Intimacy: Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make...

By mattttbob - 04/02/2012 10:16 - Australia

Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make me exercise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 517

You deserved it 36 027

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Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By fatnick - 07/10/2009 17:06 - United States

Today, my wife told me that the only reason she gets it on with me is for the extra calorie burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 079

You deserved it 3 311

By Anonymous - 06/10/2012 23:04 - United States

Today, my girlfriend texted one of her male friends, saying she's turned off by the thought of sex with me. She suggested a bit of "exercise sex" with him. I'm sure he would have eagerly agreed, if he'd been the one receiving the texts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 053

You deserved it 2 842

By rawdoglyfe69 - 17/04/2013 06:14 - United States - Helena

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 504

You deserved it 6 079

Get on with it!

By QuickieGirl - 16/09/2011 11:28 - United States

Today, I realized my girlfriend thinks that the goal of sex is to get it over with as quickly as possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 400

You deserved it 6 128

By beaverless - 02/05/2011 20:26 - United States

Today, my girlfriend kindly broke the news to me that she doesn't want to take part in any sexual activity anymore because it's getting too boring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 558

You deserved it 17 599

Effective

By zstarr - 14/07/2012 11:15 - United States - Rome

Today, I realized my boyfriend uses sex as a way to get me to stop talking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 622

You deserved it 32 433

By anonymous - 24/06/2010 05:09 - United States

Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 705

You deserved it 5 226

Bored

By Anonymous - 23/06/2022 18:00

Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 247

You deserved it 387

Health kick

By Anonymous - 05/02/2022 00:01

Today, after my wife set a new rule to improve my health, one sex session for every three visits to the gym, which has greatly improved our sex life for two months, and I've never been fitter, but now she complains I'm not keeping her company on the couch anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 751

You deserved it 187

By evecamp - 10/02/2010 05:09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 11 months told me that she's been faking her orgasms the whole time. Just to make me "proud" of myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 107

You deserved it 5 950

beddington 7

Saturday 4 February 2012 16:05

Doesn't matter had sex.

MasterE56 4

Saturday 4 February 2012 16:01

Nothing wrong with that!

Comments

jcingram 2

Saturday 4 February 2012 22:22

Ydi....everyone does

neonberries 15

Saturday 4 February 2012 22:46

You're seriously going to complain about having sex!? And you call yourself a man!!!!

causticgirl 6

Saturday 4 February 2012 23:09

Mmmm. It's excellent cardio when done well.

momo1972 3

Saturday 4 February 2012 23:10

Can I join that gym?

mama2b3 20

Sunday 5 February 2012 0:39

Sounds like a win-win to me...

aron666 25

Sunday 5 February 2012 0:44

Only matters that she loves you, and you had sex

Shutter_Shades12 4

Sunday 5 February 2012 0:57

I love this!

droln4maltesers 8

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:23

And the problem here is...?!!!

dbnumberiv 2

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:48

Man card revoked

EduJav321 24

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:49

Think about it: Not fit = sex Toned = no sex ... i think you're good

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went to the airport to pick up my long-distance boyfriend. Having waited six months for this, I was stoked. After waiting for three hours and sending numerous messages, I was eventually informed I was a week early. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 823

You deserved it 14 278

Today, my mother-in-law "borrowed" my dog without asking, to show him off to her friends. My dog is my service animal, and I'm not comfortable leaving the house without him. I have to be at work in an hour, and she's not picking up her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 272

You deserved it 445

The Top

Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 745

You deserved it 3 630

Today, my boyfriend wanted to get into an open relationship. He has no romantic feelings for me anymore, but he didn't want to separate from my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 153

You deserved it 1 379

Today, my shirt caught on fire when I was burning paper for my ancestors at the cemetery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 343

You deserved it 369

Today, my boyfriend told me that my vagina looks like Yoda. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 648

You deserved it 5 649

Today, I went to have a vaginal ultrasound. The nurse walked me back and I got undressed. She said the tech doing the procedure would be right in. It was my preacher's son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 139

Today, I went to a new doctor for an injury. Instead, the doctor only focused on my weight and tried to basically prescribe me anorexia. She tried to tell me that 750 calories a day was fine and brushed off my exercise regimen as, "Exercise is great, but you'll lose weight faster if there are no calories to burn." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 221

You deserved it 182