Love: Today, I'll be sleeping in my car for umpteenth time this year,...

By agony - 17/12/2011 03:29 - United States

Today, I'll be sleeping in my car for umpteenth time this year, because my psychotic wife is again convinced that I'm sleeping with practically every woman in my state. I'm too broke to pay for a divorce, and too embarrassed to go to a friend's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 057

You deserved it 5 889

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Today, my tiny apartment flooded. My family lives out of state and the few friends I have all gave me B.S. excuses for why I can't stay over for a few nights. I'm so broke this month that I'll probably have to hit up my psycho ex. FML

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You deserved it 337

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Today, I'm accused of vandalizing a cop car during a night of partying, and in so doing, violating my parole. While talking with my lawyer, who I spent all my savings on, I said he could hire better than his hideous secretary. Turns out she's his wife. I think I'm now more screwed than ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 099

You deserved it 61 256

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I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 147

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By Anonymous - 15/01/2024 16:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, after leaving my abusive partner, I checked into a hotel through a crisis service. Since then, I've been asked to have sex for $20, and also yelled at for not driving a woman to a shopping centre, which is a 5-minute walk away. I don't drive and have been here for an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 610

You deserved it 94

By worsethanzombies - 23/11/2009 16:40 - Spain

Today, my car crashed and the only refuge was at a nearby house, the resident of which was a crazy psycho. Now replace "crazy psycho" with "crazy ex-girlfriend who won't help you unless you compose a poem about how much you love her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 132

You deserved it 4 883

Feedmyaddiction5 14

Saturday 17 December 2011 6:28

That sucks! You should just go crazy and accuse her of sleeping with every guy in the state

every1luvsboners 11

Saturday 17 December 2011 6:36

So just drive around masturbating furiously until you get arrested. At least then you'll get 3 meals and a man to snuggle with.

Comments

DB13_fml 3

Saturday 17 December 2011 10:58

Maybe your wife is paranoid because she was a cheater or still is. Hire a P.I. and have her ass investigated. Then divorce her

AlwaysCracked 6

Saturday 17 December 2011 10:59

Jeeze buddy I'll help pay for the divorce.

hattypat 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 11:43

She's either psychotic as you say she is or you did something to make her believe that your some kind of cheater. There's more to this that you aren't saying.

lifes_a_b1tch 7

Saturday 17 December 2011 12:23

Go to a friends house. There's really no need to be embarrassed...your true friends already know she's psychotic and will probably ask what took you so long. Good luck :)

Ownord_fml 10

Saturday 17 December 2011 13:21

I feel for you, my mom is the same.. Even spending a few weeks in a psychiatric hospital didn't do much for her, so really just get a divorce !

evebright 5

Saturday 17 December 2011 13:54

Low income fee waiver. Go to the courthouse and ask for the form.

Trevor260 3

Saturday 17 December 2011 14:44

You should look into Legal Shield. Its a prepaid legal service. Only $16/ mo. And you will only have to pay the filing fees for the divorce, which is about $200. Its a hell of a lot cheaper than the old fashion way.