By Anonymous - 23/05/2013 01:57 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML
I agree, your life sucks 61 370
You deserved it 4 763
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Top comments

Sir_ND_Pity 35

I say let him try it. He'll see how far his swag will take him. Life lessons.

665 7
BananaDildo 1

McDonalds is now accepting graduates from Swag University. Maybe he'll get in.

446 7

Comments

darwinism 30

Yes, the judge will let him go after a few years. But first he must show inmates at the local prison what "swag" is, to stop them from reoffending once on the outside.

48 1
Ambiguous404 6

Swag can get you very far! I agree with him! I don't see anything wrong with this! I passed high school just because of my swag

ileenefudge 29

I cant tell if you're being sarcastic or not but I think you might have passed because they got tired of seeing you and your "swag" there...trust me, I may only be 21 but living on my own as a single mom and graduating college in a year, swag gets you no where in the real world. You won't find a good job with it. Try having Class and maturing a little and i'm sure you'll get much farther.

39 4
ileenefudge 29

Sorry I just really hate stupid phrases like swag and Yolo. I hope I wasn't to harsh with my last comment because that wasn't my intention.

29 3
CharresBarkrey 15

If you showed up, you passed high school. It's one of the easiest parts of life, it's not really something to brag about finishing.

21 11
Christala 8

I do. Can we do drive-by head-batting of hipsters on fixies while we're out looking for swaggots?

11 3
Christala 8

I agree with you that swagger alone will not get you far. However, there are plenty of situations where a little cockiness or swagger can project confidence and competence, two things that are very useful in say a job interview or public speaking engagement.

11 4
Ambiguous404 6

Ouch, I was being sarcastic! In hindsight, this was a bad joke I am sorry if you were offended! Oh and by the way here in England we have something called GCSEs and A levels and you have to pass them by studying and doing exams not by simply turning up! Anyways my apologies if you were offended

17 1
ileenefudge 29

No big deal everyone makes mistakes. I actually went to 2 different high schools because I switched foster homes between 10th and 11th grade and school was incredibly hard for me. I know so many that ended up graduating though just because one of my schools wanted to make room for the new students so seniors often just went to summer school and graduated from there instead of repeating the grade and walking with the class.

4 0
UnluckyGenius 21

I smell a troll.

5 17
UnluckyGenius 21

Can you share when you find said bacon?

19 2
mr_sarcastic416 29

I smell burnt toast (waits to see how many get the reference)

14 2
UnluckyGenius 21

I am glad so many of us are on this quest for bacon, I have many a senior citizen tell me "This is not the meat you are looking for." And I have half a mind to taste test next time.

6 1
tckma 9

26, This reference will be lost on most non-Canadians. Being American myself, I have not actually ever seen the commercial; but was just told about it often by Canadian friends.

5 1
monnanon 13

26 isn't smelling burnt toast one of the signs you're going to have a stroke?

2 7
larsak 3

Tell him "damn straight!"

14 3
NotGabe 28

There's no way you can lose with that logic.

27 2
GrinchFu1 27

Not only does this moron deserve a nice long stay in county or federal prison, I hope the judge orders sterilization as well. People like this terrify me. Someday these mindless pricks are gonna procreate... Oh my god. The thought of this guy raising children is going to give me nightmares tonight. This is gonna be a loss for you but a short term win for us.

36 4
AwkwardHaole808 16

Swaggits. Ruining their lives, one step at a time.

3 1
sacmaster 11

The judge may just let him go if he sports a yolo shirt while showcasing his swag and ends every spoken sentence with 'swag'. Now that is an impenetrable defense.

16 1
Steffi 26

Maybe the judge will let him go for lack of self awareness and common sense..

7 2