Miscellaneous: Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at...

By Anonymous - 13/02/2012 01:11 - United States

Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 400

You deserved it 2 502

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 20:00

Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 453

You deserved it 226

By my cheese grater + your dick - 17/01/2014 17:35 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, my grandma said, "I know you don't have any plans tonight. Do you want to go to bingo with me?" I said sure out of pity, and ended up being her designated driver after she got wasted later in the evening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 137

You deserved it 5 311

Drunk level: 2000

By morningbirdie - 20/09/2020 14:01

Today, I had to pick up my dad because he was too drunk to drive home. Drive his wheelchair home, that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 195

You deserved it 98

By driverboy - 31/12/2014 08:08 - United States

Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 912

You deserved it 4 877

By Congrats to me - 24/05/2014 23:57 - United States - Canton

Today, the only person in my entire family to show up sober and on time to my graduation was my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 712

You deserved it 4 152

By Anonymous - 09/05/2015 20:50

Today, my drunk grandma flashed me, after confusing me, a 19 year old girl, for my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 911

You deserved it 2 355

By Anonymous - 02/09/2019 04:00 - New Zealand - Invercargill

Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 806

You deserved it 164

By kylie18xx21 - 01/02/2013 15:26 - United States

Today, I had to leave my ACT prep class ten minutes in to pick up my drunken father from his best friend's baby shower. I picked him up along with a bill for the damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 456

You deserved it 2 302

By nyebust - 01/01/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 211

You deserved it 8 144

By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 16:49 - United States

Today, I had to pick up my drunk mom at bar. While we were driving home, she thanked me over and over again, and then said, "Thank god you have no life!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 736

You deserved it 4 506

DontClickOnMe 28

Monday 13 February 2012 9:01

Sounds like a cool grandma.

disco2466 8

Monday 13 February 2012 9:01

your grandma is gangsta

Comments

RogueWarrior869 23

Tuesday 21 February 2012 13:11

Jeez, how boring was that church if granny needed a nip? =p

ice_bck_420 0

Monday 12 March 2012 8:04

Well at least shes not in jail right?

sissors1234 4

Thursday 7 June 2012 2:31

Benny from gorge lopez

merrielp 13

Monday 11 June 2012 2:27

It happens.

tatertot33 8

Sunday 24 June 2012 6:01

Redneck

sammieb 5

Sunday 30 September 2012 2:08

Oh gram-gram what would we do without you :)

rhastafish 13

Saturday 11 July 2015 6:57

She goes hard to the paint

Kelnyquist 22

Wednesday 2 November 2016 5:12

Sounds like gramms knows how to party!!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my long-term boyfriend took me to my favorite restaurant. After the main course, he knelt down and finally proposed to me. I was so happy, I almost cried. Until an old woman came over and said I was way too old for him. I'm three years younger than my fiancé. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 950

You deserved it 2 710

Today, the AC broke in the kitchen of the restaurant I work at. Temperatures reached over 100 degrees and one of my coworkers nearly passed out. Our boss accused us of being "dramatic" and only let us step out after I collapsed. I need this job too badly to quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 044

You deserved it 1 717

The Top

Today, my boyfriend said he's in love with another woman and is leaving me. This wouldn't be as bad if I weren't seven months pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 206

You deserved it 681

Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend asking if I'd Skype with him. Thinking he'd find my tousled bed hair and big t-shirt sexy, I went on. The first thing he noticed was the massive booger on my face that stretched from my nose to the other side of my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 733

You deserved it 37 712

Today, I ordered lunch from DoorDash. I was surprised by how good the dish was, and went back on to rate the dish, and sent it. Without realizing, my phone autocorrected my review to “it looks the way hell tastes”. I don’t even know what I tried to say. I hope they don’t spit in my food next time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 728

Today, I was sitting next to this really cute guy in choir class. Trying to make conversation, I asked him what his favorite song was. He replied "Leave Me Alone". I asked him who it was by and he said, "It's not a song, I just want you to leave me alone". FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 347

You deserved it 9 278

Today, I got a text from my crush. In my clumsy attempt to quickly grab the phone, I knocked it off the kitchen counter and cracked the screen. After driving to my friend's house so I could put my sim card in her phone, I saw that the text said, "Who is this? Stop texting me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 095

You deserved it 14 774

Today, I asked my mom why she decided to be a parent. She replied, in all seriousness, "Everyone else was doing it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 718

You deserved it 3 848

Same thing different taste

Drunk level: 2000

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