Intimacy: Today, I learned that my boyfriend waits 'til I am asleep to... - FML

By Anonymous - 05/01/2010 07:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, I learned that my boyfriend waits 'til I am asleep to wack off to porn on the internet. We haven't had sex in months because he doesn't want to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 078

You deserved it 3 857

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Libido

By Jena - 05/08/2022 01:00 - United States - Portland

Spicy

Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 233

You deserved it 334

By Gabi - 20/02/2012 14:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend would rather jerk off than have sex with me. Even if I'm next to him in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 258

You deserved it 6 553

Slacker

By Anonymous - 13/05/2024 08:00 - United States - Babylon

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd rather jerk off to sexy pictures of me than actually have sex, because he gets too tired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 110

By anon - 25/10/2010 05:42 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out my boyfriend watches porn. Specifically, today, while I was in the shower. In the next room. We were alone in the house and he still chose porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 727

You deserved it 7 175

So frustratiiiiing

By Anonymous - 26/06/2022 12:00

Spicy

Today, I caught my boyfriend masturbating, again. Meanwhile we haven’t had sex in weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 966

You deserved it 453

By Anonymous - 18/07/2013 19:01 - Netherlands - Herkenbosch

Spicy

Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 477

You deserved it 6 678

By hannieannie - 09/02/2016 21:51 - United Kingdom - Oxford

Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 378

You deserved it 3 123

Bored

By Anonymous - 23/06/2022 18:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 244

You deserved it 387

By serenti - 13/10/2011 21:30 - Sweden

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he likes me is because I let him watch porn without throwing a fuss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 158

You deserved it 7 034

By apparently inexperienced - 11/09/2012 16:54 - United States - Brockton

Spicy

Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 767

You deserved it 6 490

Next

Top comments

Lucky_Adi 0

Tuesday 5 January 2010 16:09

has he been looking at gay ****?

mattgotest2 0

Tuesday 5 January 2010 16:13

He's obviously become obssesed and needs help. It's not necessarily you.

Comments

taylortrash1993 4

Friday 13 May 2016 5:25

Figure something out or your relationship is done--if it is not already.

TwiztidTaush 6

Monday 12 April 2021 13:23

At least he waits till you're asleep.... mine doesn't even do that. Or clean up his mess afterwards. I've stepped in it... three times.

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight

The Top

Today, I got a call from a lady who said my husband died in a car accident in Miami. My husband is supposed to be at a business trip in North Carolina, so I told her it must be a mistake. Turns out it was all true. He lied about a business trip and went to Miami with his lover, who was the woman who had called me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 798

You deserved it 58

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 483

You deserved it 11 507

The Top

Today, we had the police called on us for our loud sex noises. This led to my boyfriend making the joke that he’s so good at sex “even the police came.” It was funny at the time, but less funny when he told our friends. Even though I told him to stop, he keeps telling people, and it's pissing me off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 237

Today, I picked up on a telemarketer and started speaking in Portuguese. It turns out that this particular telemarketer spoke it as well. Every time I hung up, he called back. Telemarketers get really excited when they find out someone else speaks their language. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 521

You deserved it 10 459

Today, my friend had invited me to his home for a movie night with another friend. I had to decline because I have prior plans. He then revealed that they only wanted me there so I could bring DVDs, but "don't worry, we'll find something on Netflix to watch instead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 104

Today, I had to listen to my boss say "Arabica beans" in a goofy, fake New England accent every time the McDonald's ice coffee commercial came on the radio. I worked a 12-hour shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 754

You deserved it 3 274

Today, despite being on the pill and always using condoms, I'm pregnant. I told my boyfriend I want to keep it, hoping he wanted to keep it too. He told me he hopes I enjoy being a single parent, because he absolutely does not want it, but knows I’ll never get an abortion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 640

You deserved it 611

Today, I was draining the water from my fishbowl out into the kitchen sink. The fish was still in it and decided to go with the flow, literally, right into the garburator. I was too scared to stick my hand down there to save it; instead I panicked and turned the garburator on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 391

You deserved it 2 568