednesday 4 June 2014 8:59

that's pretty gross.

kasmol 16

Wednesday 4 June 2014 9:02

Sing along to the commercial! The best part of waking up is feces in your cup!

carsonator45 9

Wednesday 4 June 2014 9:07

Well I guess you could say it was a *puts on sunglasses* Shitty situation YAAAAAAA

2ndSucks 15

Wednesday 4 June 2014 9:19

no.

91hayek 31

Wednesday 4 June 2014 9:38

They could be referring to the warm aromatic tones of civet coffee (Kopi Luwak) that technically is fecal matter passed from the Asian Palm Civet. The coffee is just really expensive animal poop ground up.

catanita 18

Wednesday 4 June 2014 12:24

That is no true at all. Local is called cat and eats the fruit and she poops out what remains - undigested coffee beans. The beans are washed very well.