Transportation: Today, I learned that you should always make sure the car is...

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By Ellen - 21/11/2009 00:56 - United States

Today, I learned that you should always make sure the car is in 'park' before you get it on wildly in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 273

You deserved it 30 396

Epic Easter: Chases and Chutes
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Same thing different taste

By CassieMarieee - 10/12/2011 06:28 - United States

Today, I had to jump into my car while it was still moving. Apparently, just because you put it in park and turn it off, doesn't mean it won't take off towards a ditch without warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 046

You deserved it 8 839

By tandc - 01/05/2012 05:07 - United States

Today, in a rush to squeeze out of a particularly tight parking spot, I made a hurried 12-point turn. Just to make sure I had enough room behind, I hopped out of my car. It was still in reverse. I managed to wreck my own car without even sitting in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 370

You deserved it 28 019

Goddammit

By Anonymous - 10/01/2010 02:20 - United States

Today, while arguing with my boyfriend about how I wasn't a bad driver and could parallel park, I thought it would be easier to just let him do it. Unfortunately, while getting out of the car to switch seats, I forgot to take the car out of drive and it ran into the car in front of us. He was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 324

You deserved it 31 933

By Anonymous - 15/04/2009 18:19 - United States

Today, I backed my car into a parked car in a parking lot. Not only did I back into a parked car, but it was the ONLY parked car there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 224

You deserved it 72 647

Chasing cars

By Anonymous - 26/10/2023 08:00 - Canada

Today, I tried to parallel park my car in a tight spot. After several failed attempts, I finally parked, but then realized I had parked on a slight incline. My car started rolling backwards. I had to chase it down the street in my pajamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 926

I'm so tired

By slapstick1982 - 30/05/2024 03:00 - United States - Port Washington

Today, after double-checking to make sure the garage door was completely open, I backed my car into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 281

By El Stupido - 12/06/2011 13:51 - Australia

Today, I was stuck in stand-still traffic for 5 minutes, before realizing I had stopped behind a parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 195

You deserved it 58 448

By hatemylifelol - 08/01/2016 20:33 - United States - Roseville

Today, I noticed I parked behind a boy I like. Trying to impress him with my driving skills, I ended up forgetting to put the car in reverse and rear-ended him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 226

You deserved it 20 880

Ohhh, wham bam thank you ma'am

By gagus123 - 28/10/2021 02:00 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, I accidentally left the handbrake off in my car, got out, locked it, and started walking away. Then I heard a loud noise and looked over my shoulder and the car was gone. Of course, it hit the only other car parked in the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 956

By holly10350 - 14/10/2010 03:08 - United States

Today, I allowed my friend to practice driving in my car. As she began to let the car roll forward, she looked at me and very seriously asked, "Brakes is the right pedal, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 014

You deserved it 30 045

tropicthunder 3

Saturday 21 November 2009 19:49

So you guys had a real sex drive

Sk8trlover19 3

Wednesday 29 August 2012 20:35

That's common sense, hope you learned from that cuz that's dangerous

Comments

Jagger117 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 17:43

#1 assumes everyone in the world is a lazy ass and owns an automatic. idiot. and op ydi for being a dumbass, I hope you rolled into a ditch

iheartjustinsane 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 19:20

Ahaha YDI!

Standupboi 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 21:48

you stole this from secret girlfriend!!

bexox 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 5:27

People watch that show?

moonlit_manga 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 23:06

stupidity Is a choice, choose wisely.

joemk2012 0

Wednesday 25 November 2009 3:28

uh, yes?

Danceswithsmurfs 0

Thursday 31 December 2009 6:16

and getting it on wildly in your car is bad how?

blackwidowtaco 31

Friday 30 August 2013 7:13

If the car is in motion while both passengers are as well, it's certainly not going to be a happy ending.

Alchemist919 0

Tuesday 5 January 2010 1:56

yep, i recognize this from the show secret girlfriend!

captivate17 0

Saturday 5 February 2011 2:10

lol this happened to me once too. scary as shit!

sammy259 3

Tuesday 29 March 2011 2:12

that just makes it more fun imagine cumming on her face while flying down a hill at 60 miles an hour

mhinaj 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 0:07

no duh r u stupid?

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The Top

Today, I opened my lunch at work to discover that my sandwich was a soggy mess. The Tupperware I'd put it in was a piece of crap, and all the mayo had leaked out. I tried to salvage it but then spilled the whole thing in my lap. I ended up eating my lunch with a plastic fork, and even my fingers, like an angry animal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 120

Today, while at Six Flags my boyfriend won a huge stuffed animal for me. After a whole day of carrying it around, when he dropped me off he told me that he wants the stuffed animal back. He just didn't want to carry it around all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 786

You deserved it 3 691

The Top

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 018

You deserved it 7 833

Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 040

You deserved it 2 034

Today, my parents held an intervention for me. Apparently they think I'm turning into a goth. All because they saw me re-lacing my shoes with black shoelaces instead of white ones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 054

You deserved it 3 079

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to make me dinner surrounded by a candlelight setting. By the time I got home, we had 7 firefighters surrounding our house. Turns out one of the candles fell on the carpet and lit up the curtain as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 153

You deserved it 2 345

Today, after an entire week of doing all the household chores, and feeling under appreciated, I suggested to my boyfriend that we go on a date night, to feel a little more connected. He has spent all day trying to get out of it. I offered to pay, because I just want to feel loved again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 314

You deserved it 234

Today, I found out that the mystery flowers I received from a “Johnny” that caused my boyfriend to dump me on Valentine’s Day was really from him. He concocted this plan to make it look like I was cheating on him with a “Johnny” instead of confessing he was leaving me for someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 379

You deserved it 95