Love: Today, I had a date with a girl. Wanting to make a good impression,...

By zevil - 18/11/2008 16:54 - Peru

Today, I had a date with a girl. Wanting to make a good impression, I spend a lot of time getting ready and by the time I get to the place we were supposed to meet she isn't there anymore. I call her to see where she is. She's in bed with another guy and says "I was REALLY waiting for you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 789

You deserved it 9 746

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Overenthusiastic

By Sash - 06/04/2012 21:04 - United Kingdom

Today, I dressed up for a date. After waiting for hours, sending countless texts and voice mails to my date, and thinking I'd been stood up, I remembered my date is actually scheduled for tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 620

You deserved it 38 368

Where are you?

By Anonymous - 05/09/2024 06:00 - United States - Buffalo

Today, I had a date with someone I met online. We agreed to meet at a nice restaurant. I got there early, ordered a drink, and waited. And waited. An hour later, I texted to ask where he was. His response? "I’ve been watching you from my car for the last hour. Decided you’re not my type." FML

I agree, your life sucks 618

You deserved it 102

By supergingerr11 - 09/07/2011 05:55 - United States

Today, I was supposed to have a double date. My date didn't show. I spent my day in the living room waiting for the pizza guy while my best friend and her boyfriend made out. The pizza guy never showed either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 564

You deserved it 3 068

Running late

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I woke up very excited because I was going on my first date with this guy I really liked. I dressed very nicely and went to where we were supposed to meet. I waited for about 2 hours. I called him to ask him where he was. He got angry because he was still sleeping and I woke him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 152

You deserved it 3 877

Dating is hell

By Anonymous - 15/05/2022 02:00

Today, I got stood up on a date. To add insult to injury, meeting up was her idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 96

Trading places

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Bremerton

Today, my date ditched me and showed up with another guy at the same restaurant. She even tried to take the reservation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 641

You deserved it 2 856

By Anonymous - 18/12/2010 20:33 - United States

Today, I was stood up on a date. Her excuse? "I had to work out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 213

You deserved it 3 574

Profile pictures

By Anonymous - 21/06/2024 00:00 - United States - Macon

Today, I went on an online date. I'd spent a while getting ready and making sure I looked good. When I arrived at the café, I saw my date and approached with a smile. He stood up, looked me over, and said, "Oh, I thought you were your profile picture’s friend." Then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 252

By mariah_1_11 - 06/03/2010 05:14 - United States

Today, I was supposed to go on a date with a guy I really like. My friends convinced me that he was going to stand me up and that I should just stay home to avoid being hurt. He showed up; I didn't. My friends laughed at my gullible nature. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 266

You deserved it 41 340

By nightxxtime - 10/01/2017 14:39

Today, a guy I'm dating was supposed to come over. He would have if I haven't fell asleep while he was waiting for me to open the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 835

You deserved it 3 448

rachelroller 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 8:06

wow what a wh*re! aren't you glad you didn't go out with THAT? who knows what you would've caught..

jim_witness 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 21:31

Your sin in vanity. Her sin is lust. You would've had such beautiful children *sniff*

Comments

kdb268 1

Wednesday 16 December 2009 7:13

I mean, how late were you exactly? Were you like 10 minutes late and she was already in bed with another guy? :-/ Not cool.

me0wme0w33 4

Thursday 7 July 2011 21:08

doubt it

GCali4 0

Monday 4 January 2010 23:11

what a *****! she probably has an std or something gross

happyhak 5

Wednesday 27 January 2010 22:55

Maybe she was REALLY waiting for you for a threesome! :) Lol

Trollz4daLULZ 1

Tuesday 13 July 2010 14:59

u ppl nede two wach hoe u spel shit! I **** reed NEtheng u ppl rite!

WishUponAWorld 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 7:46

Umm... how late were you, exactly?

krismir29 0

Thursday 2 December 2010 19:45

your hott

donnie111 12

Thursday 30 June 2011 9:01

we all have those days..

Jordyn345 4

Tuesday 9 August 2011 3:56

You probably shouldnt have taken so much time getting ready...

cheeeeeeers 3

Friday 23 September 2011 6:39

this is a fake fml

stevenmx86 7

Thursday 13 October 2011 2:03

How about stop being a girl, comb your hair, spray on some cologne and go meet her BEFORE she gets bored and leaves with someone else... Ydi

Keywords

Love My ex Awkward Friends AITA Jealousy Embarrassing Health Poopoo peepee Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Money Relatable Work DIY Parenting Kids Accident Parents ADHD Medication Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, I wanted to show my friends my cat’s “high-five” trick. I held out my hand, and instead of a high-five, my cat scratched and bit me instead. I yelped, and my friends burst into laughter. I had to bandage my hand, all whilst they joked about “cat training.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 375

Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 472

The Top

Today, I decided to put my computer on slideshow mode. Did you know that hidden files are also read when you put slideshow on? I discovered this, as did my entire family, when my naked girlfriend appeared on the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 667

You deserved it 14 394

Today, I berated my five-year-old nephew for peeing on the floor. His mom bitched me out for expecting "a little boy to have perfect aim." That's funny, it looked pretty good when he dropped his pants, looked me in the eyes, and started to piss on my rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 459

You deserved it 3 563

Today, I heard my sister talking to my mom about me, saying that I have the ability to suck the life out of a room like a Dementor. I walked in and asked what she meant by that. My mom replied, "She means you're an asshole." I love you too, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 731

You deserved it 6 777

Today, in thanks for my assistance, a customer recommended me a plastic surgeon who could "really help with that face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 911

You deserved it 2 538

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by sending me a text. She was sitting right beside me on a 10 hour car trip, and there was still 6 more hours to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 337

You deserved it 3 160

Today, desperate to meet a guy, I went clubbing. The only guy to show any interest opened with, "You're hot, for a black chick!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 424

You deserved it 2 751