Intimacy: Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even...

By CityBoysNow - 11/09/2013 00:14 - United States - Lake Saint Louis

Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 629

You deserved it 13 273

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By miapapaya - 15/02/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 347

You deserved it 6 672

By Bulldogs09 - 01/07/2009 04:41 - France

Today, I finally hooked up with the boy of my dreams at a party. Later, while on AIM, I noticed one of his friend's away messages was a quote from the guy's screen name, which said, "I can't believe what I stick my dick In sometimes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 733

You deserved it 12 466

Quickie

By wasntworththedrive - 20/01/2010 06:43 - United States

Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 737

You deserved it 4 921

Waste of time

By Anonymous - 11/08/2019 00:01

Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 943

You deserved it 892

Let down

By Anonymous - 23/12/2021 17:01 - United States

Today, I visited a friend out of state. We've been flirting for months and decided to fool around at night. He was very loving and attentive, but... he'd bragged about his dick being 6 inches and it ended up being not only thin, but very short. So thin and short that I couldn't really feel it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 518

You deserved it 378

By Anonymous - 28/06/2013 19:41 - United States - Chicago Ridge

Today, a girl from my college, who's been following me around for months, finally asked me out. Not being interested, I politely declined. Now she's convinced everyone that we hooked up and that I have an incredibly small penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 831

You deserved it 7 462

By Lovejunkie - 01/03/2010 07:30 - United States

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 730

You deserved it 8 664

Murphy's law

By murphyslaw948 - 27/11/2019 05:00

Today, I fall for a guy after 3 years of being celibate, after he shows all the signs of being into me. Turns out, he likes my best friend who is dating another guy I liked and was just using me to compensate for her unavailability. Guess I am really a walking, talking example of Murphy's law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 931

You deserved it 239

By Noname - 11/03/2009 20:29 - United States

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my Facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one with the smallest dick I've ever seen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 003

You deserved it 9 604

That one hot friend

By Stillicide - 18/03/2022 17:00 - United Kingdom - Swindon

Today, I found out the guy I’m in love with has been side-messaging one of my closest friends about hooking up for sex. This isn’t the first guy this has happened with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 240

You deserved it 200

Cheeley 17

Wednesday 11 September 2013 10:59

So if I get a small car the women will be all over me?

annie_nk 22

Wednesday 11 September 2013 10:59

There's a reason why stereotypes exist. And this guy proves that.

Comments

Frickenlovecats 4

Wednesday 11 September 2013 23:09

I'm getting a big truck soon...

Freddie1015 5

Wednesday 11 September 2013 23:50

Dont think that about ever guy with a big truck some guys just have bad luck in that area

HighasaCloud 46

Thursday 12 September 2013 1:00

How is this an FML? Your life sucks because you didn't get the ******* you wanted? Go get it somewhere else then. **** his life.

yourwifelovesme 25

Thursday 12 September 2013 2:14

I'm about to buy a smart car now lol

EvilLittleMan 23

Thursday 12 September 2013 2:18

If that's how it works then I am buying me a Smart Car !

Pot14 9

Thursday 12 September 2013 2:51

Not all us country boys gotta prove something with trucks.

thatgirlincali 13

Thursday 12 September 2013 4:11

It's so nice to know that the world has come to some people only having interest in someone because the size of their nether regions. And you suddenly don't like him because he's small? OP you sound shallow.

BrotherPhil 35

Thursday 12 September 2013 4:20

There once was a man of Cornpaw Whose dick was one inch and no more. It was ok for keyholes And little girls peeholes But it was lost in a bloody great *****.