Health: Today, I had to explain to someone that all beverages, except...

By technical - 31/03/2015 02:50 - United States - Mount Vernon

Today, I had to explain to someone that all beverages, except plain water, actually have calories. They weren't too happy that their milkshake diet was over before it began. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 983

You deserved it 2 379

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Same thing different taste

By aineroo - 05/11/2014 21:25 - Ireland - Galway

Today, I managed to convince my sister that when you press down the diet button on the lid of a McDonald's cup it turns whatever is in there diet. I pressed the button and she started shouting how she hates diet drinks. She's 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 647

You deserved it 3 918

By J - 11/02/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, at lunch I ordered a coke. The waiter replied "diet coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular coke." He shook his head and said again, "diet coke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 187

You deserved it 8 854

By DeepFriedLettuce - 29/04/2016 01:33 - United States - Vashon

Today, I had to explain to my seventeen year-old daughter that deep frying food doesn't "melt the calories." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 450

You deserved it 1 532

Thanks, I think?

By Skimilk - 18/02/2010 02:47 - Australia

Today, I went in to my local cafe for my morning coffee. I was chatting to the barista as she was making it, and I mentioned that I was starting a new diet. She goes, "Oh that's great! I've been sneaking skimmed milk in your coffee for years, I didn't want to say anything…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 144

You deserved it 5 888

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 19:10 - United States - Findlay

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a Diet Coke?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 788

You deserved it 10 011

Conspiracy watch

By Veeee32 - 18/11/2021 07:58

Today, I got screamed at by my mom for about 10 minutes because she claims I’m ruining my diet by drinking sparkling water, claiming it’s “soda”. I had to explain that it has zero sugar, calories, etc. She told me that it’s “the same fucking shit.” And to not trust “the government food labels.” Huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 147

Life hacks

By just walk away - 07/04/2022 01:00 - United States

Today, I wanted to believe that people couldn't possibly be this stupid, but prior to surgery my brother's wife was put on an all-liquid diet. The idiot didn’t realize that putting cake and ice cream in a blender didn’t make it a fucking clear liquid. She argued, “I’m not eating it, I’m drinking it!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 012

You deserved it 107

Got milk?

By IHaveNoIdea - 10/06/2024 22:00 - Australia

Today, a customer asked if our milkshake flavourings contained dairy. I had no idea, and it seems the manufacturer assumes milkshakes will contain milk, so didn't state on any of the bottles that they were dairy-free. I had to google every obscure number in the ingredient list to check. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 132

Overreacting a tad

By phonnah - 20/06/2012 17:59 - United States - Bowie

Today, my friend told me she was going to start drinking Gatorade, so she could get the body shape of the athletes on TV. When I tried to explain to her that she'd also need to work out to achieve this, she went nuts and hurled the bottle at my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 382

You deserved it 3 232

By Kimmiko - 04/06/2009 12:17 - Germany

Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes she did! She's lying I saw her drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 199

You deserved it 7 167

jpsullivan 36

Tuesday 31 March 2015 11:59

Do you work as a professional dream killer?

False_Stupidity 41

Tuesday 31 March 2015 12:00

They could still do a low calorie milkshake diet. Doesn't have to be zero, right?

Comments

tiggerdoc 14

Tuesday 31 March 2015 12:46

What is worse is after reading this FML, I wanted a milkshake.... My flat mate had eaten all my ice cream... FML

Gillett 23

Tuesday 31 March 2015 22:53

Me too!

WeezyYaHeard 6

Tuesday 31 March 2015 12:55

Damn talk about a nigga moment! Child please

Ironic_Meme 10

Tuesday 31 March 2015 13:02

Nigga went full retard wit dat milkshake shiiiet

mattrd_fml 31

Tuesday 31 March 2015 13:15

milkshake diet??? those people were idiots. but I thought diet sodas had 0 calories...

glabberfasted 16

Tuesday 31 March 2015 13:52

You thought correct. Coffee also has zero calories.

Merylwen 24

Tuesday 31 March 2015 14:15

Yes but diet soda is basically poison.

marcusbjohnson 4

Tuesday 31 March 2015 13:25

many beverages have zero calories. you explained incorrectly.

Shade1982 20

Tuesday 31 March 2015 14:02

People are idiots. Calories are literally energy, so 0-calorie foods/drinks are absolute nonsense... You need energy to live and function...

Bragi 12

Wednesday 1 April 2015 3:56

24: Sure, but most people have plenty stored away...

sabrinawho 15

Friday 3 April 2015 5:42

Water is not nonsense. You need it.

lazyslumber 18

Tuesday 31 March 2015 15:14

Better than the milkshake diet is to shake it off. Exercise with proper diet will give them healthy results.

tronjohn 6

Tuesday 31 March 2015 15:17

Black coffee does have calories, about 10 cals a cup actually..tea doesn't have any and green tea is especially good for you..although I wouldn't suggest living off that.